Philokalia Ministries

Holy inebriation! We are to become drunk with faith.  For those inebriated with alcohol there is often a loss of the capacity to think about things or see things clearly. For those inebriated with faith, there is a loss of sight of the things of this world and attraction to them because one’s gaze is fixed upon the Beloved. Love alone draws the soul forward. Indeed, it is by the grace of God that we make that initial turn towards Him and so begin to see with a greater clarity the inconstancy that sin brings into our life and the healing, the hope, and the joy that faith alone provides.  

Our senses and our natural faculties that we use constantly to perceive the world around us often become a source of distortion because of the weakening of our will and the darkening of our intellect. And even if these faculties should function perfectly, they still are incapable of comprehending God as he is in himself.  

When faith begins to grow, we begin to see the presence of God in all things and his Providence acting on our behalf. Love, seeks union and communion and perfect Love is present in our lives in a transformative fashion. We need not fear affliction, poverty, or the hatred of others knowing that we are loved with a perfect love. We are never in isolation when we are in Christ through faith and the grace that he provides us. The inconstancy of sin is replaced with the stability and fearlessness of faith. The world can take everything from us, including our honor, and yet we find no loss in it. With St Paul we count all things as refuse in comparison to knowing Jesus Christ and him crucified. Isaac wants a to understand the need to be fully immersed in this love, to be inebriated by it and permeated by it so that it shapes our entire existence.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:02:32 Paisios: Baptismal. One moment I'll get headphones.

00:09:33 Una: I see we have a dog and cat in attendance tonight

00:09:45 Una: Very Franciscan

00:09:59 Una: Are they keen on Isaac?

00:14:26 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 114, # 7

00:16:53 Paisios: Reacted to "Are they keen on I..." with ❤️

00:22:00 Eric Jobe: There is an emphasis here on “perception” (rgeshta), which he repeats, a perception of the power of faith versus the perception of visible matter. I think this keys into the notion of being drunk. When we are drunk, we lose perception. If we are drunk with faith, we lose perception of worldly things and become perceptive to spiritual things.

00:22:07 Una: How does this paragraph fit with the essence/energy ?

00:23:10 Una: Thank you

00:23:40 Jamie: Reacted to "There is an emphas..." with 👍

00:23:42 Lee Graham: Reacted to "There is an emphasis…" with ❤️

00:27:50 Alex Underwood: Reacted to "There is an emphasis..." with 👍

00:36:46 Bob Čihák, AZ: Just over the last few days, my nous perceived than I am a reflection of God in that He created me in His “image and likeness.” Other people are also blessed in this way. I’m seeing Christ more easily in others.

00:37:18 Rachel L.: Is it wrong then,to want to be comfortable around people,  want friends, and have relationships with others outside of my family?

00:37:50 Anthony: Our parish priest said something very important: it is very difficult to commit a mortal sin. 
This counters a tendency to fear we will lose God, that is kind of common among "traditional" ways of thinking.

00:37:58 Rachel L.: I'm confused about the practical application of this

00:42:35 Eric Jobe: St. Isaac makes a contrast between fear of death and fear of God (who destroys death by death). It seems we are controlled by one or the other, as if some type of fear is necessary. Why? Perhaps because we lack perfect love that “casts out all fear”. I believe it is something that Diadochos of Photiki talks about in Philokalia Vol. 1.

00:42:44 Joshua Sander: I've been reading commentary on the book of Job, and it seems to correspond well to this paragraph, especially demanding investigation due to a lack of faith, and then moving from that to a faith that is born of grace and viewing God relationally rather than legalistically. Do Isaac or any of the other Fathers view Job's journey in this way?

00:45:14 Catherine Opie: Reacted to "There is an emphasis..." with ❤️

00:45:45 Kate : Is this trust in the providence of God something that we bring about in ourselves, or is it a grace that we must pray and beg God to give to us?

00:56:36 Art: This paragraph calls to mind St John of the Cross “…if the desire of the will be dispersed among other things than virtue, it must be weaker as regards virtue.  And thus the soul whose will is set upon various trifles is like water…never rises.”   Ascent of Mt Carmel.

00:59:50 Paisios: "Silence is the womb of wisdom"

01:00:07 Paisios: I don't

01:11:13 Kathleen: Can’t find raise hand. But can you elaborate more on #13?  Examples? Perhaps next week if no time.

01:14:00 Una: Look under "reactions" on the tool bar on the bottom. It's an icon of a heart

01:14:20 Una: Right beside "chat"

01:15:00 Anthony: Sorry I can't find the raise hand button.  I sense now the same sense of rage and vengeance as in 2001

01:17:19 Myles Davidson: Replying to "Can’t find raise han..."

Maybe repost your question so Fr. sees it

01:19:03 Paisios: In my rage, whose heart will I change?

01:19:25 Jessica Imanaka: Reacted to "In my rage, whose he..." with 👍

01:19:43 Carol Roper: Reacted to "In my rage, whose he…" with 👍

01:20:04 Edward Kleinguetl: “God’s love is powerful enough to heal everything, but you must find the courage to decide to pass through the ‘narrow gate’ of forgiveness. This choice is more demanding than the spontaneous reaction of resentment and accusation, but it is a decision in favor of true life.” (Fr. Jacques Philippe)

01:20:28 Elizabeth Richards: Reacted to "“God’s love is power..." with ❤️

01:20:32 Fr. Miron Kerul-Kmec Jr.: Reacted to "“God’s love is power..." with ❤️

01:20:54 Mary Clare Wax: I think of the movie, "The Mission," where some of the priests decided to fight back, and in the end, they were all killed. It was a very sad thing to see. I so hoped they would change their minds and pray until the end like the Superior of the Jesuits did.

01:23:28 Edward Kleinguetl: Reacted to "I think of the movie..." with ❤️

01:23:52 Edward Kleinguetl: Reacted to "In my rage, whose he..." with 👍

01:25:42 Catherine Opie: Since I have become Catholic and humbled myself before God the anxiety and restlessness I always felt has disappeared. Now I find I am  even more humbled by becoming an outsider in my family and with old friends because of this choice. I feel grief but not anxiety. Because

01:25:58 Gina Marie: Reacted to "“God’s love is power..." with ❤️

01:26:24 Tracey Fredman: Reacted to "Since I have become ..." with ❤️

01:27:04 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:27:07 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:27:13 Gina Marie: Thank you, Father!

01:27:17 Jeffrey Ott: Thank you!

01:27:20 Joe: Thank you Fr. Charbel

01:27:23 paul g.: Excellent tonite

01:27:25 David: Thank you Father. May you be blessed with good health

01:27:50 Catherine Opie: Thank you Fr.

01:28:25 David: Meeting Planner – Find best time across Time Zones

Fear and hope! These are the two realities that are put before us by the writings of the fathers on the struggle with lust and fornication. They are hard stories to listen to for in them we begin to see the poverty of man and what we are capable of doing not only in our lesser moments, but when we turn away from God in the slightest fashion. Whatever one’s religious identity might be or how vigorously one has embraced the ascetic life, what brings an individual to the depths of sin is hubris; trusting in our own understanding or following our own desires in such a way that we put ourselves in God to the test. 

Thus, the stories should give rise to fear within our hearts in order that we might place our trust only in God and cling to him through constant prayer. However, we are also give that which provides hope of salvation through the very same stories. God does not abandon us even when we have turned away from him. He will use every means possible (other people or affliction) to draw us back to himself. He will turn the world upside down if it gives rise to a spirit of repentance within our hearts. It is this repentance that draws us out of the mire. 

The fathers are quick to instruct us that we are not to abhor human sexuality or members of the opposite sex. However, we must respect the power of natural desire, especially when it is paired with concupiscence. The darkness brought to our minds because of our sin often leads us to objectify the other; to lose sight of their dignity and to focus simply on ourselves and the satisfying of our needs. The fathers would have us understand the great power of the demons. We are told in one story this evening where all of the forest in the place were consumed by the flame that came from the serpent being cast out.  We must understand, then, that we are not simply struggling with our natural defects and flaws but rather with principalities and powers. 

Sin is a fearful thing and true faith allows us to see its ugliness and destructiveness. This same faith allows us to see the only source of our true hope – Christ. With humility let us cry out to him that he might show us his abundant mercy.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:38:06 Forrest Cavalier: Hard topic1

00:38:59 Forrest Cavalier: I've heard bits and pieces of what you have said, from different people, who were not prelates. The 1970's approach of trying a cure was disastrous.

00:54:15 Forrest Cavalier: Teach us to strive from the pulpit. Hebrews 12:9-12 Besides this, we have had our earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them. Should we not [then] submit all the more to the Father of spirits and live? They disciplined us for a short time as seemed right to them, but he does so for our benefit, in order that we may share his holiness. At the time, all discipline seems a cause not for joy but for pain, yet later it brings the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who are trained by it.e

00:59:41 Forrest Cavalier: A fire poker

01:00:43 Maureen Cunningham: If he would have fell and a chid would came then he could not be a church Father .  What would happen

01:04:32 Anthony: I worked for a firm that worked in divorces and in child protection....even in the Bible Belt, divorce is a SERIOUS problem. We don't have much understanding beyond flesh, and that is reinforced by ads and movies and cartoons and songs.

01:08:49 Maureen Cunningham: Always a Blessing  Thank You

01:09:36 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:09:36 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:09:51 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father.

01:12:09 Maureen Cunningham: Yay for you Father ,  and for all those who listen

01:13:06 Arthur Danzi: Thank you, father

How we begin something often determines how it will develop in later stages and the fruit that it will bear. Thus, Saint Isaac tells us, that the beginning of the path of life is our immersion in the word of God and to live in poverty. This is strikingly unlike how other ascetic/mystical writers begin speaking about the discipline of virtue. Isaac immediately encourages us to take the focus off of ourselves, of our own judgment of the world as well as to remove our attachment to the things of this world. Our identity is rooted in God. We have been made in his image and likeness and we only find the fulfillment of love and life for which our hearts long in him. To exercise the mind in the words of God is not like reading a book on history. It is opening the heart to receive the fullness of what God has revealed to us and when we approach this word in faith and silence, it allows God to speak a word that is equal to himself. It allows that Divine word to be born in our hearts. This encounter is what transforms us and fills the heart with desire for what we are promised in Christ; that is, theosis, deification, being made one is with God by grace. The more this desire grows within us the less we are attached to the things of this world.  We seek to simplify our lives.  To become poor in the things of this world allows us to become rich in that which endures. Free from the anxiety that our attachment to the things of this world brings we are able to immerse ourselves in the eternal word of God. Lacking this, Isaac tells us, no one can draw close to God. The more occupied we are with the things of the world the more susceptible we become to the passions. When we surround ourselves with the noise of the world all of the senses are flooded and we are in a constant state of receptivity. Thus, we become less receptive to the one thing necessary and that is sanctifying. What we find in Isaac then and what makes his writing so captivating is his understanding that love is the most powerful source of motivation and transformation. It is Christ who raises us up out of the poverty of our sin and when we have Him, as St paul reminds us, everything else appears to be mere refuse.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:07:20 Una: Where is the hand button?

00:07:58 Una: Mine is a heart icon

00:10:21 Una: I feel like Isaac the way I felt when I first discovered the Bible. Total immersion

00:11:48 Una: Replying to "I feel like Isaac ..."

I have not been able to stop listening to the audiobook

00:11:53 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 113, # 4

00:11:55 Daniel Allen: i am but my camera and mic aren't working

00:11:57 Daniel Allen: yes

00:11:59 Daniel Allen: confirmed

00:12:13 Daniel Allen: on a laptop instead of ipad tonight and i can't seem to figure out zoom on this

00:12:34 Daniel Allen: not sure if you can see my typing

00:13:07 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 113, # 4

00:16:56 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 113, # 4

00:29:27 Kathleen: Rationale thought

00:34:38 Lee Graham: No

00:46:20 Maureen Cunningham: I find everyone seems so Angry these days.

00:46:40 Maureen Cunningham: Silence is the only way

00:51:16 Daniel Allen: It's hard to leave Christ for Christ, to see it as such. As a parent, sometimes the last thing you want is a kid asking you a question, or really anyone needing you. And inevitably when you try to find time to pray, that's when you're needed without fail. The natural reaction, especially after awhile, can be frustration. So to "leave Christ for Christ" is a challenging thing to actually do.

00:54:20 Joshua Sander: Forgive my question for going back a paragraph in the text, but when Isaac speaks of "the word of God," is he simply speaking of the formal canon of Scripture, or is he extending this to the holy writings of the Fathers as well?

00:56:36 Catherine Opie: Reacted to "It's hard to leave C..." with ❤️

01:00:14 Anthony: If St Neri is an example, this becoming prayer comes gradually, organically. It isn't grasped at with ambition.

01:00:41 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "If St Neri is an exa..." with 👍🏼

01:07:09 Nick Bodmer: We are amusing ourselves to death

01:08:16 The Recovery Community Hub of PBC, Inc.: At our wedding our priest had this line that stuck with me, that every single struggle in marriage will ultimately lead to the cultivation of a virtue that each of the spouses needs to attain heaven

01:08:36 Alex Underwood: It seems like Isaac’s concept of “separation” here could be a direct lesson from and emulation of Jesus when he would remove himself into the wilderness or desert to pray and commune with the Father?

01:18:36 Kevin Burke: Thank You Father, this is awesome !

01:18:38 Elizabeth Richards: Thank you Father!

01:18:41 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You

01:18:44 santiagobua: Thank you Father!!

01:18:46 Nypaver Clan: Sorry to disagree with Lord Byron…If I thought “marriage was hell” I wouldn’t have stuck with it for 41 years.   🥰

01:18:47 Una: That's very tempting to do Isaac more than once a week

01:18:52 Francisco Ingham: Thank you father!

01:18:52 Una: What about Friday?

01:18:53 Daniel Allen: Thank you Father!

01:19:32 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:19:35 Joe Mugo: Thank you Father.

01:19:37 Bob Čihák, AZ: Bless you, Father!

01:19:37 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:19:56 Catherine Opie: That sounds wonderful

01:20:01 Elizabeth Richards: Lenten group sounds good!!

01:20:03 Anthony: Ok sounds good.

01:20:04 Maureen Cunningham: Ok Saturday is wonderful

01:20:07 ANDREW ADAMS: That sounds great!

01:20:09 Kevin Burke: Reacted to "Ok sounds good." with 👌

01:20:14 Dave Warner | AL: Thank you Father! Would like to participate in a Lenten group.

01:20:17 Joe Mugo: Reacted to "Ok sounds good." with 👌

01:20:17 Catherine Opie: 🙏🏻

As we are drawn more deeply into the spiritual warfare of the Desert fathers and learn from their stories of how the demons will provoke a soul and lure it into sin, we begin to see how important it is to put on the mind of Christ; that is, to embrace fully the mindset of the person of faith and the life that we are meant to embody. One of the beautiful aspects of the Evergetinos is that it does not simply present us with teachings but also with the concrete struggle of the fathers and the nature and subtlely of demonic provocation. 

We begin to understand that there is no room for pride in the spiritual life. In particular with the passion of fornication, it is the coward who is the victor; that is, he who flees. Our strength is found only in the Lord and clinging to him. We must have no illusion about the strength of our virtue, no matter how long we have engaged in the spiritual life or how virtuous we may seem to be. “Pride rideth before the fall”. 

We also see in these stories how the demons sing out to the soul in order to present the temptation as the most attractive and beautiful of things. They can draw even the most seasoned of ascetics into a kind of crazed frenzy or mania. Therefore, we are taught that we must turn immediately to the Lord, raising our hands to the heavens and falling on our knees, begging for his protection. 

The demons will show no mercy. In fact, their goal is not simply to draw an individual into sin, but also to draw them into despair where repentance is stymied. After a fall, they become the soul’s accuser and will even use scripture to mock her in such a way as to drive her into greater darkness. Their desire is to make us lose confidence in the mercy and compassion of God.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:05:21 Bob Cihak: P. 212 # 8

00:13:45 Bob Cihak: P. 212 # 8

00:20:40 Wayne: What page?

00:20:53 Nypaver Clan: 213

00:21:00 Nypaver Clan: top

00:21:05 Wayne: thanks

00:28:27 Fr Marty, AZ 480-292-3381: It's interesting to consider that we can till the soil for this temptation by giving into other passions. Just reminds me to be vigilant, especially in how I consider others. And in fleeing too. Valuable insight to help me realize that I'm not as blindsided as I thought but I'd been opening doors to weaken me in temptation.

00:32:14 Anthony: Sometimes it takes getting sick and tired of the situation to develop a contempt for it.

00:35:04 Fr Marty, AZ 480-292-3381: Did you say the mindset is called phronema?

00:35:48 Kate : The mindset you describe is like nothing I have ever heard or experienced being a Latin Rite Catholic.

00:39:49 Anthony: The West co.es by it honestly...having to know by size, weight a day number, which medieval texts extrapolate I think from Sirach.  I prefer St Ephrem's poem on the Hidden Pearl taken as a unity.

00:40:12 Anthony: Comes

00:42:19 Nina and Sparky: Phil 2:2 πληρώσατέ μου τὴν χαρὰν ἵνα τὸ αὐτὸ φρονῆτε     "fill up my cup of happiness by thinking with the same mind"  See the last greek word phronete. In modern writing, I have heard the phrase "according to the mind of the church"

00:42:25 Myles Davidson: The word “re-enchantment” is being used more amongst some Catholic circles. The need to return to a more poetic pre-Cartesian worldview

00:44:00 Anthony: Reacted to The word “re-enchant... with "👍"

00:44:11 Nina and Sparky: Sorry, it is me, Forrest Cavalier.

00:51:36 Myles Davidson: The Jesus Prayer is the fastest way to shake off unwanted thoughts, in my experience.

01:04:33 Anthony: But if we can trust what demons say (something I really don't like) their mockery gave a clue of the problem....Exaltation by arrogance.  So, do the opposite.

01:08:20 Fr Marty, AZ 480-292-3381: This seems to reveal that the devil's plan is more than just sin, from which we can again stand and receive forgiveness, but the devil, through sin stirred by pride, attempts  to poison our mind into despair or to forget God and his love for us and our vocation.

01:09:56 Anthony: The devil made himself a bastard in relation to the Creator and wants to bastardize and neuter us.

01:14:26 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:14:28 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:14:34 Bob Cihak: Bless you, Father.

01:14:55 Bob Cihak: I forgive you.

It bears saying that we find ourselves upon a privileged path as we begin this new journey with Saint Isaac the Syrian. To have access to his writings and access to such a translation in the West is a recent phenomenon and one not to be taken lightly. Further it is often said that Isaac is the greatest of the Desert Fathers in that through his writings one can move from being a novice in the spiritual life to the heights of contemplation.

Immediately, one discovers that Isaac is unique and distinctive in his manner of approaching the spiritual life. He appeals to our capacity in faith to comprehend divine love and what has been revealed to us through Christ. It is what we comprehend in faith that fills the heart with wonder; that we are embraced by a love that never ends and that only seeks to raise us up out of the darkness of sin to the fullness of light. Isaac understands that, made in the image and likeness of God, we are going to be driven by desire; that is, a sense of lack and incompleteness. God has made us for himself and we only find our identity and the fullness for which we long in him.

Our struggle is our attachment to the things of this world, including our own ego – the self. There are so many things that vie for our attention that the “one thing necessary” is often pushed out to the margins of our life or out of mind altogether. The love out of which we have been created and the lavish love through which we have been redeemed is often supplanted by that which eventually turns to dust.

Our awareness of this should produce within us a fear that creates a movement toward God. Repentance is simply or acting on that awareness; turning away from our sin and our attachment to the things of this world and opening ourselves up to the healing grace and mercy of God. It is for this reason that Isaac does not focus on the development of virtue and the overcoming of vice as others do. For ultimately, we are not seeking the perfection of natural virtue or even to exceed what we understand as the heights of virtue. Rather, we are to understand the ascetic life is radically tied to being “in Christ”. In other words, the radical transformation that takes place through the grace that we receive through baptism, the Eucharist, and through the gift of the Holy Spirit leads to our participation in the life of the Trinity. Deification is what has been promised to those of faith. It is divine humility, divine love, divine compassion, and divine vulnerability that we are to embody. This takes place not through raw grit but rather through abandonment to Christ in a spirit of humility. As we let go of the illusion of self identity, independent of Christ, the true self begins to emerge. 
Thus if we take anything away from this evening’s discussion and reflection it should be the sense of wonder and desire that Isaac seeks to cultivate within the human heart. Love alone endures and the desire it produces inflames the heart to pursue the Beloved and the Life of the Kingdom.

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Text of chat during the group: 

00:15:34 Bob Cihak: Father's Substack comments are another blessing for me. The come by email to me, several times daily and are beautifully succinct, most of the time.

00:17:15 Sr. Mary Clare: Thank you, Father!

