When You Want a Baby, But He Already Has Kids with Jen, the Sober Stepmom

Being a stepmom while trying for a baby of your own can turn even the sweetest moments into grief triggers. Rebecca sits down with Jen, known online as The Sober Stepmom, for a raw, honest conversation about infertility, IVF, sobriety, and what it really feels like to want an "ours baby" in a blended family. Jen shares how she met her husband on Hinge, became a stepmom to his two young sons, and then found herself unexpectedly pulled toward motherhood after watching him show up as a devoted dad. From there, the conversation gets deeply personal as she opens up about trying to conceive naturally, tracking cycles, exploring acupuncture and holistic support, and eventually moving into IVF after learning that time, age, and bloodwork made a more aggressive path make sense. You'll discover:

• Why IVF can feel like an emotional rollercoaster long before the pregnancy test
• How daily hormone shots, egg retrievals, and embryo attrition affect both body and mind
• The way infertility grief can show up in stepmotherhood, from loud households to affectionate father moments that suddenly sting
• What "childless stepmom" really means, and why Jen breaks it into very different lived experiences
• Practical regulation tools like solo hotel or Airbnb stays, noise-canceling headphones, movement, journaling, and intentional one-on-one time with your partner

Jen also explains how sobriety became part of her stepmom journey. She gets candid about why alcohol no longer fit the version of herself she wanted to be for two little boys, and how the tools she learned in sobriety now shape the way she coaches other women toward steadier, more authentic stepmotherhood. This episode is for stepmoms, childless stepmoms, women navigating IVF, and anyone who has ever been told to just be grateful for what they already have. It is a conversation about grief, identity, boundaries, and the fierce work of staying grounded when family, fertility, and your nervous system all collide.If you've ever needed someone to say, "yes, this is hard, and no, you are not crazy," this one will feel like exhale-worthy company. Perfect for anyone who wants real talk, practical support, and a reminder that you can love your stepkids deeply while still wanting more.

Connect with Jen on Instagram - @the_sober_stepmom 

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