Why Talented Engineers Say No to Opportunities — Imposter Syndrome, Thinking Fast and Slow, and Career Confidence

Lu brought the topic this week — and it's one of the most universally felt things in audio that nobody talks about directly: the feeling of not belonging in the room. Not because you don't have the skill. Not because you don't have the credits. Just because the feeling is there, and most people let it make the decision for them.

The episode opens with Lu sharing what he keeps hearing in consultation calls — talented engineers at every level passing on sessions they would have handled just fine, because they didn't feel ready. Dee and Lu are direct about it: the gap between someone who is working and someone who isn't is almost never the quality of their mixing. It's almost always confidence and forward motion. They unpack what imposter syndrome actually looks like at different stages of a career — not just at the beginning, but also at the mid-level, when asking for help or shadowing someone starts to feel embarrassing in a way that holds people back just as much.

From there, Dee reads from Daniel Kahneman's Thinking Fast and Slow — specifically the chapter on cognitive priming — and the episode gets genuinely fascinating. He walks through the Florida Effect study, where participants subconsciously primed with age-related words actually walked slower down a hallway without knowing it. Then the pencil experiment, where people forced into a smile by how they held a pencil in their teeth rated cartoons as funnier than those forced into a frown — without being aware their facial expression had changed at all. The implication is direct: acting calm and confident doesn't just make you look calm and confident to others. It statistically makes you feel calmer and more confident yourself.

The conversation also takes an unexpected turn into money priming — how the mere presence of money-related imagery in your environment makes people measurably more independent, more self-reliant, and also more selfish and socially distant — and what that means for the environments engineers build and the mindsets they carry into sessions.

It ends where it started: the feeling of not belonging is not evidence of not belonging. Send the email. Ask to sit in. Shadow the session. The only thing making the street look longer than it is, is you.

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The Mixing Music Podcast is a video and audio series on the art of music production and post-production. Dee Kei, Lu, and James are professionals in the Los Angeles music industry having worked with names like Odetari, 6arelyhuman, Trey Songz, Keyshia Cole, Benny the Butcher, carolesdaughter, Crying City, Daphne Loves Derby, Natalie Jane, charlieonnafriday, bludnymph, Lay Bankz, Rico Nasty, Ayesha Erotica, ATEEZ, Dizzy Wright, Kanye West, Blackway, The Game, Dylan Espeseth, Tara Yummy, Asteria, Kets4eki, Shaquille O'Neal, Republic Records, Interscope Records, Arista Records, Position Music, Capital Records, Mercury Records, Universal Music Group, apg, Hive Music, Sony Music, and many others.

This podcast is meant to be used for educational purposes only. This show is filmed and recorded at Dee Kei's private studio in North Hollywood, California. If you would like to sponsor the show, please email us at ⁠[email protected]⁠.