00:36:18 Ren Witter: Sr. Barbara - would you mind sending your question to the whole group in the chat so that the people reading/listening to the podcast know what you asked? (I think your question must have been sent directly to Fr. Charbel).

00:36:30 mflory: The whole first paragraph is a chain of practices/virtues: reflection on the “restitution” (providence/the second coming) leads to withdrawal from the world which leads to control of thoughts which leads to faith which leads to fear of God which leads to virtue.

00:36:33 Jamie: Reacted to "Sr. Barbara - woul..." with 👍

00:37:26 mflory: Mark

00:38:37 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: Sentence two begins with "It"  - referring to fear of the Lord or to faith?

00:38:42 Eric Jobe: Some comments:
The fear of God - it strikes me like the Freudio-Lacanian notion of symbolic castration, whereby we are inscribed into the divine order of virtue.

In Syriac, St. Isaac specifically says that one “takes the opportunity to withdraw his mind from the world” This is important I think - we have an opportunity that we must deliberately take.

…
00:39:21 Ren Witter: Reacted to " Sentence two begins..." with 👍🏼

00:40:19 Eric Jobe: This “reflection on the restitution to come” is more evocative in the Syriac. There is a kind of dazzling imagination - sharagragriatha. And “restitution” is the order of the age to come - tuqana. It is a positive thing to meditate on imaginatively, not the judgment to come.

00:41:15 Josh: Would it be possible to get a link to the copy of the book that is being used? I missed the email that may've said it.

00:41:47 Ren Witter: https://www.bostonmonks.com/product_info.php/products_id/635/?srsltid=AfmBOorJmXoZG7njKJoH-E9BPgTnoNHhClUY3JtkWMW_1R4AAeZ_fCRp

00:41:47 ANDREW ADAMS: Replying to "Would it be possible..."

https://www.bostonmonks.com/product_info.php/cPath/75_105/products_id/635

00:41:55 Jamie: Can we interpret fear as aligned with awe? By that I mean: fear implies awareness of unknown about the object we fear. God is the ultimate mystery...we can't know him perfectly, so the fear is a healthy appreciation for "other". It's living in the reality that God is entirely other than creation. We appreciate how utterly other God is as object, so we fear God in awe and wonder. We will never fully know God, even as we grow in intimacy with him, so we continue to fear / awe God. It's a healthy thing. Is this a workable interpretation? If this is workable, it would seem the beginning of virtue is to appreciate God as not me, akin to he must increase and I must decrease. It's a fear that leads me closer to God -- not driven away, because this Utterly Other is the object who can provide for me all my needs.

00:42:04 Niño: I think the modern day problem is that we often associate the Love for God with emotionalism or sensationalism ...but like what you said father..the discipline, the virtues are ways of showing and increasing our love for God 

00:42:05 David: Is the focus on fear of the lord similar to training wheels to focus our attention on God and push away the work of the evil thoughts often using fear. I see later writings say once you have mastered the fear then you focus on love of God and each moment and expression of love possibly leaving fear like training wheels behind?

00:42:07 Josh: Replying to "Would it be possible..."

Thank you!

00:42:15 Josh: Replying to "https://www.bostonmo..."

Thank you!

00:43:21 Eric Jobe: Replying to " Sentence two begins..."

“Fear” most likely. It’s ambiguous in Syriac, but “fear” is the grammatical topic.

00:44:16 Ren Witter: Standard procedure for questions: If you have a question you would like Fr. Charnel to respond to in the group, please type your question, and then “raise your hand.” Once Father sees the hand, and calls your name, send the message.

00:45:47 Anthony: So "restitution" is like "restoration."

00:45:54 Niño: Reacted to So "restitution" is ... with "❤️"

00:46:12 Jamie: Reacted to "Standard procedure..." with 👍

00:48:09 Anthony: A spirituality of "The Song of Songs."

00:48:34 Jamie: Reacted to "So "restitution" i..." with ✍️

00:50:34 Gina Marie: Reacted to "Standard procedure f..." with 👍

00:50:45 Rebecca Thérèse: I don't know about Syriac but in biblical Hebrew (a closely related Semitic language) "fear" as in "the fear of the Lord" can also be translated "reverence".

00:57:39 Anthony: $ for land too. 😉

00:58:08 Ryan Ngeve: Father is there a connection between Isaac’s phrase on the fear of God and proverbs 9:10?

00:59:04 David: Reacted to "Father is there a co..." with 👍

00:59:35 Nick Bodmer: People are realizing that they aren't fulfilled, so they are trying all these things to have a chance to fill the void within themselves.

01:00:22 Niño: Reacted to People are realizing... with "❤️"

01:01:48 Eric Jobe: “Contain himself” could be translated from Syriac as “recollects”, which brings up the prodigal son as well as the myriad of statements of the Fathers on the notion of recollection.

01:04:00 Eric Jobe: “Honor” is plural in the Syriac. It likely refers to many instances of others giving honor, like we may say in English: “He received many honors from the military.”

01:06:07 Jamie: In his high priestly prayer, Jesus prays that the Father would glorify him. Jesus can handle being honored, but he does NOT seek honor from men...he seeks it from his heavenly Father. If we are to imitate God in fear, healthy appreciate and awe for God as the provider of all our needs, then we should seek the glory God wishes to give us, which likely means Cross in this world and heavenly paradise in the next (because heaven we will see him face to face...the ultimate honor).

01:07:19 Catherine Eisenbrandt: Father how do you tell the difference between when you need to be obedient and accept “good” active things as service and when not to engage

01:12:13 Niño: Without Love for God, there is no real love for neighbor

Christ showed His love for us by dying on the cross to save us from sin death and hell... Therefore the Love of a neighbor also means to admonish them of obvious sin and to help them, if they are willing, to go to confession 

01:13:49 St. Stanislaus Kostka Religious Education: Next Sunday's Gospel includes being concerned more abou the splinter in the other's eye rather than the beam in our own.

01:17:04 maureencunningham: Thank  You Father Blessing

01:17:21 Jamie: Reacted to "Thank  You Father ..." with 🙏

01:17:40 Niño: Salamat Padre (Thank you Father-Filipino language)

01:18:34 Julie’s iPhone: Thank you Father 
You are in my prayers

01:18:53 Laura: Reacted to "Thank you Father 
Yo..." with 👍🏼

01:19:14 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:19:15 Dave Warner | AL: Thank you Father!

01:19:16 David: Thank you Father. God bless you and your mother!

01:19:17 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:19:24 Jeffrey Ott: Thank you!

01:19:25 Mari: Thank you

01:19:31 Tommie’s iPhone: Glory to Jesus Christ

01:19:32 Gina Marie: Thank you, Father!

01:19:35 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: Thank you!

01:19:45 Ben: Thank you, Father! God bless.

Once again, we are blessed by the practical counsel of the fathers in regard to the struggle with the passion of lust and fornication. What becomes evident is that the struggle is primarily with the thoughts and how we address them in our lives. The origin of such thoughts may be from ourselves and our own memories, what we experience with our senses in the present moment or from demonic provocation. Whatever their origin, our asceticism must be such that we are willing to lay all such thoughts aside in preference for remaining in stillness with our focus set upon Christ. 

It is always best not to engage the thoughts that rush upon us understanding that we will be overwhelmed, especially if their origin is from the demons. We are not to argue or wrestle with the thoughts but rather call upon the holy name of our Lord and to plead for his help and strength. 

This is the source of our healing, even in ways that we do not comprehend. The more we call upon the Lord, the deeper the healing becomes and the more free we become from our attachment to the things of this world. The Jesus Prayer in particular can be used as a gentle weapon to cut away the thoughts as they come upon us. When we are able, it is beneficial to say the prayer in an audible fashion making use of multiple senses. Having a chotki in hand as we say the Prayer and making prostrations repeatedly involves the whole self in the spiritual battle. When we humble ourselves in mind and body before God, He rushes to our aid. 

Thus, humility, vigilance and constancy of prayer must be the foundation of our ascetic practice. Furthermore, we must be simple and not count ourselves as clever in this battle. The wiles of the evil one can turn even our conversations about piety into instruments that agitate and stir up the heart. Let us examine our hearts well as we approach the Great Fast and ask the Lord to be our strength.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:11:46 Niño: Have a nice day everybody 💞 it's 830 am Feb 25 Tuesday here Philippine time

00:15:10 Bob Cihak: P. 210, # G

00:15:46 Kathleen: What is the name of teh beginner’s book?

00:16:07 Kathleen: Thank you

00:16:28 Myles Davidson: https://www.amazon.com/Beginners-Introduction-Philokalia-2016/dp/1880971798

00:16:39 Kathleen: Thank you Myles

00:17:05 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Thank you Myles" with 🙏

00:20:50 Josh: Can anyone tell me what page we are on tonight? Thanks.

00:21:03 Bob Cihak: P. 210, # G

00:21:10 Josh: Thank you

00:28:40 Maureen Cunningham: Maybe it was to protect women. It seems that women were used like property and could be cast away and killed.

00:39:46 Myles Davidson: This advice at the end of this saying reminds me of this quote you posted today Fr.
“Unceasing calling upon the name of God cures one not only of passions, but also of actions; and as a medicine affects a sick man without his comprehension, similarly the invocation of the name of God destroys passions in a manner beyond our comprehension."

00:40:25 Adam Paige: We have to choose: the news or the nous ! ;)

00:40:30 Maureen Cunningham: Beautiful movie free

00:40:48 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "We have to choose: t..." with 😊

00:40:49 Bob Cihak: When I decided, a long time ago, to let passionate thoughts just go by me, and ignore them, it lightened me a lot. I call this my toreodor defense.

00:40:49 Forrest Cavalier: Reacted to "We have to choose: t..." with 👍

00:40:55 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Beautiful movie free" with 👍

00:43:27 Niño: Is there a prayer before and after doing a prostration? I used to do prostrations 33 times while meditating on the passion of Christ ...

00:46:08 Niño: Reacted to We have to choose: t... with "❤️"

00:47:08 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Beautiful movie free" with 🎞️

00:47:24 Niño: The power of the name of Christ is calming the storms within and without ...

00:48:13 Maureen Cunningham: What is the nous

00:48:32 Nypaver Clan: Replying to "What is the nous"

The eye of the soul

00:48:39 sr charista: As well, regarding main stream news it is said that 6 people own all the stations, it is the deceptive mockingbird media with an nefarious agenda it seems.

00:50:03 Niño: Yperagia Theotoke Soson Imas

00:50:41 Suzanne Romano: Reacted to We have to choose: t... with "😊"

00:54:05 Adam Paige: Replying to "Yperagia Theotoke So..."

Yperagia Theotoke Soson Imas  ΥΠΕΡΑΓΙΑ ΘΕΟΤΟΚΕ ΣΩΣΟΝ ΗΜΑΣ// Most Holy Mother of God save us

01:01:17 Niño: Thus having an icon that would remind us of our goal and skull to remind us of death would help our imagination to focus on the things that are eternally true

01:02:05 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Thus having an icon ..." with 💀

01:07:20 Kathleen: You mentioned earlier about conversations that go in an unholy direction…it’s awkward at best finding ways to change the subject or exit or be silent without any body language or gestures that may indicate approval of the conversation.  i find myself in these situations so looking for ways to handle

01:07:38 Niño: Reacted to You mentioned earlie... with "❤️"

01:08:06 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "pic-a711b3ac-351b-4294-8af5-576d965386f4.jpg" with 👍

01:09:31 Josh: Reacted to "You mentioned earlie..." with ❤️

01:09:40 Josh: Reacted to "pic-a711b3ac-351b-4294-8af5-576d965386f4.jpg" with 👍

01:12:02 Adam Paige: Replying to "You mentioned earlie..."

"7. Do not regard the feelings of a person who speaks to you about his neighbour disparagingly, but rather say to him: ‘Stop, brother! I fall into graver sins every day, so how can I criticize him?’ In this way you will achieve two things: you will heal yourself and your neighbour with one plaster. This is one of the shortest ways to the forgiveness of sins; I mean, not to judge. ‘Judge not, that you be not judged.’" - THE LADDER OF DIVINE ASCENT, St. John Climacus, Step 10 - On slander or calumny

01:13:35 Kathleen: Haha

01:14:27 Maureen Cunningham: Praying for you when do we start fast

01:15:30 Niño: Grateful always to be part of this group 🙏 thank you Padre For making this platform public(what I mean free)

01:15:40 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:15:41 Bob Cihak: Thank you, father.

01:15:42 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:15:50 Adam Paige: Replying to "Praying for you when..."

Praying for you when do we start fast depends on your rite !

01:16:06 Kathleen: I have no books yet. Is this info on your website?

01:16:15 Niño: Pls pray for me ..I'm planning to go back to the sacrament of penance after a long time of being away 🥹

01:16:22 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Pls pray for me ..I'..." with 😇

01:16:26 Josh: Reacted to "Pls pray for me ..I'..." with ❤️

01:16:26 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Pls pray for me ..I'..." with 🙏🏼

01:16:29 Suzanne Romano: Reacted to Pls pray for me ..I'... with "🙏🏼"

01:16:39 Kathleen: Hahaha

01:16:44 Niño: Reacted to Hahaha with "😂"

01:17:05 Francisco Ingham: Thank you father! Let’s all offer our prayers and fasts for the Pope this week 🙏

01:17:14 sr charista: what is the name again

01:17:45 Adam Paige: I have no books yet. Is this info on your website? https://www.ctosonline.org/patristic/EvCT.html

01:18:10 Anthony: Reacted to When I decided, a lo... with "👍"

01:18:26 Adam Paige: I have no books yet. Is this info on your website? https://www.bostonmonks.com/product_info.php/products_id/635/?srsltid=AfmBOooAjdCUbwFztCJTIdrREtqfZwwp9RRgofV0q8U344Uov_z8_8q5

01:18:28 sr charista: Replying to "I have no books yet...."

thank you much :)

01:18:46 sr charista: BEAUTIFUL

01:18:46 Nypaver Clan: zacharias zacharou

We come to the end of this journey with St John Climacus knowing that it is also only the beginning. What joy has come through sitting at the feet of St. John for these few years and to be led along the path that brings us to Christ and the freedom to give ourselves in love and receive love. 

In these final paragraphs about the qualities and the responsibilities of a spiritual elder, what shines forth most brightly is the absolute and complete love that the elder must have for those in his care. The love of Christ that burns within his heart must embrace and give warmth to all those he guides and be a true source of light for them. There are times where he may have to be strict and forceful yet the love dwells within his heart, like divine love, is curative not punitive. Divine love offers itself completely, lavishly, allowing itself to be broken and poured out for others. Thus, the elder must have ever before him those in his charge; so much so that purity of heart allows him to see their needs and suffering and compels him to come to their aid. 

There will be many times when he must carry those in his charge to the Lord through his own example, his hidden sufferings and constant prayer. Like a parent, there will be moments when he must take them by the hand and guide them one step at a time along the narrow path that leads to the kingdom. Despite the fact that the kingdom of heaven dwells within us, the journey is often toilsome.  Left to ourselves, we may never find the narrow gate or enter. 

The elder must be long suffering; that when the lack of dispassion in others pierces his heart like a sword his response is like the Divine Judge - restraining himself and looking at others only with compassion. He must be willing to receive and take up upon his shoulders of the burden of his office as Christ took upon himself the burden of the cross and he must not despise the wounds that may come through rejection and betrayal.

The elder’s love must run so deep that intuitively he knows the sufferings of those in his care even before they speak of them to him. Without hesitation and quickly, he seeks to apply the healing balm. 

And perhaps most powerful and beautiful of all - - in the end, the elder must acknowledge that he must decrease in order that Christ might increase within his children’s hearts. There will come a time when they no longer need human instruction because they have given their hearts to the Lord and are guided by His Spirit. Blessed are those who bring others to Christ and whose guidance passes on from generation to generation.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:12:41 Bob Cihak: P. 260, # 89

00:17:46 Anna Lalonde: It was a complete blessing the four months I was in religious life! Transformed my prayer life.

00:19:12 Joanne Martínez : Joanne Martínez here, just signed on

00:19:55 Bob Cihak: P. 260, # 89

00:20:13 Joanne Martínez : Reacted to "P. 260, # 89" with 👌

00:31:14 Kate : In order to be broken and poured out in love for others, does it necessitate allowing ourselves to be broken first by God, so to speak, and to have received the Love of God poured into us?

00:31:58 Rebecca Thérèse: Nathan

00:32:59 Jeffrey Ott: The daily meditation of Gaston Courtois was on that very thing…profiting first from God’s love so that we may reveal that love to the multitude of other souls

00:33:58 Tracey Fredman: Sometimes willingly pouring ourselves out for others is the way we are broken by God, particularly when we don't feel like doing whatever it is for others whether in ministry or simply serving another.

00:44:53 Joanne Martínez : In reading about the lengths to which the people of Mesoamerica went to receive baptism after the apparition of Guadalupe, I have a new understanding of the gift that sacrament truly is

00:57:21 Maureen Cunningham: There is a short you tube called  The 21 remembering Martyrs who died in February 2015. The faith of  these men  was moving

01:01:58 Anna Lalonde: Fostered about 130 teens. 😂

01:22:16 Sr. Mary Clare: That is certainly a love that is not possessive

01:22:58 Joanne Martínez : Thank you! These last two years journeying with you all has been extraordinary.

01:23:02 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You Father

01:23:55 Zachary Morgan: This was wonderful - thank you Abouna!

01:24:37 Sr. Mary Clare: Beautiful

01:24:40 Janine: Thank you Father Charbel…looking forward to St Isaac

01:24:43 Jeffrey Ott: It’s been a joy. Thank you Father.

01:24:52 Lee Graham: Thank you, this has been wonderful

01:25:42 ANDREW ADAMS: Thanks be to God! Thank you, Father!

01:25:45 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:25:45 David: Thank you Father God Bless you and your Mom!

01:25:58 Art: Thank you for this wonderful journey with John Climacus!

01:26:08 Cindy Moran: Than you Father

Tonight we follow the thought of Saint Isaiah, the Solitary and St. John Cassian on the struggle with the passion of lust and fornication. One things stands out clearly: we must be fully engaged in the formation of the mind and the heart in virtue - for the devil is fully engaged in seeking to provoke us to sin. Therefore, we must guard all of the senses with great attentiveness. With this particular passion, we must engage in the battle both physically and spiritually. Thus, we must be attentive to both prayer and fasting; that is, humbling the mind and the body in such a way that we turn to God for our nourishment and strength. In shaping the habit of virtue, we must study the scriptures, engage in fervent prayer, and labor with our hands; in other words, we must keep our focus simple in order that we might be aware of what is going on within the heart. 

Cassian makes it clear that the heart is the place where the disease is hidden – the depths of the soul. Yet, it is also here that the remedy is found. We must open our heart fully to God by guarding the senses and directing all of our energies towards the formation of virtue and the love of the things of the kingdom. 

Humility is the foundation of all of these pursuits. In it, we recognize our poverty and so cling to God. As we cling to him, we experienced that he alone can bring not only healing where there has only been sin but also fill the heart with the love that he alone can satisfy.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:02:12 Anna Lalonde: Hello! We missed last week due to sickness. Glad to hear Father Charbel you've gained 11 new brothers in the monastery!

00:20:51 Joseph Muir: What page are we on?

00:21:07 Bob Cihak: P. 207 E

00:22:00 Joseph Muir: Reacted to "P. 207 E" with 👍

00:27:58 Joseph Muir: After a period of my life of living in rampant sin, upon my reversion, returning to the sacramental life of prayer and repentance, I really struggled with talking about my past without ultimately devolving into my bragging about my past. This was something that I took to confession probably every week for a period, until the priest, whom I personally knew, eventually asked me, “Are these people asking to hear about your past? Or are you shoehorning it into conversation?” It was obviously the latter, stemming from a misplaced sense of zeal for my return to God, though the priest exhorted me to practice biting my tongue instead, and that it would afford me the silence so as to healthily discern when and whom to share certain bits regarding my past, if at all

00:30:59 Joseph Muir: 😂

00:31:56 Anthony: I recommend "Hope," Pope Francis ' memoiore released this year.

00:32:16 Anthony: He deals with his own shame

00:35:25 Anthony: Ossuary

00:36:08 Myles Davidson: There’s a great scene in a Mt. Athos doco of a monk moving a wheelbarrow full of skulls to a new home they were building for them

00:37:48 Joseph Muir: “Keep your eyes on your own plate”, as an old monastic maxim goes

00:49:14 Adam Paige: https://philokalia.podbean.com/e/to-love-fasting/

00:49:33 Anthony: There's a related issue: I was working with a church youth group, and so, wanting to relate to their culture as other adults could, I watched a lot of movies like the Marvel Universe.  That was a bad idea.  That just uploads other people's malformed imagination into mine.

00:50:57 Myles Davidson: Replying to "There's a related is..."

