30: ADHD Self-Sabotage: Why Fear of Disappointment Stops You From Trying

If you keep talking yourself out of the things you want right before you start, your ADHD self-sabotage may be a nervous system in fight-or-flight, treating disappointment like a threat, and learning to feel safe trying can get you moving again. This episode is for the ADHDer who wonders why their ADHD makes them avoid trying new things, even when nobody would ever know if it flopped.

I explain why ADHD fear of failure and fear of disappointment come down to safety, and how fight-or-flight makes vulnerability feel dangerous. I share the story of closing my last group enrollment early, a handful of spots short of full, and what I realized about it afterward. You'll also hear how ADHD rejection sensitivity shows up when you hold back on asking for a promotion or asking someone out, plus why the awkward beginner phase feels so intolerable and what yoga and tennis have taught me about it.

You'll leave with a way to tell real danger from plain discomfort and one small step to try this week, a good starting point for nervous system regulation for ADHD.

02:35 – Why ADHD fight-or-flight makes trying feel dangerous

03:45 – Jenna's group launch story and ADHD self-sabotage

08:30 – ADHD fear of failure and the awkward beginner phase

11:28 – How nervous system regulation changes what feels possible

13:16 – How to practice vulnerability with ADHD without forcing it

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You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here: adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Want to thrive with ADHD? Come hang out with me on Instagram! Get out of paralysis, be more productive, and enjoy your life again! Join an upcoming group!