Hollywood in general is very toxic

01:05:54 Niño: It's really hard to practice these disciplines especially if someone experimented with living a life of sin out of curiosity... I'd been away from the sacraments for 2 months to satisfy my lower appetite...but now I regret everything ...it's a foolish thing to give a chance to the devil in the name of "choosing" between evil and good ... Now, I'm beginning from zero again 😔 it's good thing to find this meeting.thanks Fr.

01:06:22 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "It's really hard to ..." with 🙏

01:08:09 Myles Davidson: Oscar Wilde said the best way to get rid of temptation was to give in to it

01:08:16 Forrest Cavalier: Welcome back to the fold, N!

01:08:26 Joseph Muir: “[E]ach person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin; and sin when it is full-grown brings forth death.”—James 1:14-15

01:09:05 Adam Paige: Oscar Wilde also said the only feast of the church he kept was Septuagesima haha

01:09:18 Anthony: Mayne Wilde meant that temptation is a part of life, don't just roll over to temptation and play dead

01:09:41 Julie: Like Eve who had a dialogue with the devil

01:10:13 Cameron Jackson: Oscar Wilde is a contrary indicator.

01:15:23 Cameron Jackson: Thank you Fr Charbel!

01:15:31 Niño: Replying to "Welcome back to the ..." 

 I don't know...but, deep within me and every event that took place these past few days is like a deep calling from God to return ..I don't know and I'm not sure

It seems to be overreacting for me ..but, the events really are clear to me that God is calling me back

I know how to return..but I don't know if I am really sincere in my conversion 

How will I know that I am really sincere ...one of my concerns is that I only have the feeling to return because of guilt but really deep inside me I am not repentant ...I cannot abuse the Mercy of God 

I am sure of the Mercy of God but not sure about myself ..pls pray for me

01:15:42 sr charista: Blessings to you Fr.! Thank you :).

01:15:55 Jacqulyn: Pray for me! Tomorrow is my birthday! 🎉

01:16:07 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:16:11 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:16:15 Aric B: Thank you Father!

01:16:16 Forrest Cavalier: Replying to "Welcome back to the ..."

Go to confession!

01:16:20 Laura: Replying to "Welcome back to the ..."

👍🏼

01:16:22 Bob Cihak: God be with you.

01:16:27 Laura: Reacted to "I don't know...but, ..." with 👍🏼

St. John does not hesitate to speak to us about the beauty and the extraordinary responsibility of the spiritual elder. To find oneself with the care of souls one must take up the work without question. One cannot approach the care of the flock as a hireling. As we have received so we must give. If God has given us the particular gifts to guide others in the spiritual life, then gratitude must compel us to offer the same consolation to others. 

One cannot stress enough how great the responsibility is that is placed on the shoulders of the elder. He must be especially sensitive to the most vulnerable and the weakest within the community and understand how to offer guidance to multiple individuals at the same time. He must be able to strengthen the resolve of all the men in his community through timely rebukes and humbling the stronger members of the community even though their actions do not warrant such correction. An elder cannot set aside his identity, even while always seeking to be tender and gentle with those in his care. They must respect him and his life must be respectable in regard to his virtue if they are going to follow his counsel and if they are going to remain obedient. Only in this way will his monks have absolute confidence in his guidance. 

He must hold their trust by also holding everything they say as private and not to be shared among others. Such trust is hard won and can be lost in an instant if the elder acts indiscriminately. While he is forbearing, he must deal directly with the disobedient. His failure to do so may, in the end, weaken their commitment or cause them to despise him when they are unable to endure.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:09:32 Adam Paige: https://youtu.be/0uBTKGd3L_g?si=1t1YtY9_ACx02Pd7

00:10:54 Suzanne Romano: Thank you, Adam! That's it!

00:11:44 Zachary Morgan: I love your substack!!

00:12:04 Jacqulyn: Reacted to "I love your substack..." with 👍

00:12:20 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Thank you, Adam! Tha…" with 📽

00:12:33 Una: Reacted to "I love your substa..." with 👍

00:13:44 Zachary Morgan: I find that substack is more for other writers/contributors outside the now-prevalent "shorts" we see on other platforms

00:33:49 Anthony: I think this is helpful.  When I'd read something like Desert Fathers and come across confessing thoughts, I thought it was literal.

00:53:50 Zachary Morgan: Speaking of openly wearing clerical garb, one of the biggest arguments that I have experienced among clergy is whether deacons should wear their clerics openly because not being a priest, they shoudn't be seen in "spiritual way" in public or be confused as potentially being a priest by others - almost as if the Deacon cannot be a source of spiritual good outside the service of the altar.  Can I ask what your thoughts are on this?  I think it is much more of a Western struggle.

00:58:25 Margaret: Thank you for your comments on Priests and Sisters wearing their clerical garb in public. I bristle when I see sisters that aren't in "clerical garb". It makes me think they are ashamed to be Brides of Christ

00:59:47 Suzanne Romano: It's not rigidity. It's zeal and lov ae.

01:02:05 Sr. Mary Clare: When I walked into a store with another sister, two Protestants said, "What a breath of fresh air to see Catholic Sisters wearing their long garb. We have seen them running down the street in shorts. We just smiled.

01:02:18 Suzanne Romano: All your comments on wearing the habit are spot on!

01:03:23 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "All your comments on..." with 🥰

01:03:49 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "When I walked into a..." with 👍🏼

01:04:09 Suzanne Romano: Reacted to When I walked into a... with "👍🏼"

01:07:38 Sr. Mary Clare: Why "Fear in our presence?"

01:09:53 Sr. Mary Clare: Thank you for explaining. I was a little confused

01:12:40 Sr. Mary Clare: Absolutely correct!

01:14:00 Suzanne Romano: Love cannot be divided from authority. Love requires authority.

01:20:16 Una: Reacted to "When I walked into..." with 👍🏼

01:20:20 Maureen Cunningham: Thank you Father

01:21:03 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:21:05 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:21:15 Margaret: Thank you!

01:21:46 Jeffrey Ott: Thank you! Great to be with you all!

The spiritual life is not lived out in the abstract. Among the fathers, we find a distinct emphasis on praxis; that is, the practice of the faith. We come to know God and to love virtue not through reading but rather through experience. 

As a defense, often used to hold onto attachments, we make our faith into something that is purely intellectual or notional. Yet in this hypothesis, hearing tonight in particular from Saint Ephraim, the Syrian, we are presented with the experience of those tempted by the demons to minimize the effects of the embrace of sin and the loss of grace. Rather than holding onto our virtue as precious and maintaining a clear vision of our identity as temples of the Holy Spirit, we cast it all aside thoughtlessly for a moment of pleasure.

The struggle with sensuality in particular is challenging because of how it is experienced. We covet what we see and when something is seen it is held within the imagination and the memory. It remains with us even if for a moment we are drawn away from it. When we indiscriminately expose ourselves to what stimulates the passions, we make ourselves more vulnerable. Once the demons have been successful in leading us to embrace such thoughts and actions, then the images seep into the unconscious and emerge later in our dreams.

The loss that comes to us is immeasurable, and it is only by the grace of God that healing can come. Saint Ephraim counsels us to keep our eyes downward in their focus and not allow our vision to rove around indiscriminately. On the other hand, we must keep the eyes of our soul constantly turned upward toward God. Only when He fills us with his grace when we turned to him in a spirit of repentance can the imagination, memory and unconscious be healed. The more we fill our hearts with the love of virtue and the things of the kingdom the more we are transformed and begin to experience, once again, the freedom of those who have been made sons and daughters of God.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:12:48 Suzanne Romano: It's certainly been a bad flu season for the chickens... 🥴

00:15:35 paul g.: Whoa. Great !

00:31:28 Forrest Cavalier: Priests can be more firm at setting limits. My wife was confirmed in the 1980's only because Fr. Vanyo at the cathedral refused to baptize her youngest sibling unless all were in catechism. I pray for him often.

00:32:11 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Priests can be more ..." with 👍🏼

00:41:59 Mary and Al: Yes scary!

00:55:13 Forrest Cavalier: That reference to wax in this paragraph sounds like a reference to Ps 68:3 "As wax melteth before the fire, so let the wicked perish at the presence of God"

01:03:23 Sheila: I find this holds the same when people tell you gossip about others. It changes how you see the person whether you wanted tonor not.

01:03:29 Sheila: Or not

01:05:13 Sheila: These images, can they be purged? Or are they truly as you say permamently there to be used against yourr charity and thoughts?

01:17:06 Lee Graham: The many “good” things we could do are enemy of the “best”.

01:22:45 paul g.: Yes

01:23:00 Forrest Cavalier: everge Teen o's

01:23:08 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "everge Teen o's" with 😂

01:23:10 paul g.: Reacted to "everge Teen o's" with ❤️

01:23:56 Bob Cihak, AZ: Preach it, Father!! Please! and Thank you!!!

01:23:59 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:24:14 Sheila: Thanks Father!

01:24:16 Forrest Cavalier: No fasting this week, though!

01:24:23 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father.

I was struck this evening not only with the wisdom of St. John’s counsel in regard to the care of souls, but also the beauty of the heart of the Shepherd that emerges as we read through the text. Only a heart that has been conformed to Christ and a life that in every way has become prophetic in the sense of bearing witness to the love, humility, and obedience of the kingdom can give itself over to the care of other souls. The role of an elder is not simply to instruct, reprove and guide but above all to love. His affection for those in his care as well as for all people must lead him to console others as he himself has been consoled. He approaches this reality not with a spirit of condescension but rather as one who has been humbled by life and his own poverty and lifted up by the mercy of Christ. It is a spirit of gratitude that leads him to enter into the struggle of others with a spirit of generosity. He feels no revulsion at the sight of sin or weakness. Rather, it draws his attention and draws forth from his heart, compassion and mercy. 

One of the most striking things we considered this evening was the nature of obedience. St. John tells us that it is the very definition of obedience to be fearless and to have no anxiety about anything at all. The truly obedient heart of an elder can calmly guide, direct, and comfort others without saying a single word.

It is this reality that we are to embody in our lives; whether priest, religious, married or single. The best and the beautiful are meant for all and that which comes to us from the hand of our Lord must be freely extended to others. Thus, to have the care of souls is part of the very nature of Christian life.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:08:38 Bob Cihak: P. 257, # 64

00:15:03 Wayne: The idea of repentance is the major focus of the Eastern practise.

00:21:51 Myles Davidson: "Flee from discussions of dogma as from an unruly lion" St. Isaac the Syrian

00:23:43 Bob Cihak: Reacted to ""Flee from discussio..." with 👍

00:31:34 Daniel Allen: That’s the best definition I’ve ever heard of obedience. Applicable even to mundane things, unafraid of the death of the ego in order to obey on a whim.

00:32:00 David: Obedience is often faith and humbling of the intellect. What one believes can be based on feelings what one knows is very little

00:33:06 Anthony: An acquaintance told me theology is or should be like chemistry: predictable,  according to something like law.   I think it's more like cooking: the artful and beautiful and surprising use of "chemistry" without necessarily "knowing" the "rules" in depth.

00:36:58 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: I often find myself rejoicing as I do physical labor that because of my religious vows/dedicated life, even cleaning offers worship to God!

00:37:39 Suzanne Romano: Reacted to I often find myself ... with "❤️"

00:40:19 David: Reacted to "I often find myself ..." with 👍

00:41:48 Rebecca Thérèse: Reacted to "I often find myself ..." with 👍

00:42:10 Lee Graham: Reacted to "I often find myself …" with ❤️

00:44:44 Thomas Dilts: For me, Brother Lawrence best demonstrated day to day labors as service to God.

00:50:21 St. Stanislaus Kostka Religious Education: St. Andre Bessette...sickly and poor, orphaned and seemingly of a lower intellect

00:53:21 Adam Paige: All the T’s are pronounced in Bessette

00:53:30 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "All the T’s are pron..." with 👍🏼

00:53:37 Anthony: It maybe would be good to have a "Sons / Daughters of the Covenant" arrangement of single people to live within and among parishes.

00:54:44 Adam Paige: Pronounced like “buh-set”. We call him Saint Brother André locally (I live a 40 minutes walk from his tomb)

00:59:35 Anthony: In the Gospel,  Jesus told a demonic Not to be a "traditional disciple" but sent him on his own mission among his peopl.

01:00:43 David: A convent I used to visit in Tlaxcala Mexico used to put a mirror in every room and waited till anyone that came asked for it to be removed as a sign they were ready to actually leave vanity and focus on Christ.  I was really stuck by something that simple being used with novices.

01:03:39 Bob Cihak: Be careful about mud huts. My father was born in one. My uncle Frank lived in a mud hut when he got his own lad to farm. When he married, he built and outhouse so that his new wife wouldn't have to go to nature to do those natural things.

01:09:52 paul g.: My birthday is Feb 4th too😊.

01:10:13 Suzanne Romano: I was baptized on Feb 4!

01:10:20 Francisco Ingham: We love you Father

01:10:25 Anthony: ❤️

01:10:28 Francisco Ingham: You are the absolute best

01:11:11 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:11:17 Jeffrey Ott: Thank you! Great to be with you all

01:11:21 David: Bless you father and your Mom!

01:11:21 Mary Clare Wax: thank you

01:11:28 David: Thank you

01:11:29 Art iPhone: Welcome all

The struggle with impurity and fornication in our day is so fierce - as well as accepted and embraced by most of the secular culture - that those seeking purity of heart not only have to engage in the ascetic life deeply but also have to embrace a living martyrdom. 

The fathers understood how powerful our natural desires can be; in particular our sensuality. They also understood the devil‘s machinations and the relentless nature of temptations that also come to us  from our own imagination and memory. What is captured for us in the writings of this hypothesis is the necessity of engaging in the spiritual battle. We must of course cling to the grace of God and engage in constant prayer. Yet knowing the devil‘s actions, we must embrace many different remedies; such as doing violence to the self and depriving ourselves of the things that the culture freely embraces.  

What we heard tonight from multiple writers is the need to remember our own mortality. What we behold as beautiful and covet with the eyes quickly turns to dust. With salvation in the balance, the devil can often tempt us to give ourselves over to satisfying a passion “just once” - as if that would resolve our need. We have to understand that desire does not work in that fashion. The more that it is fed the more its longings increase. 

If we could only understand this in light of our desire for God! The more that we desire him in love, the more that we pursue him through prayer, the greater our longing becomes. Soon our attachment to lesser things begins to diminish and we are freer to pursue the Beloved. 

Finally, we are encouraged to look to the heroes of our faith; in particular those who wage war against this particular passion or who made the ultimate sacrifice to protect their purity. In them, we see those whose hearts belong to the Lord and to Him alone. May God give us the grace to imitate them.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:03:25 Tracey Fredman: I apologize if I'm in and out this evening. I'm on call for work and may need to in/out.

00:13:39 Anthony: Well, some of the women were looking for a female take on 6th commandment concerns...here is a lead...

00:13:56 Bob Cihak: P. 202, top of page

00:24:32 Lee Graham: Brother Sun and Sister Moon

00:24:46 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Brother Sun and Sist..." with 👍🏼

00:26:50 Anthony: This reminds me of an apocryphal story that after Adam and Eve sinned, they withdrew from each other for the sake of doing penance. They had the right to each other, but living a time of repentance is withdrawing from comfort - which is what vowed religious have chosen. 

00:31:26 Forrest Cavalier: Father, I am wondering how to see this advice to control the imagination to see horrible things as being honest and pure of heart. I understand how it can be effective, but it seems to be contrary to reality and second, to rely on willpower, which is less admirable than a more excellent submission to grace, (as previous warnings we have read recently here.)

00:41:07 Una: The Buddhists have a meditation on rotting corpses too.

00:48:51 Kathleen: Interestingly Sirach 11:27-28 speaks about how death brings full understanding of one’s life

00:53:57 Anthony: Thomas Sowell wrote about the violent, irreverent character of the Scots and English Colonists in the South during the time of the American colonies.  They have left their mark on American character and culture.  There's an audiobook version of his book on YouTube where I heard it.

00:54:19 paul g.: Reacted to "Thomas Sowell wrote …" with ✔️

00:56:53 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "Thomas Sowell wrote ..." with 🥰

00:57:35 Nypaver Clan: Replying to "Thomas Sowell wrote ..."

Thomas Sowell is so gifted!

00:58:03 Bob Cihak: Replying to "Thomas Sowell wrote ..."

Amen.

00:58:03 Anthony: Replying to "Thomas Sowell wrote ..." 

 I should clarify Sowell was talking about places like the Ozarks, that prioritized excessive pride and vendettas.

00:58:24 Jacqulyn: Reacted to "Thomas Sowell is so ..." with 👍

00:59:17 Nypaver Clan: Replying to "Thomas Sowell wrote ..."

👍🏼

01:09:58 iPhone (61): Thank You Father Blessings

01:10:27 Sr. Charista Maria: Thank you dear Fr. Abernethy!

01:10:39 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:10:41 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:10:46 Kathleen: Thank you

01:11:02 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father

01:13:03 Kathleen: Hahaha

01:14:04 iPhone (61): Beautiful Icon

01:15:22 iPhone (61): Who is Saint Catherine

01:16:38 Suzanne Romano: Replying to "Who is Saint Catheri..." 

 https://catholicharboroffaithandmorals.com/St.%20Catherine%20of%20Alexandria.html

01:16:47 Anthony: Replying to "Who is Saint Catheri..." 

 An Egyptian philosopher whi also found Christ, decided to be a consecrated virgin.  Virginity angered pagans and they tortured her on a wheel, to death.

01:16:51 Forrest Cavalier: Great story! Thank you!

01:17:07 Suzanne Romano: Replying to "Who is Saint Catheri..." 

 She's beyond the pale awesome!

The counsel and the guidance that St. John offers in this letter is unparalleled. His understanding of the role of the spiritual elder and the nature and manner of engaging those in his responsibility is deep and astute, both psychologically and spiritually. Yet what stands out the most in this letter is the dynamic that must exist between the spiritual elder and those in his care. The Abbot or the elder could never be described as an administrator or a master platoon leader in the military. Simply put, he is to be an embodiment of Christ to those in his care, being willing to lay down his life on their behalf. It is crucified love that saves and redeems us, and it is the same love that must guide the words and actions of one who has been given the responsibility for the care of others. What drives the heart of such an elder is the understanding of the care that he himself has been given, the consolation that God has offered to him. These realities move him to share what he himself has received an abundance. In fact to fail to do so is a reflection of a lack of charity as well as gratitude. By nature, a spiritual elder longs to help those in his care to avoid the pitfalls that the Evil One places before them in the spiritual life. He must be sensitive to the most subtle movements among the members of his community and the spirit that is manifesting itself among them.  Likewise, driven by love he must foster a sense of generosity between the members of the community and those in his care. He cannot allow himself the luxury of treating everyone the same - any more than a parent addresses the needs of their children in a mechanical fashion. St. John tells us “the overseers must heed to the sowing of the seed: to the season, person, quality, and quantity.” The elder must nurture and nourish as need demands. And finally, the one who does this in the fullest measure acts in a hidden fashion so that all glory and gratitude is directed toward God.  May God give us such faithful shepherds!

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:10:09 Suzanne Romano: I just this minute received word that Bishop Richard Williamson passed away this evening. Please pray for his immortal soul.

00:10:54 Anna Lalonde: Are you moving there?

00:11:06 Anna Lalonde: In California

00:11:23 Anna Lalonde: Awesome

00:16:20 David: One thing I like about my Dad who keeps a saying from my Grandfather is when someone says thank you. He always says No thank God I am able. A small detail but I have come to appreciate it more with age and now do the same

00:23:04 Zachary Morgan: alhamdulilah!

00:39:34 Anthony: This relationship of shepherd to sheep reminds me of the "royal priesthood" described by St Ephrem in The Cave of Treasures.  Adam and his successor priest-kings on the mount of paradise took the care of all the faithful in their hands....until the numbers of faithful dwelling on the mountain dwindled, going into the plain and mingling with Cain's people.....and then God sent the Flood.

00:40:09 David: When I taught at a catholic school in Spain one of my mentors used to say there two types of teachers: One that seeks control and power and the other is one who learns more than the students about himself and faith.

00:51:50 Joseph Muir: For those who don’t have the book, the two quotes at the end of the last paragraph come from the prophets Jeremiah and Obadiah, respectively

00:54:57 Nypaver Clan: Reacted to "For those who don’t ..." with 👍🏼

01:10:47 Anthony: That was the training at my Evangelical university. It's hard to break.

01:10:52 David: It's interesting you look at the early church and people were attracted by love. No where does it say a great Proof or having the best arguement, theology or put people in their place

01:12:11 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You Father Blessing

01:12:46 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:12:54 Zachary Morgan: Thank you Abouna!

01:13:02 Jeffrey Ott: Thank you! Great to be with you all.

01:13:19 Francisco Ingham: Thank you father!! I hope I can go visit the monastery some day 🙏

01:13:22 David: Thank you father and blessings to you and your Mom

01:13:27 Art: Thank you Father!

We have continued our discussion of the farhers’ writing on fornication and the effects that it has upon the soul. Purity of heart is the foundation of the spiritual life and the immediate goal. We are called to remove every impediment that prevents us from not only receiving the grace of God but from offering him our hearts and our love fully. 

In fact, our hearts can be divided, and this is exactly what the demons seek to accomplish. They know they have a strong bodily appetite and desire that they can stir up through our thoughts and images, words and the actions, and the presence of others. Even memories of conversations and the images of people from the past can be used against us in more vulnerable moments to lead us astray.

Holiness and purity is not something that one can judge from external realities. Even the most holy individual who seems to be most endowed with gifts from God can have a heart that is radically divided and even wholly given over to the spirit of fornication. To lack watchfulness in this regard opens one up to the experience of obsession. It does not take more than one instance of infidelity to open the door to taking another step in that direction where obsession can become oppression. Fornication can take hold of the mind and the heart with a fierce grip. Finally oppression can give way to possession where the demon of fornication takes hold of one’s life and darkens their heart completely. 

Disconnected from the wisdom of the father’s we find the counsel of our day much akin to self-help.  Such counsel sad leads a person more deeply into the obsession that wounds them. Under the false guise of prudence and wisdom there’s often deep foolishness that leads an individual to put himself and God to the test. The discipline and watchfulness the father‘s put forward would often be dismissed in our day as scrupulosity or unhealthy. Yet the Saints knew and understood what is precious and what must be protected. Unless one loves virtue and has tasted the sweetness that it brings to one’s life one will easily walk away from it.

I might hazard to say that very few of our generation know the kind of purity of heart of which the fathers speak and to which we are called. Our culture has become so permeated with disordered sensuality that our love for the virtue of purity has been compromised as well as our capacity to pursue it. Only radical humility and clinging to the grace of God can aid us.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:04:28 Sr. Charista Maria: Fr. what community?

00:05:24 ANDREW ADAMS: Replying to "Fr. what community?"

https://www.monksofmttabor.com

00:41:37 Rachel: I think this is very important. fwiw not scrupulous at all

00:42:23 Myles Davidson: Replying to "I think this is very..."

I agree

00:44:16 Mary Clare Wax: Very well said! Thank you!

00:44:33 Forrest Cavalier: Attributed to St Alphonsus: “To avoid the sight of dangerous objects, the saints were accustomed to keep their eyes almost continually fixed on the earth, and to abstain even from looking at innocent objects,” says St. Alphonsus de Liguori.

00:45:35 Forrest Cavalier: There are many times I need to do this, in Sheetz. Or Walmart. Or wherever

00:53:34 Una: What exactly does she mean by prudent? Is there another word?

00:55:21 Forrest Cavalier: Greek is σωφροσύνην

00:55:37 Forrest Cavalier: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sophrosyne

00:58:16 Una: What would the nuns have been leaving the convent for? Shopping? Visiting?

01:00:42 Una: One priest told me that in seminary he was advised to visit his family regularly to protect temptations against chastity

01:00:56 Una: To avoid too much lonliness

01:01:31 Sr. Charista Maria: Father I would like your thoughts if you are familiar with the story of Bishop Nonnis in the book: Harlots of the Desert, by Benedicta Ward? She shares of the beauty of the Harlot Pelagia, and Bishop Nonnis was so struck by her beauty that it led him to pray for her, and she converted. I happened to just read this on the Feast of St. Anthony.

01:03:07 Mary Clare Wax: Reacted to "Father I would like ..." with 👍

01:03:43 Una: I'm reading Harlots of the Desert too!

01:03:52 Una: One potato chip, yeah

01:04:25 Sr. Charista Maria: Reacted to "I'm reading Harlots ..." with 👏

01:05:01 Una: Today's gospel was about not dividing the Kingdom. A kingdom divided against itself cannot stand

01:06:19 Mary Clare Wax: The other clergy turned their eyes away from Pelagia, but Bishop Nonnis looked at her with love.

01:07:24 Anna Lalonde: Seeking prayers... Incense is gravely affecting my health after BioLab chemical fire exposure in September.

01:13:09 Sr. Charista Maria: Father I love your sharing on "oh I just want to watch a movie" or the like. It is so important to recognize the weaknesses of the flesh in order to be on guard against them when they surface.

01:14:46 Una: Or going to movies often

01:14:58 Sr. Charista Maria: Agreed regarding not escaping into family visits. It is such a grace to invite Jesus into the loneliness

01:15:43 Mary Clare Wax: Such jewels from the desert Fathers!

01:15:49 santiagobua: Thank you Father!!

01:15:51 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:15:52 Rachel: Thank you

01:15:52 Josh: Thanks father

01:16:16 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father

The deeper that we go into this letter, the more we begin to see the necessary qualities of an elder. In our society, we often value what seems to be productive. Yet what St. John emphasizes is the heart of the elder. One cannot offer care to another soul unless they have struggled long and hard with their own passions and are able to look at those who come to them through the lens of compassion, humility, and the love of Christ. 

Repeatedly, we are shown the care that the elder must exhibit in his approach to those who come to him. He cannot be easily agitated when anger or hostility are directed toward him. Nor can he show disgust at the past or present behavior of another. He does not condescend, but rather makes himself the servant of one like himself – one who knows the deep wounds of sin; often wounds that are self inflicted. 

Therefore, John tells us it is not right for a lion to pasture sheep, and it is not safe for a man who is still subject to the passions to rule over passionate men. One who does not seek to tend to the wounded, but rather to rule - one who does not seek to lead by example, but rather instruct with force - is going to be a gross distortion of the image of Christ.

The elder must have the greatest sensitivity to the needs and the struggles of those who come to him, realizing that there is great variety and difference between individuals. Thus, an elder must be the most obedient and humble of souls; that is, he must have a refined ability to hear the truth, to hear the word of God spoken in his heart, and he must possess discernment that is born of humility. An elder can only see in others what he has contemplated in himself. 

His awareness of the wounds that others bear only help him to understand that they are his responsibility. He approaches others not in a detached fashion, but as one who shares deeply in their sorrow and desires their healing as he desires his own. In this, St. John tells us Christ is the standard. The elder must receive all that is thrust upon him with the same selfless love that we witness on the cross. It is here that we begin to understand that John is not simply speaking about monks. He speaks to all of us and the necessity of taking Christ at his word; to love others as he has loved us, to be willing to lay down our lives for others, including those who treat us like enemies.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:09:11 Anna Lalonde: Pray because I was just anointed. Been not well since late Sept.

00:10:02 Janine: Yes Anna…I will pray for you!

00:10:09 Bob Cihak, AZ: Replying to "Pray because I was j..."

Will do. God bless you.

00:10:50 Rebecca Thérèse: Reacted to "Pray because I was j..." with 🙏

00:11:18 Suzanne Romano: Happy Feast of St
 Paul, Proto Hermit!!!

00:12:50 Anna Lalonde: What's your special day Father?

00:13:09 Tracey Fredman: Reacted to "Pray because I was j..." with 🙏

00:13:53 Anna Lalonde: Yes a BioLab Chemical Fire happened Sept 30. That caused me life threatening health issues in my lungs. So thanks for prayers.

00:14:12 Anna Lalonde: Congratulations!

00:15:16 Suzanne Romano: Maybe St. Paul is responsible for your love of the Desert Fathers! 😇

00:15:18 Bob Cihak, AZ: P. 254, # 44

00:16:16 Eric Ewanco: what step are we on, and what's the lede to the paragraph?

00:16:38 Myles Davidson: Replying to "what step are we on,..."

P. 254, # 44

00:16:50 Eric Ewanco: Replying to "what step are we on,..."

I don't have that book.

00:18:05 Bob Cihak, AZ: Replying to "what step are we on,..."

Lede: Let the established order...

00:18:38 Bob Cihak, AZ: Replying to "what step are we on,..."

of To the Shepherd

00:32:28 Anthony: Gamal Nasser?

00:32:50 Art: Edi Amin?

00:32:50 Myles Davidson: Mubarak?

00:33:03 Adam Paige: Hosni Mubarak ?

00:34:08 Adam Paige: The Life of Repentance and Purity (Pope Shenouda) pdf http://stphilopateerdallas.org/The%20Life%20of%20Repentance%20and%20Purity%20-%20HH%20Pope%20Shenouda%20III.pdf

00:41:23 David: Without detachment of the world we cannot even glimpse heaven.

00:42:01 David: I can't remember the saint that said that but when I looked for a spiritual director someone told me look for detachments first.

00:58:40 David: I love the saying of Mother Teresa- We are all pencils in the hand of God.

01:05:08 David: I have on my bedroom door a saying Fr. George Maloney had which is really hard to practice every day- In loving one another God in us is made flesh. I try to keep this in mind but as the day goes on I sometimes get lost.

01:06:11 Daniel Allen: Terrifying thought… what if instead of the explanations we give or hear to make the gospel more approachable, what if Christ meant the things He said? That’s the most terrifying thought because who really has embodied that? And yet that’s what we’re called to.

01:09:20 Anna Lalonde: Reacted to Terrifying thought… ... with "❤️"

01:11:24 Eric Ewanco: yes

01:15:00 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you. Have a good retreat🙂🙏

01:15:46 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father! Have a good time with the monks!

01:15:48 MOME hermits: Excellent!!!!

01:15:52 Suzanne Romano: Thank you!

01:16:14 Anna Lalonde: Yes

01:16:16 David: Thank you very much Father. Isaac is worth the wait

01:16:19 Vanessa: i'm fine with that

01:16:21 Jeff O.: happy to finish this!

01:16:22 Lori Hatala: yes comtinue

01:16:23 MOME hermits: Continue

01:16:26 David: Not in our time but God's Time

01:16:27 Janine: Yes…continue with it..

01:16:28 Art: I’m fine with that.

01:16:29 ANDREW ADAMS: I’m good with whatever the group prefers.

01:16:33 Kate : Please continue!

01:16:40 Eric Ewanco: I'm fine finishing it FWIW

01:16:41 Bob Cihak, AZ: Preach it, Father.

01:16:42 Adam Paige: It’s worthwhile to take the time to complete Climacus

01:16:43 Jessica Imanaka: Makes sense to complete it.

01:16:43 Anthony: Isaac's waited 1500 years to talk to me, he can wait a bit more :)

01:16:46 Lee Graham: Yes, finish it up

01:16:48 Jeff O.: Thank you!

01:16:50 Leilani Nemeroff: Thank you!

01:16:50 Cindy Moran: Thank you Father!

Once again, my first thought at the end of this group is “Revolution“.  When read in the context of all that we have considered from The Evergetinos to date and from St. John Climacus, our entire way of viewing reality is being challenged, overthrown, or illuminated. One begins to see that our capacity as Christians to read and hear the Gospel, let alone the writings of the fathers, has been compromised. We have been formed in and by an atheistic secular culture.  That culture has permeated the Church in modern times in ways that we cannot even comprehend. 

God has revealed himself to us; not only the depth of his love and compassion, but also the reality of sin and the struggle that remains for us within this world.  We cannot understand the danger of fornication and lust to our salvation unless we come to understand the importance of purity of heart. God has created us for Himself, in His image and likeness, and our desire must be directed toward Him if we are to experience the fulfillment of the deepest longings of the human heart - let alone the right ordering of our bodily desires. Thus, our lust or fornication is not simply a moral infraction or a negative view of human sexuality but evidence of an idolatry of the self and so adultery in regard to our relationship with God - infidelity in regard to the Heavenly Bridegroom who has given Himself to us completely.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:22:39 Bob Cihak, AZ: P. 195, # A

00:31:49 Myles Davidson: There’s a book called Your Brain On Porn about the brain changes that happen

00:35:05 Myles Davidson: Yes, its a book… Your Brain on Porn: Internet Pornography and the Emerging Science of Addiction

https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B00N2AH8NW?ref_=mr_referred_us_au_nz

00:43:58 Myles Davidson: John Cassian does a good job of outlining the difference between abstinence and chastity (Conference 12)

00:49:41 Forrest Cavalier: If they are unrepentant in a state of mortal sin, the attempt to be married will fail.

00:55:26 Anna Lalonde: Yes! I don't wear makeup because I feel the same way.

00:57:28 Anthony: Someone on substance wrote an article that dressing to be titillating is a way to exert power over others and is socially worse than pornography which often is in red light areas.

00:57:48 Anthony: Substance. Sorry. :)

00:57:56 Anthony: Substack

00:57:58 Myles Davidson: Substack?

01:07:32 Anna Lalonde: When is a thought a sin? My child asks.

01:12:21 Anthony: There's got to be an "easier" way to approach this. God wouldn't make us to be so easily manipulated without help ready at hand; God wouldn't make us so that we understand the value of chastity only after experiencing sin in thought word and deed.

01:17:17 Anthony: I wasn't being facetious.

01:20:53 Cameron Jackson: Evil is real. 
Warfare is not really a metaphor.

01:27:15 Myles Davidson: Replying to "202501131635300000.jpg"

That’s a beautiful book! Where did you get that?

01:27:39 Nikki: Wonderful teaching

01:30:59 Anna Lalonde: Replying to "[Full message cannot be displayed on this version]" 

 What's the book link? I got kicked out

01:32:37 Lilly: Sorry I didnt hear. No class Wed?

01:32:40 MOME hermits: Thank you dear Father :)!

01:32:44 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You it always a Blessing every time we gather

01:32:48 Cameron Jackson: Thank you Father!

01:33:25 Suzanne Romano: Pax!

01:33:27 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:33:33 Dave Warner | AL: Thank you Father!

01:33:47 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father

01:33:48 Simon Greener: Thank you for my first session from down under.

One of the reasons that I’ve decided to prolong our study by reading this letter of St. John Climacus is that it speaks to our hearts about not only our interior life, the struggle with the passions and the growth of the virtues, but it also exhorts us - warning us that the care of others in love, our concern for their spiritual well-being trumps all things. In other words, our spiritual life cannot lead us to become self focused. Rather, it is meant to create hearts that are selfless and attentive to others and their needs. 

What St John says about the care of souls and the responsibilities of spiritual elders he says to all of us. The consolation that we have received from Christ and the wisdom that he has bestowed upon us in our spiritual life and through experience is not our own possession. We seek to console as we have been consoled. We seek to protect as we have been protected by the grace of God and the guidance that we have received at the hands of others. The Church is not a business nor is it to function like one. We come to Church and receive the Sacrament not to “take something” for ourselves. We are drawn into the very life of the Holy Trinity and our “Amen” when receiving this gift means that we are saying “so be it” - let this be the reality in my life!  Like the good Shepherd, I will lay down my life for the good of others.

We can never set aside our identity to fit in with society, any more than a spiritual elder can set aside his responsibility and his role of guiding and forming others. Therefore, this letter we are reading is not simply a pious exhortation but rather a call to revolution; that is, a call to radical repentance. We must turn to God in every way in order that by His grace we might love others as He has loved us.

---

Text of chat during the group:

00:04:54 susan: asking prayers for my son peter and 16 week pregnant wife in la brea la below fires.

00:11:19 Rebecca Thérèse: Reacted to "asking prayers for m..." with 🙏

00:20:42 David: Having lived in Latin America for 12 years. Another notable difference is the priest often goes and meets everyone in the parish. I do think a lot of vacation days and shorter work hours help community as well.

00:25:21 Myles Davidson: The Protestant work ‘ethic’ has a lot to answer for

00:25:40 Wayne: Reacted to "The Protestant work ..." with 👍

00:25:50 David: Work to live not live to work is the saying in Spanish

00:25:56 Anthony: For the change in culture, see A History of the Protestant Reformation in England and Ireland by Cobbett.

00:26:16 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Work to live not liv..." with 👍

00:31:30 Bob Cihak, AZ: Re: priests and visiting their flock: Our Ruthenian church, at least in the wester USA Phoenix eparchy, has a strong tradition of annual House Blessings, (at least in the 3 out of about 20 Parishes that we know well) which does get the priest visiting parishioners, including a Gomez family here in CA. The family has 14 children and many grandchildren. The house was full AND they hosted a very good dinner for the family and the priest's family (my wife and me).

00:35:26 David: When I grew up near Lake Superior every house had a BMC and two crosses put on each door jam by the priest but that was Franciscans

00:35:38 Una: How can a priest balance his need for friendship with being a pastor. If the friend elects to go to confession to another priest, isn't that perhaps preferable. Especially if the person can find another good priest?

00:36:50 Myles Davidson: Our priest is doing house blessings as we speak

00:43:01 Kelli: PRIDE

00:45:06 David: A nice way to handle that is great question how can we find the truth and then delegate yourself and others to come back with different things.
00:50:08 David: Leaders at least in business are best chosen by those who people follow not appointed.

00:53:56 David: Does some of that be the secular take and separation of church and state? It almost seems like there is tolerance or opinions about everything but values based on faith sometimes. When one decides when human life begins there is faith on both sides.

00:55:43 David: I am just wondering if a lot of the difference it based on secular beliefs

00:56:21 David: We act one way in church and are pressured to relativism in the world.

01:04:10 Lyle: Amen, Father.

01:04:34 David: Mmm monetizing BINGO or spiritual direction great point

01:11:38 Lyle: The Holy Spirit can do it!

01:12:04 Maureen Cunningham: Church in Egypt and Middle East is being persecuted

01:12:35 Myles Davidson: The growing interest in the desert fathers in the Church is going to change it in a dramatic way eventually I think

01:13:13 Anna Lalonde: Holy Spirit was moving in you. Don't apologize.

01:14:02 Bob Cihak, AZ: Replying to "Holy Spirit was movi..."

Preach it, Father!!!

01:14:10 Bob Cihak, AZ: Reacted to "Holy Spirit was movi..." with 👍

01:14:15 ANDREW ADAMS: Reacted to "Holy Spirit was movi..." with 👍

01:14:27 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Preach it, Father!!!" with 🔥

01:15:05 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You Father and everyone such a Blessing

01:15:14 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:15:16 Suzanne Romano: Pax Vobiscum!

01:15:17 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:15:20 Deiren Masterson: Thank you Father

01:15:21 David: Thank you father God bless

01:15:35 Cindy Moran: Thank you@

The human appetites and desires are ever so powerful. This we know from experience.  Reflecting upon them through the lens of the ascetic life of the desert fathers shows us the scope and the depth of these realities and how they affect our lives. 

The spiritual and psychological astuteness of the desert fathers is unparalleled, but we must read their writings in a discerning fashion. We do not want to overgeneralize certain aspects of their teaching and so develop a negative anthropology; a kind of hatred for the body and its’ natural desires. Indeed there are many stories where certain desert fathers fell into great extremes; making themselves ill or placing themselves in grave danger.

The desert fathers had to learn as we do through experience how to approach these desires and to be clear about what they were truly seeking. The goal is purity of heart; a capacity to love and to give ourselves in love freely and without objectifying the other. Understood in this fashion, purity of heart and chastity should increase our capacity to love. It is not a restriction of our freedom but rather a state of being unfettered by our own desire for satisfaction and pleasure. The human heart can be a treacherous thing and at times can lead us along a path of self-destruction even when that path seems to promise the satisfaction of our hearts’ deepest longing. What the fathers came to understand through experience is that Grace alone can bring the healing that we desire and that Divine Eros is what overcomes disordered Eros. The Love of God dwelling within us opens up a path to the fulfillment of life. It is not control that we seek in the ascetic life but transformation; specifically transformation “in Christ.”

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Text of chat during the group:

00:09:34 Forrest Cavalier: Snowfall in inches in Pittsburgh by season.

00:10:09 Forrest Cavalier: Data from https://www.weather.gov/media/pbz/records/hissnow.pdf

00:10:44 Una: Why do we live in these environs?

00:20:05 Lilly: What page number?

00:20:36 Lori Hatala: 192

00:20:37 Wayne: 192

00:21:03 Lilly: Reacted to "192" with 👍

00:21:06 Lilly: Reacted to "192" with 👍

00:21:37 Una: At last, a woman's experience!

00:36:01 Una: When I'm deep in stillnes, I can see (to some degree) but when I engage with the world, I find it easy to doubt what I've seen

00:36:13 Una: and believed

00:36:16 Personal phone: I often find when I’m trying to exercise discipline (like fasting) on far too many occasions I find myself getting “hangry” and thus an certain I’d be far better to break my fast less than giving into my hanger and exposing that to others

00:36:47 Nikki: What would he have changed to continue clinging to God if it were suggested he lessen his prayer life, fasting, etc?

00:36:54 Una: I suspect this is part of the spiritual battle too and that transitions are important to be guarded

00:38:27 Anthony: As an FYI incase someone distrusts the heart too much:  I've run into the opposite error regarding the human heart....the error that says it is so untrustworthy and "totally depraved" that you can't trust anything in your self.  I learned it at a formative age, and it's hard to get rid of that error.

00:40:16 Personal phone: Reacted to "I often find when I’…" with ❤️

00:45:34 Una: That comment was a continuation of a previous comment from me

00:46:39 Una: Reacted to "As an FYI incase s..." with ❤️

00:54:10 Nikki: It is natural that the human body has these feelings of arousal, in order for humans to reproduce. What is it the monks here are wanting to achieve? Being able to shut down these hormonal responses in the body? I ask also because this occurs without demonic influence.

00:54:12 Anthony: On this topic of purity, I learned from "The Cave of Treasures" attributed to St Ephrem that the Flood came due to massive fornication.

01:01:02 Lilly: Other than Theology of the Body, are there other sources we can read about this topic?

01:02:13 Lilly: I find it a bit too confusing and romanticized

01:02:26 Judith: Reacted to "I find it a bit too ..." with 👍

01:05:13 Lilly: Like this young monk who didn't have knowledge of his normal bodily functions, how are future-parents supposed to teach their children properly? I don't see myself using Theology of the body as a main source

01:05:48 Anthony: Reacted to Like this young monk... with "👍"

01:08:49 Anthony: Then it looks like the primary teaching should be on the Will: it's formation, inclination,  weaknesses and deliberation to do bad or good.

01:09:50 Anthony: Ok. Thank you.

01:14:11 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You   Blessing

01:14:19 Personal phone: 6 days! I’d super hangry!

01:15:03 Nikki: Thank you

01:15:09 Suzanne Romano: God bless everyone!

01:15:12 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:15:21 Aric B: Thank you Father!

As we read this letter we slowly begin to see that St. John is not presenting his reader with a manual for spiritual direction; that is, specific counsels in regard to practices and disciplines. St. John’s astute psychological observations and his capacity for discernment reveals a heart that has been transformed by love. Contrary to the old adage love is NOT blind. Love, in fact, sees all things with greater clarity. 

One of the things that we struggle with in our day is a tendency to dissect certain realities (as well as personalities) in order that we might see ourselves as understanding them or being able to control them. The desert fathers, however, never allow us to lose sight of the mystery of the human person or the relationship that is at the heart of Christianity. A human person is not the sum of their actions or their opinions any more than God can be reduced to the teachings of the catechism. Love draws us in to the mystery of God and also allows us to see the presence of God in the other. If any Christian, let alone any elder, loses sight of this then our interactions with others are going to become grossly distorted and our view of God myopic. Love must shape our hearts and expand them to the dimensions of God himself. 

This may seem to be an absurdity and yet it is the reality that has been revealed to us. God has become man in order that man might become God. Our Lord assumes all that there is in the human experience - our sin, sorrow, failure, weakness and death. He embraces all in order that we might never be in isolation and that his presence within us might also be a source of radical healing. The miracles in the gospel merely show us the desire of God to remove every obstacle in our experience of His life. 

Therefore, an elder must have experiential knowledge of this Love; especially how it touches the woundedness of our sin and our experience of hopelessness and isolation. The elder must become that love so as to enter into the sufferings of those who come to him. Whatever guidance he offers, whatever correction he makes, must be rooted in a love that is curative and that seeks to raise up the other. Only one who has encountered the wonder of such Divine Love has the capacity to enter into and take upon himself the vulnerability of the other. In this sense, the spiritual elder and his role cannot be seen outside of his relationship with Christ; for it is only the love of Christ that can possibly bring healing to the human heart.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:04:47 Anna Lalonde: What about them?

00:05:37 Anna Lalonde: I'm in GA. Where are they?

00:15:30 Anna Lalonde: We finally got both books for family gift and we're ordering four volumes too.

00:27:58 Myles Davidson: I know someone who has never owned a computer and goes to the library to use the internet, due to his fear of what it might lead to

00:30:22 Anna Lalonde: We experienced a family friendship break and after saw how we fell into sin or lessened our way of life. Such an awakening experience.

00:31:49 Lyle: His fear may be VERY warranted.  How often does the devil DIRECTLY attack us?  His friend may view something that “appears” very innocent, but it may lead to something very evil.

00:38:04 Anna Lalonde: My sister is a missionary of charity. Love her letters home on guidance to family.

00:42:06 Lyle: A word of ecouragement from a recovering ADDICT.

00:42:23 Andres Oropeza: St. Theophane wrote that we should picture a lazy man sitting in his room. His house is on fire but you wouldn’t tell him it’s fire, you would let him see the flames. Then he would be roused to look for a way out; an open door, a window. He said the Holy Spirit does this for us. Maybe we can do this for others too, patiently and lovingly help them to see that their way of life is harmful and were it inevitably leads. 
Though often times I think we wouldn’t try to escape even once we realize our house is on fire. I’ve experienced this myself!

00:42:33 Lyle: Avoid ANYTHING that appears "questionable".

00:43:58 Lyle: Myles' friend.

01:04:51 David: We often sit back and hope for miracles but all these verbs the Lord uses requiere us to be doing things first before the remedy can be found-“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

01:09:03 Suzanne Romano: A great confessor I had always used to say, "There's a time for every grace."

01:13:32 MOME hermits: Thank you Fr. David, Blessed Solemnity of Mary and New Year :)!

01:13:40 MOME hermits: Fr. Charbel

01:13:46 Joanne Martinez: Thank you!

01:13:53 Suzanne Romano: Thank you!

01:13:57 Aric B: Thank you Father!

01:13:58 David: Have a blessed 2025! Thank you father

01:14:03 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you. Happy New Year everyone🙂

After many weeks of reading the hypotheses on fornication and the pursuit of purity of heart, what finally comes into focus is the fruit of the fathers’ experience in the struggle. What they discovered is that discipline, fasting, vigils, etc. are absolutely necessary. Yet these practices are not ends in themselves. They are to be a reflection of our desire for God and our seeking in love our soul’s Beloved. 

Desire is what gives us the capacity to love and give ourselves in love. In it we sense a lack that only God can satisfy. Ascetic practice is not meant to be an act of contempt for our human nature, but rather an acknowledgment of the strength and the power of our natural desires. What is good can become disordered whenever there is an imbalance or lack of measure. Our natural desire, Eros, can only be transformed by Divine Eros. Therefore, it is only by grace that the passions can be overcome.  Our hearts must be filled with an urgent longing for God. 

Outside of the acknowledgment of the necessity of Grace, we become the most pitiable of all creatures. So long as we hold onto the illusion of overcoming the passions by raw grit, we will find ourselves returning to our sin or sinking into a much darker place of anger and pride. St. John Cassian tells us we must “base our courage not on our own power or on our asceticism, but in the aid of God, our Master”. When this takes place, even the deepest recesses of the unconscious can be healed and transformed. Likewise, the  countenance of the pure of heart begins to change; we begin to see the inner beauty that rest in the heart of one who loves and desires God wholly.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:04:03 Lori Hatala: reboot

00:12:17 Una: Problem with sound?

00:12:25 Una: Yes

00:13:01 Una: It's good now

00:13:08 Una: . Can hear you humming

00:16:33 Lilly: Do you know Fr Teodosy?

00:16:34 ANDREW ADAMS: My copy came today!

00:21:09 Una: What page? I'm lost

00:21:23 ANDREW ADAMS: 190

00:21:50 Una: Thanks

00:32:34 Lilly: Asking this question respectfully, if a Priest can’t cure his passion, would it be appropriate to take medicine to help ?

00:33:37 Lilly: Generally speaking, no specific medicatiob

00:33:42 Lilly: n*

00:37:28 Suzanne Romano: My experience has been that the grace of continence is given to those who use the means God gives, and is diligent in avoiding the occasions of sin.

00:48:38 Anthony: Life is like art. Each of us is a unique material: canvas, copper foil, paper, wood. Part of Christian life is learning what material we are and what techniques best bring out the beatific vision in the material we are.  The same image can be brought out uniquely in each different art.

00:52:24 Suzanne Romano: Father, may I ask a question that relates to the previous Hypotheses on gluttony? 

00:52:37 Forrest Cavalier: Elias in the earlier story did not mutilate, emasculate, or injure himself. By avoiding injury, keeping his masculinity intact, and building on nature, he returned to serve the convent in a very masculine and fatherly way for a long time. It would have been tragic if he deformed the gifts God had given him.

00:52:52 Myles Davidson: Is using caffeine during a night vigil cheating?

00:54:22 Una: It can mess with your sleep when you do get to bed

00:54:59 Una: I used to write until 3 a.m. during my last novel.

00:56:09 Suzanne Romano: Father, may I ask a question that relates to the previous Hypotheses on gluttony? 

00:56:59 Suzanne Romano: Thank you. I can distill three principles from the readings: Eat once per day; stop eating before you are completely full; and never eat for the sheer sake of pleasure or comfort. If one takes up these three principles as a regular discipline, are there ever times when it is permissible to take something just for pleasure or comfort - say on Sundays or on Holidays - say, a dessert or a hot cocoa, etc?

00:59:25 Anthony: Haha

00:59:34 Carol Roper: Reacted to "Haha" with 👍

01:01:57 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Haha" with 🍝

01:02:12 Suzanne Romano: Reacted to Haha with "🍝"

01:06:02 Rebecca Thérèse: Psychologists think that impulse control is a good thing in areas where it suits them!

01:06:03 Maureen Cunningham: Maybe  it just a season when a person get rid of fleshly desires

01:06:37 Maureen Cunningham: Not forever  maybe  a Season

01:10:22 Una: I think in Cassian's Conferences, he talks about how you spend your day will be reflected in your nighttime dreams. For example, if you aren't occupied with God during the day, you will have these troubling dreams

01:10:32 Bob Cihak, AZ: I'm 84 and finally started "settling down" several years ago.

01:10:36 Myles Davidson: Conference 12

01:10:53 Adam Paige: Reacted to "I'm 84 and finally s..." with 😇

01:11:00 Una: Thanks, Myles!

01:11:09 Myles Davidson: Interestingly the 19th C. translation refused to translate this conference

01:11:26 Myles Davidson: Too spicy for them

01:11:34 Wayne: Replying to "I think in Cassian's..."

Good point, thanks for this observation.

01:14:20 Una: Another mystical operation!

01:14:33 Una: How can we understand these?

01:21:40 Wayne: YOU might find the movies on You Tube

01:21:56 Myles Davidson: Replying to "YOU might find the m..."

Yes its there

01:22:17 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you. Happy New Year everyone.🙂

01:22:23 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You Father  Lords Blessing In the  New Year

01:22:26 MOME hermits: Thank you Fr. David!

01:23:09 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:23:12 Suzanne Romano: Great meeting! Thanks!

How do we approach in our own lives the interior struggle for purity of heart, chastity? The battle, as we see in the writings of the fathers can be incredibly fierce. Part of this intense struggle is that that it is the human condition: sexuality and sensuality are part of what it is to be a human being. Furthermore, as we are in a constant state of receptivity through our senses, there are so many things that can stimulate the desires associated with this appetite. 

We also know that we can be lazy about understanding this reality of human life and equally lazy in the spiritual life in seeking the grace  and wisdom of God to order our desires towards that which is holy. Furthermore, our struggle is also with principalities and powers. The fathers teach us that the demons are provoked by envy when they see an individual growing in holiness. Therefore, they will terrorize an individual by placing images and fantasies before them. 

On an emotional and spiritual level, this often gives rise to a terrible sense of shame, casting the soul into despondency and despair. As a person struggles with this passion, the sense of vulnerability is great precisely because it is such a deep part of who we are as human beings. The demons use that sense of shame to their advantage. The mere presence of thoughts tied to this passion frustrate the soul and fragment the mind. The demons will also use the shame to manipulate the way that we respond to the struggle; they will seek to make us a demonize human desire and sexuality in order that we might repress it in such a way that it distorts our perception of reality. They do so to keep our focus off of God and his grace.  If they can keep us in despair and make us believe that God is disappointed with us, then they have won the battle. If we ignore them and turn the mind and the heart to God in prayer and rest in his grace then we are not only freed of their temptations, but experience the peace of the kingdom. 

In an uncanny way, the fathers saw and understood all of this through experience; many after 40 years of struggling came to experience freedom only through their abandonment to God and his mercy. It is then, when humbled in mind and body, that they were consoled. Having received such a gift, it then became their responsibility to console others in this delicate yet fierce struggle.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:15:28 Rachel: Hi

00:15:42 Bob Cihak, AZ: P. 188, Mid-page "From the Same Author"

00:18:05 Bob Cihak, AZ: Thanks. "Fornication" = lust as well as physical actions or interactions. if I understand correctly?

00:41:34 Forrest Cavalier: The first two accounts in this hypothesis are warning to even those who do not struggle with the intensity of this kind of temptation. Those who are unmolested are not safe by their own efforts only. God's grace is at work.

00:41:54 Rachel: I find it interesting that we can be more comfortable with admitting anger, envy, ambition and other forms of pride into the heart yet are filled with shame for temptations against purity. Do you think that other sins such as anger cease with the grace of purity of heart?

00:56:18 Rachel: Thank you. You touched upon how we see each other thank you

00:58:01 Una: I did an article years ago for the National Catholic Register about the dismal record of marriages breaking apart when the couple had been living together. Stats were very bad.

01:00:42 Vanessa: Exactly why I homeschool:)

01:03:35 MOME hermits: You are so right on with all of that Fr. David. We love your balance in it all.

01:03:58 Vanessa: Reacted to "You are so right on ..." with ❤️

01:05:31 MOME hermits: Yes, to help facilitate the person going where they need to, to hear from God within.

01:14:10 Phil: Father, could you kindly attempt to reconcile the type of vexation that a saint like Padre Pio experienced, with the quote form Jesus in the gospels, where he says, "...my yolk is easy, my burdern is light." Thank you!

01:15:12 Rachel: Not just making a fool out of ourselves by defending our own honor but losing our very Life, christ Himself

01:23:07 Rachel: Thank you

01:23:08 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you 🙂 Happy Christmas everyone 🎄

01:23:21 Troy Amaro: Thank You Father

As one moves along through this text, one begins to understand that St. John Climacus is not only addressing elders but all those who have the care of souls. Fundamentally this is every Christian!There is no radical individualism in our faith, nor do we see ourselves disconnected from the sins of others and the burdens they bear. Love, compels us to be attentive to the other; not in a condescending fashion, but attending to them with the tenderness and compassion that we have received from Christ. Our Lord is the archetype for us and the consolation that we receive from his hand we are to offer to others freely.

The fundamental virtues of an elder are humility and obedience; that is, truthful living and the capacity to listen. How can one serve others when there is any focus on the self or when they are still in the grip of the passions? There is  nothing so unseemly as an angry elder - one who looks at others with a harsh eye or is always quick to investigate trifling sins. The elder must be driven by love that makes him ever vigilant and watchful of those things that can be obstacles to the spiritual development of those in his care. He cannot be lax in fulfilling this responsibility or timid and cowardly in offering correction. He must be willing to offer counsel even when there is no thirst for understanding. 

One begins to understand that such a responsibility is carried out with fear and trembling. The care of souls carries within it the Cross; it is crucified love that guides the elder and gives light to his path.  He is never a passive observer, but one who like Christ looks out and acknowledges the crowds as being sheep without a shepherd; in fact, as sheep already mauled by the wolves and in desperate need of healing. Thus, the capacity to care for others in this fashion is not something that can be set aside; nor can the abilities that God has given to an elder be buried in the ground with drawing down His wrath.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:09:34 Una: Does Father send out handouts in email?

00:10:08 Una: Could I get one at Una.McManus@gmail.com?

00:10:25 Adam Paige: https://mcusercontent.com/c38acab568d650f7ef65f39df/files/22eb6d8c-a2f9-1ed8-1270-b5bcd86c22f6/To_the_Shepherd.01.pdf

00:10:31 Una: Thank you

00:10:43 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Thank you" with 👍

00:12:22 Una: Yes for me on New Year DAy

00:12:26 Sam: Greetings from Hot 🔥 Australia Fr

00:12:39 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Greetings from Hot ..." with 🇦🇺

00:18:01 paul g.: Amen

00:21:55 Bob Cihak, AZ: Amen, Amen!

00:33:54 Mary Clare Wax: Fr. it is so refreshing listening to you. We love your contemplative spirit and your love for the desert father teachings. Thank you. We appreciate your present sharing on the priesthood. So true.

00:34:22 susan: Amen

00:36:20 Bob Cihak, AZ: Reacted to "Fr. it is so refresh..." with 👍

00:37:22 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Fr. it is so refresh..." with 👍

00:38:31 Andres Oropeza: Is it always pride when you have trouble trusting your spiritual Father because of his manner of life or that of his monks? I feel like I’m judging him/them but I also have serious misgivings. Could it be just a test of obedience where the Lord wants me to obey even with the misgivings, to have faith before understanding ?

00:41:56 Bob Cihak, AZ: As the fathers and you say, the wisdom required to be a spiritual leader is learned from and with experience, not just book learning, which usually required a lot of time.

00:43:08 MOME hermits: I (sr charista maria) believe Mary's special presence in our times helps to make up for what is lacking in the priesthood today, when we have a special relationship with her.

00:49:32 David: The orthodox later republished that as Unseen Warfare by Nicodemus of the Holy Mountain and Theophan the Recluse

00:49:47 Kate : Father, could you address what to do when one experiences a spiritual father who is not mentally healthy and whose guidance not sound?  In this case, I would think that one must pay attention to their misgivings.  We lived through this and sadly witnessed much damage done to souls.

00:50:24 Maureen Cunningham: Christ was betrayed

01:14:07 Victor - WV: Thanks to all, to Father as well. Merry Christmas! 🎄 🙏🏼

01:14:26 Bob Cihak, AZ: Reacted to "Thanks to all, to Fa..." with 👍

01:14:47 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Thanks to all, to Fa..." with 👍

01:16:02 Laura: Reacted to "Thanks to all, to Fa..." with 🎄

01:16:17 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Thanks to all, to Fa..." with 🎄

01:20:00 Andres Oropeza: I think it was in this book where it describes the spiritual father being like Moses stretching his arms out so his child can pass through the sea unharmed. Beautiful image 
Off topic, but does it make a bad confession if you feel like you should’ve confessed to your spiritual father that you judged him specifically (vs just judging people) but didn’t because of anxiety ?

01:23:26 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You

01:23:28 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂Happy Christmas everyone🎄

01:23:29 David: Thank you Father and God Bless you and your mother! Merry Christmas! As we celebrate his birth may he be reborn anew in our hearts.

01:24:17 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:24:27 Rachel: Thank you father

01:24:28 Deiren Masterson: Thank you Father.

01:24:36 liz sabath: Thank you Father!!

01:24:37 Sr Barbara Jean Mihalchick: BleSSED Christmas~

Once again, we find ourselves in the midst of the laboratory of the desert and watching the Fathers’ struggle with the passions, in particular the passion of fornication or lust. The beauty in this, of course, is that we are placed in the privileged position of seeing their struggle from the inside; dealing with both the passion and also learning how to engage in the ascetic life in a measured fashion.

It is made clear that we are to struggle with our whole being and to be fully engaged in the battle. On a physical level, this means restraining our appetites. We hear that the monks understood that they must not give themselves over to satiation in regard to bodily appetites. They must humble the mind and body in order that they might cling more to God in their prayer and trust in his grace. This meant, of course, the experience of privation; but it also opened them up to the richness of the interior life and the depth of prayer. Therefore, it was not just an act of endurance but also an expression of hope in God and his promises. More importantly we might say it is an expression of love. We are willing to make great sacrifices for the things that we hold to be precious. When we love God and the things of God, when we love virtue and prayer, we will do all in our power to attain it and maintain it.

With hypothesis 26, we begin to see the fruit of their long experience in the ascetic life. They could see that they often emphasized the wrong thing in the spiritual battle or became unmeasured in their disciplines to the point of losing sight of God. One can become so fixated on overcoming a particular passion or fighting with the thoughts of the demons, that they fall into pride by failing to emphasize the one thing alone that can overcome the demons, as well as draw the natural into the supernatural; that is, the grace of God. To say that Christianity is an ascetical religion is not to say that the discipline of such a life and the exercise of our faith is an end in itself. The end of our striving is love and and theosis – intimacy, union, with the triune God.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:08:09 Bob Cihak, AZ: P. 184, # 12

00:13:00 Bob Cihak, AZ: P. 184, # 12

00:21:05 Adam Paige: “A clear rule for self-control handed down by the Fathers is this: stop eating while still hungry and do not continue until you are satisfied.” - St John Cassian, On the Eight Vices

00:21:43 paul g.: Reacted to "“A clear rule for se…" with ✔️

00:21:47 Bob Cihak, AZ: Thanks, Adam.

00:21:50 paul g.: Reacted to "P. 184, # 12" with ✔️

00:21:52 Phil: Modern medicine also says humans need 12 serving of carbs a day and half as much dairy. Bless their heart, they are trying! ... "Lord forgive them, for they know not what they do!"

00:23:30 Myles Davidson: Because people need differing amounts of sleep or food, what would you say is the thing we should be looking out for, to know we are getting the right amounts of both. Is it a clarity of mind and attention in prayer? Anything else?

00:26:16 Adam Paige: Reacted to "Thanks, Adam." with 👍

00:28:49 Andres Oropeza: Is it always a bad thing to derive comfort from food? I mean a hot meal is preferable to a cold one during winter especially. Or a hot drink really sets you at ease after being outside in the cold. Should we shun the comfort and just eat cold meals and drink cold drinks (or hot if the drink isn’t good hot). Or is the comfort only an issue when it becomes the point of eating?

00:30:48 Myles Davidson: There have been plenty of studies done on rats that reducing caloric intake extends life.

00:31:21 Adam Paige: “Stand at the brink of despair, and when you see that you cannot bear it anymore, draw back a little, and have a cup of tea.” - Saint Sophrony Sakharov

00:36:03 Carol Roper: it seems like the issue is longing. to what do we direct our longing. Advent strikes me as a season of longing.

00:40:16 Myles Davidson: @Phil What was the name of that Elder with the stages of the Jesus Prayer

00:40:37 Adam Paige: @Phil What was the name of that Elder with the stages of the Jesus Prayer Father Archimandrite Ilie Cleopa

00:40:42 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "@Phil What was the n..." with 🙏

00:44:04 Liz D: Reacted to "it seems like the ..." with ❤️

00:48:09 Phil: Yea, Ramana died in middle age, but his extreme fasting (starting in his teenage years) does seem to have shortened his life.

00:49:12 Phil: Replying to "@Phil What was the n..." 

 Yes, I believe that is him!

00:49:38 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Yes, I believe that ..." with 👍

00:50:26 Phil: Yes, there are at least a half dozen videos on YouTube of Cleopa himself giving spiritual advice.

00:50:58 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "Yes, there are at le..." with 👍

01:03:20 Adam Paige: The Struggle with God - Paul Evdokimov (PDF) https://jbburnett.com/resources/evdokimov_strugglewGod1966.pdf

01:03:24 Phil: "The mystics are a law unto themselves." Fr. Anthony De Mello.

01:03:56 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "The Struggle with Go..." with 👍

01:06:07 Adam Paige: “It behooves us as well to destroy the sinners in our land-namely, our fleshly feelings-on the morning of their birth, as they emerge, and, while they are still young, to dash the children of Babylon against the rock. Unless they are killed at a very tender age they will, with our acquiescence, rise up to our harm as stronger adults, and they will certainly not be overcome without great pain and effort.” St John Cassian, The Institutes (6th Book: The Spirit of Fornication)

01:16:51 Maureen Cunningham: Thank You Father

01:17:15 Phil: LOL, that's great! Thank you, Father.

01:18:05 ANDREW ADAMS: Thank you, Father!

01:18:08 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you🙂

01:18:13 Aric B: Thank you Father!

Sometimes during a group it is as if a light comes on that illuminates some aspect of life in a magnificent fashion and that speaks to each person in the group whatever their background or station in life. This was true in particular this evening as we continued to discuss St. John’s writing “To the Shepherd” on the responsibilities of a spiritual elder. As we made our way through the text, it became clear that St. John’s teaching about the care of souls applies to all of those who are responsible for the formation of others; not only priests or religious, but also parents, teachers, friends, etc. 

Not one of us is free from the charge of the salvation of others; aiding them through our prayers, taking opportune moments to clarify their understanding of the faith, being living witnesses of the gospel and the love of the cross. All of us have the responsibility of seeking purity of heart and freedom from the passions in order that we might be able to discern with clarity and humility the needs of those around us. Lacking this, St. John tells us, we undermine our capacity to be well disposed and compassionate to each individual for whom we are responsible or who enters our life. How is it that we can serve others if we cannot discern good from evil and everything in between?

In fact, St. John tells us it is a great disgrace for a superior to pray for or hold forward spiritual gifts to others that he himself is not acquired. How is it that he can faithfully guide others to God and to become partakers of the glory of God if he has no understanding of this within his own heart. Experience is the truest teacher and if the superior lacks that experience, he may only bring harm to others.

Those who are spiritual elders, fathers, or mothers, must not be tempted to set aside this role in order to enjoy worldly friendship with those in their charge. It can be a natural thing to want companionship and to some extent this can exist. However, if a familiarity develops between the superior and others, he may lose the capacity to guide and feel constrained to do the bidding of others; never to contradict them, refuse them, or correct them.

The elder must be pure of heart and able to understand the interior life and also the realities that sanctify us within the life of the church. The elder must be able to create a culture that forms a mind and heart directed toward God, the love of neighbor and the love of virtue. He must be able to discern the emotional capacity and maturity of others, so as not to push too hard and risk breaking their spirit or neglect giving counsel or correction of those who are quick witted and naturally gifted.

Such purity of heart alone allows the elder to perceive supernatural realities and to understand the struggles that individuals have with multiple demons. The elder must be able to cure passions thought by others to be incurable. In this sense, he must have truly put on the mind of Christ and be the most humble and obedient member of the community.

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We were taken very deep this evening; not only into our understanding of the passion of lust or fornication, but also deep into the human mind and heart and how they function. The anthropology of the Desert Fathers was astute and profound. Despite residing in the desert, far removed from converse with both men and women, they knew the nature of the human person very well. We are sexual beings; that is, our sexuality is part of the experience of ourselves within the reality of this world and in our relationships with others. We relate to others in and through our sexuality; not consciously but simply as part of the reality the shapes are perceptions. This in turn shapes are imagination and understanding - again in ways that we often do not perceive. 

The Fathers teach us to keep this in mind in regard to the spiritual struggles that we have surrounding our appetites, in particular sensuality. These natural human appetites are very powerful and shapes us in both conscious and unconscious ways. 

Furthermore, these realities are not unknown to the demons. They are relentless and crafty in how they try to divert the mind and the heart away from God. We were given a couple of interesting stories this evening about young boys who came to the monastery as children having never experienced or seen a woman. Yet, in both accounts, they find themselves either overwhelmed by the thoughts associated with this particular passion or having such thoughts manifest themselves in their dreams. 

How is this possible one might wonder? Well at least it tells us why we must be vigilant and watch all of the movements of our minds and our hearts and what we expose ourselves to on a day-to-day basis. But it also tells us that the influence can be far more subtle than we imagine, and that we can be moved simply by the natural desire itself or by demonic provocation. The demons through the words and actions of others, or through our subtle observations of the world around us, can influence the turn of our minds to the things that take hold of the are imagination. Of course, this can be completely benign. Yet it will be used against us in the spiritual battle. Therefore, if we wonder why the Fathers emphasize the necessity of such intense vigilance and the humbling of the mind and the body through prayer and fasting, we begin to see that it is because they had no superficial understanding of the human person. They understood this realities better than we do in our own day; the mystery of the human person, the forces at work within us, the contradictions that we bear within our own minds and how we can even be drawn to things that are clearly destructive. Therefore, in an unvarnished fashion, they make it clear to us that we must create a new habit of mind, a habit of virtue. Our hearts must become attached to the Lord and the Lord alone if we desire to know the holiness and freedom that he makes possible for us. What they speak of is beautiful beyond measure - a life caught up in the eternal love of Christ. Will we seek it out for ourselves?

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We continued our reading and discussion of the treatment and cures that the spiritual father must understand for every malady that afflicts a person in the spiritual life. He must understand not only how to apply them but also the manner they are applied to each individual person with their unique needs. No person is the same and in the spiritual battle the elder must understand the subtle manifestations of spiritual illness and the manner in which various cures might be applied.

One of the most striking aspects of tonight’s discussion was on the capacity of the elder to be free from and endure nausea and to be able to untiringly strive to dispel the stench of vomit. Of course, St. John is speaking about sin itself and the willingness of the elder to enter into the darkness in which the other person finds himself; to descend into their hell and to endure the stench of sin itself. The capacity to do this comes through engaging in the spiritual battle throughout the course of one’s life and attending in obedience to the counsel of one’s own spiritual father. The lack of nausea and the ability to endure the stench of the vomit of sin comes from having long been immersed in it through one’s own struggles. Compassion is born in a powerful way through the experience of common trials. 

Beyond this, St. John tells that the shepherd must experience blessed dispassion. In other words, he must be free of the passions that would blind him and his ability to discern the particular needs of those in his care. This discernment allows the elder to illuminate the path that leads to repentance and so gives him the capacity to “resurrect every dead soul”.

This is the identity that every Christian soul should seek to embrace. While it’s true that not everyone is called to be a spiritual elder, every Christian by virtue of their baptism is called to the holiness described here and given the responsibility for the care of souls in their midst. We are responsible for the salvation and goodwill of those around us as much as we are responsible for our own.

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We continued our reflection upon the fathers’ writing on fornication and the passion of lust. What becomes immediately clear is how much they prized this virtue and how important they saw it for the spiritual life as a whole. Purity of heart has always been connected, rightly wrongly, with purity on the level of sensuality. The fact that the fathers valued it so greatly also led them into a kind of fierce ascetic battle to attain it. At times they could fall into extremes and excess - leading to a weakening of the body almost to the point of death. They had to learn that the disciplining of the body through fasting, vigils and prayer is only part of the struggle. The more important element is relying upon the grace of God and trusting in him in the midst of the spiritual warfare.

One of the things that have made this battle with fornication so difficult is the shame that is often associated with it; not only with the physical act itself, but the relentless thoughts that often afflict an individual. This shame often creates an internal agitation and anxiety that makes a person more vulnerable to seeking immediate physical relief. Shame also has led asceticism to be used as a defense mechanism, causing many to repress the desires that they have rather than allowing them to be transformed by the grace of God and by a growing attachment to and love for him.  Inevitably such repression will break down and the same desires will manifest themselves in an even stronger fashion. It is for this reason that the demons become the greatest accuser of one who has fallen into this particular sin. He knows that if he can lead them into despair and get them to give up on the hope for healing, he will be able to dismantle their spiritual life.

Patience, endurance, the willingness to bear affliction without making concessions to the thoughts that afflict us – this is the path forward. Paired with clinging to the grace of God and the strength that comes through the holy sacraments, the disordered attachments begin to diminish. The fathers eventually discovered, as we have already seen, that it is important to avoid excess. If we are ruthless with ourselves, we can we can weaken ourselves not only physically, but also in terms of our resolve. Quite simply a person can grow so tired that they want to give up.

We must always keep before our eyes, then, the heavenly bridegroom and the understanding that we wage the spiritual warfare, not in isolation, but surrounded by all the angels in the Saints. And even if we are to fall every single day, St. John Climacus tells us, and yet turn to God in repentance our guardian angel looks upon us with joy. 

May God give us all not only the resolve to remain in the battle but an invincible hope in his grace and mercy.

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Having completed the 30th Step of the Ladder of Divine Ascent, we are blessed to receive from the hand of St. John one additional bit of writing – “To the Shepherd“. It is here that John writes to the Abbot of the neighboring monastery who first requested that John produce for his monastery a treatise on the spiritual life.  He turns his attention now to this shepherd of souls – he who is responsible for the care of those entrusted to him. For the Abbot, it would be the monks of his monastery, and for those within the church, it would be the spiritual father. One might also say that the words written here would apply to all of those who offer spiritual care to others, including and especially mothers and fathers. 

John begins by telling us that the shepherd is he who seeks out to set aright the lost sheep. He does this not primarily through words, but by means of guilelessness, zeal and prayer; that is, by example. The shepherd above all must be a model of virtue and one who instructs out of experience not from what he has read.

He must also be a pilot. One who is a skilled helmsman, guiding his ship, not only through the billows of a storm, but raising it up out of the abyss itself, as if raising a ship that has sunk or smashed against the rocks. Again, one who has the capacity to do this is a person who has persevered through the experience of fear and hopelessness, one who knows where the dangers lie, the signs of a storm, and where one will crash upon the reef. He must be a genuine teacher, one upon whose heart God has etched the truth. He should not be one who needs other books, but rather he should be one who speaks from the heart and speaks of his own distinctive and unique trials. He must understand then that he must teach from on high. For lowly instructions cannot possibly heal lowly beings. We are healed by grace and through divine wisdom. 

In the role of a shepherd, he must not be afraid to reprimand those sheep who fall behind because of slothfulness or gluttony. To be separated from the flock, to cut oneself off from communion with God and with others who seek to breathe the same air, is to place oneself in jeopardy. The shepherd must forever keep his gaze directed heavenward, especially when the sheep are inclined to keep their heads turned towards the earth and the things of this world. It is then that they become easy prey for the wolves and so like John the Baptist he must forever be calling them to repentance. His mind must be like that of a dog; senses heightened and alert to the approach of any danger warning those in his charge. 

As a true physician of souls, he must not only have the capacity to diagnose the malady, but the instruments necessary to heal the wounds of others. He must understand the seriousness of the ailment and the right kind of remedy in order that he does not make things worse or fail to apply what is needed to bring an individual back to the fullness of health. He cannot be squeamish or hesitant in offering the diagnosis or applying the remedy. For he knows that he must give answer to the Master for the care he has given.

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Both in the stories that we are told from the lives of the fathers and from the particular teachings that they offer their spiritual sons, we begin to get into the nitty-gritty of the struggle with the passion of lust and fornication. Again what we are presented with is the fierceness of the battle. Part of the reason for this is that the soul has implanted in it by nature a proclivity towards certain pleasures. Saint Anthony the great tells us that it does not act, however, without the heart so desiring. Desire as we’ve so often discussed is essential in the spiritual life. We have a keen sense of our lack and incompleteness outside of God. In this sense, all of our desires as human beings are reflection of our great desire for God and for what He alone can satisfy. 

This proclivity towards certain pleasures can begin to take hold of the soul when we are over-attentive to nourishing our bodies with food and drink. In our tendency towards excess our hearts can be taken over by the desire for fleshly pleasure. 

When we find ourselves repeatedly seeking out pleasures as an end in themselves then we become vulnerable to the provocation of the demons due to their envy. They can try to stir up the fleshly desires in order to distract us from the things of God and the remembrance of God. 

It is so important for us who struggle in the spiritual life to know well the difference between these sources of our proclivity toward sensuality. We cannot allow ourselves to be ignorant of their causes and the many ways that they manifest themselves. We must learn how to confront our temptations as well as to embrace the remedies that the fathers put before us.

It is important for us to understand that much of the spiritual battle plays itself out on a psychological level and the means of warfare begins with the thoughts. When we lack watchfulness and allow ourselves to daydream and entertain every kind of thought and image, we find that our memory and our imagination become the holding place of so many things that come back to afflict us in the spiritual battle.

Therefore, we will discover in the coming months that such a spiritual battle is only won through the grace of God and constant of prayer. The spiritual life is not about endurance but rather humility. We engage in the ascetical life because we know our poverty. We must exercise our faith to the fullest extent in order that God’s grace might bear the greatest fruit possible within our hearts.

As we come to the end of the Ladder of Divine Ascent St. John unfolds for us the heights to which we are drawn – the theological virtues of Faith, Hope and Love. Hope, often the most neglected of virtues, is the annulment of despair. It allows us to hold on to the promise of Christ to be with us always. Even when faith seems to fail us and all grows dark because of the cross that we carry, our hope in the Lord allows us to be consoled by his mercy and to be drawn forward. It protects us from despondency and doubt.

Love when unimpeded allows us to see as God sees; to see the signs of the times and how things will unfold even when all seems chaotic. This divine love yields miracles; the supernatural healing and perfecting the natural. Through it we come to see the things of the kingdom with clarity. This clarity creates a fire within the heart; an urgent longing and thirst for the Lord that only he can quench. It is our movement into eternity. It reveals to us that the kingdom is now, heaven is now, eternity is now! We come to see that this love is not distant but that the kingdom dwells within. 

St. John closes the step by calling out to Love Himself to satisfy his desire, to show him the path of the ascent that is most direct. For even though he had received this wisdom from others, St. John understands that it is only Love himself who can guide us. It is the experience of this love alone that moves us from words to reality.

Finally, St. John exhorts us along with all those who read his book to ascend eagerly and to be resolved in their hearts to strive for the Lord above all things. He is our life, our salvation, our love!

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Tonight once again we are immersed in the struggle for purity of heart and the avoidance of its opposite in action, fornication. We are presented, of course, with heroic examples of those who embodied this virtue. Yet the most powerful thing that stands out both in the examples and the writings of the fathers is their understanding of Eros being conquered by Divine Eros; that is, our attachment to the things of this world and are very selves overcome by a greater love - the love of God for us. 

When we begin to see and taste this love within our day-to-day life, and when we experience a greater measure of freedom through the ascetic life, that Divine love begins to grow within us and we find ourselves running with a swiftness aided by the grace of God. 

Love is always the more powerful motivator and there is nothing more powerful than to experience the love of the one who created us in His own image and likeness. He alone can satisfy the deepest longings of the human heart. Once we begin to let go of the illusion that this world places before us - the illusion that it can provide for all of us are pleasures; and once the grace of God begins also to purify the memory, we begin to experience the invincible joy, peace, and humility of the kingdom. 

As long as we are in this world, we all always find ourselves embattled. Therefore, the fathers tell us to cry out like David in the psalms: “Deliver me, O my joy, from them that have compassed me about.“ At that moment, we will always find ourselves in the hands of the living God.

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What do we live for? Or rather, better stated, Who do we live for? As we come to the end of the Ladder of Divine Ascent, St. John speaks to us about the nature of Divine Love that is our destiny and dignity in Christ. We pursue the spiritual life for no abstract reason - not for moral perfection - not to satisfy a sense of religious duty. Nor are we driven by fear or anxiety as has sadly so often been the case. 

It has always been Love that beckons us forward, that gradually heals the wounds of our sin or the traumas that we have borne. Anything that obstructs our vision of love and the mercy, God desires to overcome. God has created us for himself, made us in his own image and likeness precisely that we might share in the fullness of his life. The nature of love is curative not punitive. 

St. John begins by speaking of those who keep in their imagination the face of the beloved and embrace it tenderly. This love often is so strong that it strips them even of the need for sleep or for food. The one who yearns for God says: “My soul thirsts for God, the mighty, the living God. The grace of this reality transforms nature to the point that even their countenance changes and is filled with the joy and the peace of the kingdom.

Furthermore, the pure of heart, the one who loves without impediment, is the truth theologian and so grasp the very nature of the most holy trinity. Their heart transformed by love shows itself in their love of neighbor, their intolerance for slander or anything that might diminish the other.

St. John also tells us that the power of love is in hope because by it we await the reward of love. Even when we cannot see, when we find ourselves wrapped in the darkness of the cross that we carry, it is in hope that we find rest and the reassurance of God‘s love for us .

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Why is it that we engage in the ascetic life and the spiritual life as a whole?  How is it that we come to understand the extreme practices of the desert fathers as they entered into the struggle with the passions? Seemingly they were willing to do almost anything to overcome temptation and to suffer extreme disciplines, punishing the body, until the passions were overcome.

Again, we must understand that the desert was a laboratory. The fathers were driven there by their desire to live for God and to live for Him completely. Of course, they entered into these exercises with an imperfect understanding. Yet, in reading the Evergetinos we are blessed to see the development of their understanding and practice; how it becomes more measured and more focused upon God and the grace he provides.

Beyond this, however, they were engaging in this way of life not simply in the pursuit of certain principles. Nor were they seeking to overcome their natural flaws and defects. They understood the struggle was also with demonic provocation. Therefore, they were not simply trying to foster good habits or to acquire a taste for that which was more virtuous. They understood that the spiritual life involved a bloody warfare against evil. The shadow of the Cross always falls over our struggles and stands as a reminder of the costs of sin. To overcome sin and its consequence, Christ sweat blood in the garden of Gethsemane and was obedient unto death on the cross. The spiritual life is formed and shaped by the Paschal Mystery. It involves always a dying to self and rising to new life in Christ. To strip it of this understanding is to make our spiritual life and practices impotent. We are to be conformed to Christ in every way. We preached Jesus Christ and him crucified not only in words, but in our day-to-day struggle against sin and the passions.

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What does it mean to be drawn into the mystery of Divine Love? Even as beautifully as John writes, it is difficult to wrap our minds around the experience of the living God; the experience of a love that is free of every impediment and passion, a love that makes us sons and daughters of God and so shapes are identity in such a way that it is unshakable. 

What is it that can overcome such a love? Our identity is often shaped by anxieties and fears, the unexpected and unknown, and our insecurities. Yet, as we are immersed in the love of God, all fear dissipates and is overtaken by an urgent longing for God and the thirst for his love. 

We often resist opening ourselves up and becoming vulnerable to this love. One famous author wrote, “humankind can only bear so much reality.“ Yet the love of God, the more that it is experienced, allows us to run toward that reality rather than avoid it . It  reveals to us that even our weaknesses, the things that we perhaps hate about ourselves or the wounds that we bear, draw us toward him. Love reveals to us that we experience nothing in isolation. Christ is always present to us and within us. This being so allows us to offer Him all that we are without shame.

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Tonight we read the final sections on the fathers’ reflection on the practice of fasting. Once again the focus is on decorum; how does one eat in the presence of others while not giving himself over to pride. It is ever so easy to think oneself the great ascetic and hold oneself above others within the community. Ego can even distort well-practiced discipline into something that sets oneself apart from others rather than leads one to show greater desire for God, virtue and mercy towards others. 

All of our practices, the fathers teach us, must be guided by spirit of gratitude. We give thanks for the food that we receive and that nourishes us and we avoid criticizing others for how much they eat. Self discipline is not a weapon to be wielded by the ego for its own pleasure. Our tendency is to devour our brothers’ flesh by our criticism, and as the psalmist tells us to “eat up God’s people as if eating our bread.”

A humble attitude must be fostered, and we must not be ill-mannered. For example, a senior monk within a monastery must not demand honor or reverence or put on airs before his juniors. He must not draw attention to Himself in any way that would diminish charity among the brothers. What is the value of toiling all day only to undermine oneself to satisfy petty pride?

Again, the fathers want us to understand that fasting and all of our disciplines are about love. We must not diminish the practice by becoming legalistic or moralistic in our view. Therefore, we are taught not to takes oaths about avoiding certain foods. In doing so we set aside the freedom that is ours. No food is reprehensible. We are merely to eat with restraint and gratitude. But if we take an oath and then break it by eating the particular food we fall into perjury. As Christ tells us, no food is unclean; rather it is what comes out of the heart that makes a person unclean or sinful.

A rather lengthy discussion ensued in regards to avoiding a kind of ghetto mentality in our Christian practice; setting ourselves apart from others rather than serving them in the love of Christ. It is a narrow line that we walk and demands that we understand that all is grace. Christ has taken on our poverty and emptied himself in order that we might know the fullness of life and love. Our exercise of the faith, that is, our asceticism, must be relational; it must be directed toward Christ and enable us to love as He loves. Asceticism is not an end in itself, nor do we live out our Christianity in isolation. We turn to Christ, we die to sin and self, in order to be raised to life in him. To avoid the kind of isolationism that we would see in the scribes and Pharisees, we must become Christ.

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We are brought to the denouement of the Ladder in these final steps on Dispassion and the “Trinity of Virtues” - Faith, Hope and Love. The words of St. John ring forth as if from the mouth of a poet. It is only one who has experience of and has seen the beauty of Divine love who can then speak of the urgent longing that begins to take over the soul when it no longer is held back by the weight of sin or one’s ego.

The dispassionate man, St. John tells us, no longer lives himself, but Christ lives in him. He has eyes only for the beloved and living in constant union with him.  All becomes Grace; Christ’s virtue becomes our virtue, Christ’s strength becomes our strength, Christ’s love becomes our love. 

Understanding this we must not allow anything to hold us back. Above all we should desire to enter into the bridal chamber; for this is exactly what Christ has made possible for us. Our relationship with God is often described with nuptial imagery; we are destined to become one with the most holy Trinity. What excuse could we possibly put forward for not at least seeking to break through the wall of our sin by embracing the forgiveness that is so freely offered?

St. John’s discussion of dispassion leads us to the final step of the Ladder. The theological virtues, named so because they have God as their end, become St. John’s subject matter. These three are preeminent because they endure unto eternity. The greatest of them, love, allows no respite for the soul but drives her on with a kind of blessed madness. Overcome with an urgent longing for the Beloved it takes on a greater resemblance to God in so far as this is possible. The soul becomes inebriated - so often does it seek to satisfy its thirst for divine love. Having satisfied this desire the heart expands, taking on  distinctive properties where it becomes a fountain of faith, an abyss of patience and a sea of humility. What takes place then is extraordinary: love banishes every thought of evil or judgment. Only mercy, forgiveness and compassion remain.

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We have continued to make our way through the final few hypotheses about fasting and eating in general. What is gradually coming to light is that our relationship with Christ and our identity in Him is to form and fashion every aspect of our lives. This includes what we might consider the most mundane aspects of our life or what we take for granted, such as eating and common meals. 

What becomes perfectly clear in this hypothesis, however, is that there is a specific decorum that emerged in the practice of the fathers. The way that they looked at food and the way that they ate their common meals was all shaped by their greater commitment to the life of prayer and silence. The ascetical life shaped their actions and supported their pursuit of the ultimate goal. Thus eating, the quality of the food, the mannerisms at table and amount of food that other monks ate and the general behavior during meals all became important matters and subject to proper formation. 

The ideal was not to form a Christian gentleman, but rather to form a heart that was watchful at all times of the day and that was very much aware of the power of our most basic appetites. We see restraint being taught; that is, slowing oneself down at meals and not being driven by the pressure of hunger or the allure of delicious food. It is Christ the Bread of Life that one is always seeking and so the way that we approach our meals should be a reflection of how we approach the Lord in the Holy Mysteries. Our mindset, our sense of gratitude, the solemnity of our attitudes and behaviors are all reflection of our understanding of the connection with the Paschal Mystery. When we think of our own formation we must have this broad scope so that we do not treat our ascetic practices as ends in themselves. All that we do must be offered to God or it is wasted.

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St. John understands that we are out of our depths whenever we try to capture with words what comes through experience. This is true in particular of the heights of prayer, contemplation, and with dispassion. John’s language is poetic and thus a reflection of his straining to present us with the end of the spiritual life and what the heart longs for the most.

In concluding his teachings on prayer, he warns us of certain pitfalls to avoid in order that our focus might remain upon Christ. Above all he does not want us to become discouraged by the attack of the evil one. Such a thing is to be expected. Prayer is so beautiful and transformative that the demons are going to do everything they can to disrupt it. Yet, John would have us understand that the demons are scourged by prayer and when we show fortitude they flee. Finally, he would have be confident in the practice of prayer. There is nothing that one can write in a book that is necessary when we have God himself as the Teacher of prayer. It is the Holy Spirit that searches the depths of God the guides us forward.

Dispassion is even more difficult to capture with mere words for it describes one who has made his flesh incorruptible and has subdued all the senses; keeping his soul before the face of the Lord and always straining towards him. One is not only detached from the things of this world but has a gathered an exhaustible store of virtue as a source of strength. They are driven no longer by fear, but now only love; love that cannot be understood by mere reason. The soul is drawn forward by an urgent longing that belongs only to those who are created in the image and likeness of God. Therefore, St. John sees dispassion as purity of heart; where a person has reached a level of existence where sin has no hold upon them and there is no longer even any awareness of the presence of demons. Such an individual is wholly united with God and always will be.

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It’s important for us as we read the fathers and consider the discipline that they embraced regarding our appetites and desires that we do not demonize these realities or fall into extreme practices. At the heart of the fathers’ lives and teachings is desire; allowing the love of God and gratitude for his gifts to guide and direct their understanding of life and perception of reality. 

It is true that the desert was every bit the laboratory; the fathers often pushed themselves in extreme ways in order that their appetites and their desires for satisfaction and pleasure would lose their grip upon them. They were often harsh with themselves in ways that seem abhorrent to modern sensibilities. 

Yet they realized that these realities are very powerful parts of our humanity. The body, for example, through the ascetic life can be a powerful aid in our sanctification. However, if we approach our appetites in an unmeasured fashion, or in a way that is simply focused upon the self, then that which is most beautiful can be corrupted.

Thus, our own embrace of the ascetic life should be rooted in desire; our sense of lack and incompleteness outside of God. Our truest identity is established and found only in Him. Such a vision must be fostered from the earliest years of our lives. For it is not something that one can give or share with another. It comes only through experience. One comes to love the disciplines of which the father speak (fasting, prayer, vigils etc.) because they are far more than mere disciplines. They open up the path for us to experience the invincible joy and peace and freedom of the Kingdom. “Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.”

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As St. John draws us more deeply into his understanding of prayer and the experience of intimacy with God, he begins to emphasize the importance of maintaining purity of heart and humility. Either through negligence or through demonic provocation, we can find ourselves being driven not by the Holy Spirit toward God but rather driven by the desires of the flesh. The vulnerability of prayer, opening our minds and our hearts to God, also carries with it the need to have established watchfulness of heart. If we have not we can indiscriminately open ourselves up to certain dangers. For example, we may allow our mind to wander during prayer in such a way that we turn away from God. It can even happen that in this turning away we are move towards the enemies of God. Like Judas we can share most intimately with the Lord at the table of the holy Eucharist and then immediately be driven out by an unholy spirit into the darkness. It is those who are closest to Christ who often betray him the most. 

We all take certain things for granted. This is true in our relationship with God. We can treat that relationship cheaply; enter into it with a kind of familiarity to the point that we lose sight of the preciousness of what God has made possible for us. Our attachment to the things of this world or to individuals can fill our minds and our hearts even during the time of prayer. Therefore, John wants us to have no illusions about what it is that we ask for and seek in prayer. Our greatest desire should be what leads us to God and what endures unto eternity. As Saint James tell us: “we ask, but we do not receive because we ask wrongly.” We seek only the satisfy our natural wants and desires.  As it has been said, “The fool’s portion is small in his eyes.” Often we do not see the beauty of what God offers us.

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It may seem surprising that the fathers spend so much time speaking about food and how we approach eating. Yet the needs of the flesh are very much a part of who we are as human beings. So how we eat and what we eat can affect what goes on internally. We can be subject to disorder or extremes in one fashion or another. 

What we see in the desert fathers and mothers is a love of fasting because they saw it as the insurer and foundation of the other virtues. In other words, when one can order an appetite and a desire towards what is good and specifically as tied to our hunger for God, then we are able to do so with other aspects of our humanity and our other appetites. Eating, being one of the most basic needs can lead us in one of two directions; either it is the gateway vice that opens us up to be more vulnerable to disordered appetites, or our restriction of our diet can turn us toward God who satisfies the deepest longings of the human heart.

The fathers examine the practice of eating from multiple perspectives. They had an acute sense of the subtlety with which the mind approaches such a practice. We can be hyper-focused upon the body and its needs. We can use illness as an excuse for slothfulness or to eat beyond our needs or what health demands. Likewise, we can become overly focused upon the quality of food and only want what is pleasing to the pallet or perfectly fresh. We lose sight of the fact that what we prize so much passes into the latrine. It may satisfy the pallet but it does not give rest to the soul.

The fathers also understood that we must give ourselves over to this practice without over-analyzing its value. Our tendency to pamper the body can make us and our consciences become callous and lead us down the path to hedonism. We lose sight of the fact that this appetite is incited by everything in the culture around us that has made food an idol. It has also made it a medicine in the sense that we turned to it to find solace and comfort. In a subtle way we are being taught to avoid affliction at any cost and to question the redeeming nature of the cross.

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Above all St. John’s writing on prayer works to break through the myopic vision that we have of life, of prayer, and of God.  Like so many of the fathers, he will hammer away at anything which prevents us from experiencing the fullness of God’s love and mercy. Thus, he both rebukes and encourages. 

We began this evening with a warning about admitting fantasies into our mind and heart during prayer. The demonic provocation at such times will be to use religious ideas, visions, etc., to distract us from the beloved and the encounter with him in silence. However, John tells us, if we hold fast to this prayer we are given an invincible assurance; there is a loss of all doubt and the certainty of God’s love is all that remains. The encounter with God Himself is proof of the unprovable!

We must give great care to put on the mind of Christ. We must be merciful as our Heavenly Father is merciful. To allow ourselves even to think of justice is going to immediately pull us down. For there is no justice! What has been revealed to us is unconditional love, mercy, and compassion. To turn a harsh eye toward another is to turn our eyes away from God.

Furthermore, we must allow God in his providence to set both the time and measure of prayer. We cannot treat it as something that anything else in our life is equal to in importance. This is especially true in those blessed moments where God fills the heart with compunction and the eyes with tears that cleanse the soul. We must not break away or abandoned prayer until we see that by divine Providence both the fervor and tears have diminished. “For perhaps you will not have such a moment for the remission of your sins again in all your life.“ We must always choose the one thing necessary.

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We continued this evening to delve more deeply into the fathers’ understanding of the practice of fasting. Once again we see that they learned from experience that it is better to eat once a day but not to the point of satiation. One must be measured and restrained in the practice, so is not to become weak and incapable of work or of fulfilling one’s prayer rule. 

We also began to see that there was variance in the practices embraced by various monks, both in terms of their diet and the amount they ate. The practice was not to pamper the body but also not to destroy it. The body is necessary in the spiritual battle. Thus one must be discerning in one’s spiritual practice and patient. 

We were also introduced this evening to the particular temptations that arise throughout the course of one’s spiritual life. Again, we must realize that we struggle not only with our own natural weaknesses and the weakness of our sin, but also with temptations and provocations that come to us from the Evil One. We are often tempted by what we see. We covet what appeals to the eyes and seems to promise enjoyment or satisfaction. We hear stories of the father’s catching themselves being tempted to break the rule of fasting. 

What is needed is humility. Fasting is a discipline and when we fail we are to humbly acknowledge it and confess it. We must never be tempted after having fallen to hide our failure or lie about it. It is then that we are truly in the grip of the father of lies and will be further led astray by even greater deception.

Finally, we were taught that there are certain passions that we must be willing to cut out of our life completely. There are certain things that have such a hold on our hearts and enslave our wills that there must be the courage and the willingness to remove it from our lives completely. We must always be willing to choose the better part and to sacrifice all for that pearl great price.

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What is prayer and, more importantly, what do we become by engaging in prayer? So often we take a reductive view of the realities in our life, including the reality of our relationship with God. We reduce our converse with God to a discipline or an afterthought or worse and obligation. And yet as we read the fathers, we begin to see with greater clarity that prayer involves a kind of mutual vulnerability. We stand before the Other, God, withholding nothing of ourselves from him. In this, we imitate Him who has revealed himself to us in the most vulnerable fashion. He has drawn back the veil and revealed his heart to us and the depth of his love and compassion. 

Such a vision of prayer precludes are treating it in a common fashion; approaching it like we would any other interaction. However, what we are drawn into from the moment of our baptism is the very life of God, a participation in the life of the most holy Trinity. Prayer, then, becomes an expression of identity, of who we are as human beings and what we’ve become in Christ. Seen in such a manner, an unquenchable thirst should arise within the human heart to remain in prayer and prolong it. One desires to linger long with the Beloved. It is to choose the better part. So much of what we learn, and our taught leads only to the fragmentation of the self. The frenetic pace of life and the desperate pursuit to satisfy expectations that we have for ourselves or that others place upon us distorts who we really are. We are sons and daughters of God, heir to the kingdom of heaven, and the Spirit that dwells within the heart alone gives us the capacity to express the love God Himself has for us.

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We continued our reading of the Evergetinos this evening with hypotheses 19 and 20. Once again we find ourselves considering the fathers’ teaching on eating and our use of food. Part of the reason they spend so much time on this subject is because they understand the meaning that food has for us as human beings and that it often goes well beyond that of nourishment. We come into this world and our first and earliest experience is that of being suckled; fed at the breast of our mother and thereby comforted. On a psychological level, food can continue to have this meaning. That is not necessarily something bad. There is a form of communion that we have with each other when we have a common meal. Indeed, this is why Christ gives himself to us as Eucharist. However, in our sin, the desire for food can be driven more by the emotional needs that we have in our day-to-day struggles. The fathers understood that the psychological reality affects us spiritually. 

Over and over again, we can turn to the things of this world to satisfy the longing of the human heart that God alone can fill. Christ is the Bread of Life and he alone can nourish us upon his love. Thus the fathers, especially those who entered into the desert, became acutely aware of the need to be watchful of this bodily hunger. When we lose our watchfulness or when we relax our disciplines, once again we can move towards satisfying ourselves through the things of this world. 

Food can become an idol. The monks understood that even in our religiosity we can be tempted to celebrate feasts in such a way that we cast aside all that was gained through fasting. What worth is it to fast 40 days of Lent then only to turn around and eat excessively for 50 days until Pentecost?

The fathers also identified another danger. Our religious sensibilities and identity can be just strong enough that they lead us to want to maintain the illusion of holiness and discipline. The fathers warn us about the temptation to secret eating. Hiding the truth from others as well as from oneself only prevents repentance. In order to hold on to the illusion and false image of the self, we can destroy ourselves spiritually.

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The very words of St. John Climacus seem to carry us up to heights hitherto unknown and unexpected. The experience of this ascent takes place as we feel our hearts begin to burn for love of God and the desire for him in prayer. 

St. John quickly moves us away from looking at prayer as a mere discipline and rather our being drawn into the depths of Mystery, the very Mystery of the Triune God.  The act of praying is a blessing in and of itself. To enter into this converse with God is also to experience the action of the Spirit within our hearts, the groans of Love that are beyond words.  

In all of this, St. John reshapes are understanding of the nature of prayer. It is not a discipline but an expression of our true nature in Christ. We are to become prayer, consumed by love for the Lord; anxious to show that love and treat it cheaply. 

Faith, St. John tells us, gives wings to prayer. Through it we see with clarity our hearts’ desire. An urgent longing takes hold of the heart that seeks quick satisfaction; that is, seeks to take hold of the Beloved without delay.

Synopsis of tonight’s group on the Evergetinos- Hypothesis 18 Sections H and I:

This evening we concluded hypothesis 18 with the clarity that only St. John Cassian can bring. Cassian, though as western monk, spent many years in Egypt among the desert fathers and was able to distill their thought with great clarity for the western mind as well as the western monk. He shows us what the practice, or as he says, the vast experience of the monks over the course of time offers us. They show us that we are to avoid extremes. Fasting is not to be extended over the course of many days because the immoderate practice of fasting leads to the immoderate break of the fast and over-eating. Fasting is to be embraced, not as an end in itself, but as a means to bringing about both internal and external stability to a confused and unruly life. There is only one hard and fast rule and that is not to eat to the point of satiation. In fact, we must understand the uniqueness of each individual in regard to their experience in the ascetic life and the strength of their constitution. Not everybody can restrain the amount of food they eat to the same extent. Nor can everyone live a strictly vegan diet.

Cassian also notes that illness does not come into conflict with purity of heart. It may demand that we lighten our discipline for the sake of the health of the body. But even here we should eat in moderation and whatever the illness demands without making ourselves slaves to the assaults of evil desires. “The moderate and logical use of food ensures the health of the body; it does not detract from holiness.” Once again the fathers prove themselves to be both spiritually and psychologically astute as well as having a clear understanding of the physiological needs that we have as human beings.

Fasting in many way is starting point for us and not only serves us in the struggle for purity of heart by humbling the mind and the body, but it also reveals to us that the spiritual life must involve the whole person. We begin with the basics and our most fundamental need – the need for sustenance. A confused mind is born out of disorder, and this brings confusion to the soul, and from that purity slowly disappears. Much of the turmoil that we experience in our life arises out of the loss of peace that comes from a disordered life. However, when this order emerges within us and we begin to taste something of the peace of Christ, then something is born within the human heart. The Fathers tells us that from the light of peace a pure wind blows through the mind. To the extent that the heart can draw near to wisdom, it receives grace from God. Thus fasting may not seem to be necessary or important in our generation, but for the fathers it lays the very foundation of a life that is caught up in Christ and transformed by his grace.

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Joy! Suddenly, as we read through the Ladder of Dive Ascent every cross, every struggle in the spiritual life, while still present, begins to fade into the background. The costs involved in this struggle pales in comparison to the blessings and the fruits that God bestows upon us, especially prayer .

St. John places before us the essentials of prayer - as well as what can undermine it. We continue to struggle to confine our thoughts and then to completely still the mind and the heart. When this takes place, prayer becomes perfection and rapture in the Lord. 

This joy, however, especially among the anchorites is marked by humility. One does not expose the deepest elements of the most intimate relationship indiscriminately with others. In any case, it would be impossible to do so. As we are drawn along in faith, as we begin to encounter and experience God as he is in himself, words fail us.

What we must do is hold on to what is precious. Imperfections and anxieties can pull us away from God and our trust in his love. Furthermore the evil one is ever set on disrupting that relationship. Plotting and conniving as he is, he will stir an emotion within our heart; or influence another to engage us in such a way so as to agitate or distract. But we must keep our eyes upon the Beloved. 

St. John asks, “For what have I in heaven? Nothing. And what have I desired on earth beside Thee? Nothing, but to cling continually to Thee in prayer without distraction.”  Hearing these words, one can never look upon prayer simply as an activity or discipline. It is life. It is love. We are to become prayer.

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No one is going to take up the practice of fasting or come to “love fasting” as we have often spoken of unless they are taught by those who have deep and long experience in the practice. As we have seen the desert was very much laboratory. Those who entered into it were driven by the desire for the Lord and to remove any impediment to that desire. 

Yet, we see in the writings of the Evergetinos a natural progression, an organic progression, in the practice. Their zeal for the Lord often led the monks to engage in the practice of fasting with great strictness and to radically humble the body. However, they quickly learned that to practice even that which is good in an imprudent and unmeasured fashion was dangerous. To fall into exhaustion from fasting too long could make it impossible for a person to remain awake to engage in the practice of prayer or, similarly, weaken their watchfulness of mind such that they become vulnerable to the provocation of sinful thoughts. 

The desert fathers also had to learn that fasting was but an implement. It is necessary for the cultivation of the heart, but it must be accompanied by constant prayer and bear the fruit of love for God and virtue. Therefore, the Evergetinos places us in a privileged position. We are able to sit at the feet of the great elders of old and to learn from the errors and the pitfalls that can cripple us in the spiritual life as well as to be inspired by the fathers’ great sanctity. The spiritual struggle is rarely neat and the path ahead is often hidden to us. The desert fathers are shining light in an age of spiritual darkness and lack of guidance. Thanks be to God for such a precious gift.

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There are some things that cannot be learned from books – prayer most of all! However, St. John, as so many of the Saints speaks to us from long experience as one who truly has seen Christ, knows Christ and has conversed with him deeply. Whatever might be lacking in his thought it still stokes the fire of desire within any heart that longs for God. 

The desert fathers understood that God looks upon us as his sons and daughters his children, and the simplest word or groan from the heart is sufficient to express our need and love. Above all, we are to have gratitude and a spirit of compunction. With these then we approach the Lord with the intentions of our hearts. 

We should not fear our own weakness or the multiplicity of our thoughts that seem to overwhelm us. St. John reminds us that He who “sets the bounds to the sea of the mind will visit us, and during our prayer will say to the waves thus far shall you come and no further.” 

Prayer should be the simplest of things, but also what we hold to be most precious. We should come to see it as necessary as breathing but even more essential. The fathers tell us that we are to become prayer - our life is to be a sacrifice of praise. We are to be the very reflection of Christ. The kingdom is now, heaven is now and dwells within us. May our foolish hearts take hold of the gift that the Beloved offers us so freely.

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We picked up this evening with the beginning of hypothesis 18. For weeks now we have been reading about the essential practice of fasting. The cultivation of virtue and the overcoming of the passions is impossible without it. Making use of the body to strengthen the soul is a necessity. But we quickly realize from the stories that this practice can become imbalanced; monks could fall into extremes and be tempted to engage in disciplines in ways that feed the ego – ways that make them feel holy or religious. 

Yet the desert was a great teacher. The monks learned in this laboratory the subtle movements not only of the mind and the heart, but the way the demons tempt us to extremes. To fast for three or four days serves only to weaken the body and this can disrupt one’s spiritual practices as well as one make one ill. It can also, fill the heart with pride. In this, the gains made in the life of virtue can be lost in an instant. 

Therefore, the fathers begin to understand that fasting must be practiced with restraint, measure, and good wisdom. We must never lose sight of the fact that our fasting is tied to Christ and who he is for us. He is the beloved, the heavenly bridegroom, and our fasting and the hunger it produces must be tied in our minds and our hearts to our desire for Christ, the bread of life. He alone satisfies the deepest longings of the human heart. Therefore fasting is not meant to kill the body, but rather re-order our desires toward their true end. Fasting then is to be done with regularity, extending no more than one day. We begin simply by not eating to the point of satiation. We give the body what is necessary, but no more. In all of this we are taught that the royal path to purity of heart is fasting and that light burdens are also profitable.

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As St. John Climacus comes to the end of the step on stillness and segues into the step on prayer, it is as if he is beckoning us with every word to enter into silence and to give ourselves over to prayer; not as a discipline but rather as a response to the gift of God’s love. We are so often filled with a hunger that is inexplicable to us. We seek to nourish ourselves upon the things of this world indiscriminately - only to find them sadly insufficient. We pathetically move on to something else that captures our attention. The world constantly tells us that it has “some thing” that will fill that void within our hearts. 

Therefore, St. John begins to define for us the mother of virtues – prayer. Not once does John describe prayer as a discipline but rather lays out before us all that it promises. The world sees it perhaps as a waste of time or an escape from reality. However, John makes it clear that the union prayer establishes with God upholds the very fabric of the world and opens the door to reconciliation with God. It becomes the cure and the healing balm for the deepest sorrows of human existence. 

Those realities that we experience during our life that are most painful are healed by being drawn into the eternal life and love of God - a God who has taken every bit of this suffering upon himself and permeates it. Prayer is our greatest treasure! May God give us the grace in the coming weeks to see and understand this.

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One of the most wonderful things that someone said in the group tonight was: “I am amazed at how simple it all is!”  And they are absolutely right in their observation. All that the fathers tell us - about the struggle for purity of heart and overcoming the passions, seeking stillness and constancy in prayer - comes down to one simple reality. 

God is love and that all run but “one receives the prize without effort!” He who humbles himself will be exalted. The moment we turn the mind and the heart to God and - even prior to that - the mere existence of humility in our hearts leads God to lift us up to gaze upon him face-to-face. It is like a child who has no illusions about his self-worth or identity, but simply reaches out for the parent and is lifted up immediately in love!

It is this love that the hesychast seeks above all things; the eye of the heart is constantly turned toward and seeking the Belived. What is the one thing necessary that our Lord speaks about in the gospel? Mary sat at his feet being nourished upon his words of love and his presence. This is the better part. We so often complicate our lives and spend years and decades pursuing what the false self tells us that we need or where we will find dignity and the fullness of life. In the end, there is no ladder! There is only love and the urgent longing that makes us strive for it.

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The desert was a laboratory. The monks went into its depths precisely to push the limits of what they needed in order to sustain themselves; whether it be food, water or sleep. Therefore, we must not find ourselves put off by the stories that seem so extreme. Quite simply, they were extreme!

The desert being a laboratory, compelled the monks not only to evaluate their motives but also the restraint and measure that was necessary in order not to fall into extremes where they would hurt themselves physically or spiritually. Wisdom is hard won. The generations of monks who lived in the desert offer us a profoundly astute understanding of the human person, our needs, our motivations, and what strengthens or harm us in the spiritual life. 

They often learned through error. Sometimes their judgment or lack thereof was a source of profound humility. In the coming weeks, we will be presented with the greater wisdom and balance that began to emerge out of this lengthy experience.

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St. John draws us into the experience of stillness and its many fruits. It is a precious gift that comes to us by the grace of God and takes root in a heart prepared through years of asceticism and watchfulness. It is our waiting upon God. 

In many ways this sums up the vocation of the hermit/monk. But it also captures the essence of our life and the life of prayer. We are ever waiting upon God to act in our life and we seek to cultivate in our hearts a receptivity to his will and grace. This is the active life, the fulfillment of the vocation for the Hesychast and of all Christians. 

The temptations that come are always going to be things that draw one out of that stillness; loneliness, despondency, etc.  Whether monk or Christians in the world we must allow ourselves to remain within the crucible of stillness. When we feel lonely and isolated, when we are agitated, our tendency is to run to others or to things within the world. This crucible purifies the desire of our hearts and our faith. 

Are we able to give our will over to God? Can we trust that he will make of our lives that which endures to eternity? So often we are set upon fixing, undoing or changing the circumstances of our life that seem inconsistent with what is good or what will lead to a sense of fulfillment. However, when we long for God and when we turn to his love, we become free from being tossed about by the chaos of life. Our hearts find rest only in the Lord - He who is an eternal rock.

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We continued our discussion of the fathers’ love for abstinence and fasting. While their feats seem amazing to us as well as how little food they needed to sustain themselves, the importance is what this love of these disciplines show us. They were not embraced simply as forms of discipline or endurance, but rather that which humbled the mind and the body. It is counterintuitive for all of those who live in times of great abundance to imagine that radically limiting both the amount and type of food that we eat could have such great significance for the spiritual life. At one point, the practices are compared to David slaying a lion in the protection of his flock. Fasting allows us to put our trust in God, and so becomes a weapon capable of slaying a far more fierce enemy. Similarly, David rushed out to do battle with Goliath with nothing but a sling and a few stones. Likewise, we rush out in battle, unencumbered by the things of this world caring with us the humble weapons of fasting and constant prayer.

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The fathers often draw us along this mysterious path, the narrow path, that leads to the kingdom. They lead us, as it were, “where angels fear to tread.”  They show us in an unvarnished fashion how the path to Godly love and virtue passes through affliction. 

Yet, even that is too simplistic. It is the suffering heart, the heart crushed by prayer and the desire for God, that gives birth to virtue. One cannot have God sorrow and suffering if he does not first cherish the causes of these. 

It is here that we must pray for the illumination that comes through faith. For we are told fear of God and the reproof of one’s conscience give birth to this godly sorrow. Abstinence and vigil keep company with a suffering heart and strengthen it to remain upon this path. Gluttony in all of its forms gives rise to the bad blood of the passions, and drives out the influx of the Spirit. 

Thus, while we are young, we must learn to delight in what comes from the labor of compunction. If we do not, we will simply provoke confusion and callousness in the heart. We will be frustrated and lose our desire for God. Knowledge of God and the things of God do not reside in the hedonist; and the one who loves his body will not acquire the grace of God. 

There is a plethora of ways that we idolize the body and its needs. It is for this reason that we are given multiple stories of elders crushing the demons by their asceticism. They starve the demons by not allowing them to feed upon the disordered and the unholy desires that often dwell within our hearts. If a man spends his life in fasting, then his adversaries, the passions and the demons flee, enfeebled, from his soul.

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St. John Climacus once again gives us powerful images to help us understand the meaning of stillness and how it is to be protected. One such image is that of an eyelash that falls into the eye and creates irritation. The enemy of stillness is agitation; we are often driven to distraction by a concern for our physical and emotional well-being. Fear can create within us a kind of hypochondria. We become hypersensitive to our health and well-being. Unchecked, this fear can be become so excessive that it creates a massive neurosis that prevent us from trusting in the providence and promises of God. We no longer feel ourselves being drawn along by love or seeking to remain in that stillness in order that we might know intimacy with the beloved. Rather, we desperately push forward, driving ourselves to the point of exhaustion, seeking a worldly peace and security. 

However, in this we deprive ourselves of a childlike sense of wonder at the life and love the God has made possible for us. Therefore, as Christ tells us, we may not experience the kingdom even though it dwells within us because we are focused upon controlling our life and shaping our own identity. Once the simplicity is lost, it can lead to a kind of quiet desperation. Our hearts long for love from others and from God, but in the complexity that we have created and the thick hedge of responsibilities with which we surround ourselves, we lose faith and hope that such freedom can ever be ours again.

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What is it that we are hungry for in this world? So many of the writings of the fathers can be reduced to this very question. What is the deepest desire of our hearts? What have we been created for and what satisfies the sense of incompleteness or the strange feeling of nostalgia within us? 

Because we have been created for God and find in Him our truest identity, we are going to experience ourselves as strangers in a strange world. We are made like everyone else and experience internal and external pressures to pursue what the world deems legitimate and of value. In the process, any thought of the future or the remembrance of God slips out of our minds. We become slaves not only to our bellies but to everything that we consume in an unthinking fashion. 

Abstemiousness and simplicity are not about lack but rather fullness. We must attend to the very real needs of the flesh but only as much as is required - and sometimes less. When we lose sight of God, our internal world is driven by anxiety and fear. We seek for security and to protect ourselves from want. What we find in the fathers, however, is not a starving of themselves, but rather the starving of the demons and what they nourish themselves upon. We engage in the ascetic life in order not to keep feeding the appetites and the passions that tie us to the world. 

This is no easy task. Rationalization and the illusion of joy and freedom keep us moving forward. However, these things (very much like rights and happiness) are very fragile. We think they are the norm but this is perhaps the great deception of our times. 

Our life has been given to us for repentance and we must not waste it. Life is a relationship; a constant turning towards God and who is constantly seeking us. Let us not grieve the Holy Spirit by seeking to quench our thirst for life and hunger for love other than in God.

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There is a beautiful movement created in the heart by St. John’s writing; it is almost a dance. We move back-and-forth with St. John by simultaneously reflecting upon the beauty of silence and stillness and the intimacy that we experience with God through it - while also being shown what the loss of the silence does to us.

The silence of which St. John speaks is not just the absence of noise, but rather the presence of a love and life that transcends our understanding. It can only be experienced. Therefore, St. John holds out before us the intimacy for which our our hearts long and that can be found in the silence while also warning us of the dangers and the pitfalls that allow this great gift to slip through our fingers.

The more we become attentive to the interior life, the more we realize how easily we can be distracted; how our thoughts and feelings can be manipulated either by our own appetites or by demonic provocation. It has been said that “Hurry destroys both poets and Saints“. The frenetic activity that surrounds us agitates and fragments the mind and the heart. To live in such a state for a long period of time dulls one’s sensibilities not only to the finer things of life but to God himself. 

Thus, the preliminary task John tell us is disengagement from all affairs, whether reasonable or senseless. Both can be equally distracting to us. In fact, it’s often easier for us to recognize the inane things to which we direct our attention then it is to see how the responsibilities and demands that we have set for ourselves places us on a never-ending treadmill of activity of mind and body. 

And so let us simplify our lives. It does not take long for us to realize the gains of doing so. We begin to taste, perhaps for the first time, the sweetness of those things that endure.

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In pursuing life in Christ, the experience of reality is often turned on its head. Our perception of the world around us and the interior world is shaped and formed by so many forces and influences. In a counterintuitive fashion, we have to move in opposing directions to the things that satisfy our ego or the desires of the flesh. 

Needless to say this can be disconcerting. We may see ourselves as understanding the faith or as having grown in certain virtues only to have it dispersed in an instant by the light of God’s truth. Whether it is something small or great, we can see how far we are from the stillness of mind and body of which Saint John speaks. Indeed, St. John tells us that many of these things the common run of men will find quite alien to themselves.

We are often cast about on the sea of our emotions or blown like a reed in the wind. We struggle with a certain aberration of mind; that is, we are ever so inconstant and changeable in the way that we live our lives. If one does not acknowledge this and struggle throughout the years to purify the heart, then to enter into the life of solitude and stillness can only lead to derangement. 

If what guides us is not the humble love and desire to give ourselves over completely to Christ then we are going to be fragmented internally by the most fierce passions. Anger will increase and even the memories of past wounds within the mind can fuel our resentment and drive us to the brink of madness. The person who enters into stillness well is completely unruffled by the chaos that exist in our world and becomes abstracted from the things that take hold of other peoples imagination as having great value. For the hesychast, however, there is only Christ!

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Only the most stalwart and patient of souls can follow along with this evening’s readings without being troubled. Once again it is repeated for us that our life is to be one of constant repentance; that is, turning toward God. Systematically the fathers break down every illusion that we might have about ourselves as having no need of such repentance. Even if we fulfill the work of the day, our response must be like the servants in the gospel: “we are unworthy and have only fulfilled what is our duty.” 

Our state of mind can only be that of gratitude for the gift of God’s mercy and grace. He has bestowed upon us an abundance of love despite the fact that we have often, as the scriptures tell us, treated him as “enemies”. Indeed our infidelity and the depths to which it reaches eludes are perception. 

Even our growth in virtue should instill within us a greater urgency for this repentance.  Growth shows previous inadequacy and negligence. We cannot be prideful or glorious about what we achieve; acknowledging that it is but a pale shadow of the love that God has bestowed upon us. 

Such an attitude also leads us to a deeper understanding of the need to embrace affliction. The gospel does not promise the security of this world or its comforts. In fact, just the opposite. To live for God, to embody the beatitudes is to find ourselves scorned and mocked by the world. The narrow way that leads to the kingdom passes inevitably through Calvary.

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What possibly could hesychasm or the life of hesychasts - those who live in perpetual stillness and prayer -  mean for those who living in the world; for all of those surrounded by a constant stream of noise and distraction?The answer is everything! Though few are called to this manner of life, all are destined to experience the fullness of its joy and sweetness in Christ in the kingdom. We have been made sons and daughters of God and the very Spirit of Love dwells within our hearts. 

What moves us to emulate the fathers in their discipline, to seek what they seek, must be the same desire. Our experience of Christ, our drawing close to him through prayer, the sacraments, and the scriptures must kindle within us an urgent longing for what He alone can provide. 

Those who love the things of the world do not see the pursuit of them as being extreme. Why is it when it comes to seeking the One who offers us perfect Life and Love that we become self-conscious; that we begin to worry about what others may think of us or how they might treat us? Why is this true even though Christ tells us that we should expect to be hated all by all because of His name? The Hesychast becomes the image of one who adds fire to fire. Having tasted the sweetness of Divine Love, he is willing to sell all to possess it. Gradually he becomes prayer and his life - a sacrifice of praise. In this he becomes like unto the angels.

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We picked up this evening with Hypothesis 13 on the subject of keeping Vigil and not giving oneself over to excessive sleep. However, as we immersed ourselves in the reading, we began to see the father guiding us into something much deeper.  The teaching on keeping vigil is a bridge to talking about Repentance. 

We were presented with the most beautiful understanding of the path the Christ guide us upon. There is a radical simplicity about it that is meant to cut through our tendency to turn the faith into something that is complex and impossible to understand. Repentance is not confined to particular times and deeds, but is put into practice to the extent that the commandments of Christ are fulfilled. The struggle for it is continuous until death. 

The kingdom of Heaven is at hand!  This is our path! It is the constant turning toward God that draws us forward, transforms us, and allows us to comprehend the things of the kingdom. This forsaking of self and sin is the oil of our lamps and each person will reveal who he is from this lamp. His own, not another’s!  It is filled and the light kindled by the practice of virtue. 

In fact, we are told that if we fail to live this and proclaim it to the world both in word and deed, we annul all that we do because we forget and do not take into account death. Our entire life is to be a striving to enter by the narrow gate, to walk the path of repentance - the dying to self and the rising to new life in Christ

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It’s hard to imagine ourselves as being nourished upon stillness and silence. Yet, this is exactly what the fathers and St. John Climacus seek to teach us. Stillness allows us to have an experiential knowledge of intimacy with God - an encounter with Mystery.  When we have shut the door to the senses, when we stilled our mouth from constant chatter and when we have shut the gate of the heart to demonic powers, it is then that we become prayer and gaze upon the Lord face-to-face. Our petitions, our needs and sorrows are written with love and zeal. 

We are to become an earthly image of an angel, whose prayer has not only been freed from sloth and negligence, but even from a kind of self-consciousness. The heart is ever ready for the Lord and His approach; and even if the body should sleep, the heart is awake and awaiting the beloved. 

Therefore, stillness is not only about being quiet, but rather it is a path to intimacy. The greater one’s love grows, the more passionate one becomes in their desire for God - everything on the periphery fades away and we see only our Lord.

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We picked up this evening with Hypothesis 12. The subtitle is on avoiding idle talk. However, this does not do justice to what we are given in the text. It is revealed to us how we are to kindle within our hearts the fire of love for God that then gives rise to a holy sacrifice of praise. 

Thus, the greatest thing that we can give God is to emulate the angels who praise Him without ceasing. Our love for the Lord should give rise to an urgent longing within the heart to call out to Him constantly and without distraction. 

Likewise, when we pray in common, we are to be attentive to the fact that we are responsible for the attentiveness of those around us and seek to preserve their focus. We do not pray or chant in an individualistic fashion but again imitate the angels in crying out to the Lord with one voice of love. 

What a blessing monks are for the church. The fathers tell us that Christ perfects the praise of infants; that is, he prefects the prayer of the monk in his innocence and childlike simplicity. It is through this humble prayer and sacrifice of praise that the demons are conquered. What makes this even more powerful is that it is often done hidden from the eyes of the world. Such prayer is offered without pride or self-consciousness. Rather it rises unimpeded to the very throne of God on behalf of all.

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St. John Climacus brings us now to discuss the fruits of the ascetic life. We picked up this evening with Step 27 on “stillness of mind and body”. John is very hesitant to approach such a subject. He does not want to distract the warrior from the task at hand; that is, those who are engaged in the spiritual warfare against the passions and the provocations of the evil one.  He only relents because he understands how important it is to see the goal of the spiritual life so that it might increase our desire for God and our detachment from the things of the world. 

Holy stillness emerges when the Nous, the eye of the heart, has become impenetrable and undistracted by the noise of the world. The disordered passions have now become a purified and single passion or desire for God. The love of and immersion in silence deepens because it is there that God speaks a Word that is equal to Himself. The language of Love, beyond words, begins to well up from within - united to the Spirit that cries out with groans that are beyond our understanding. 

St. John acknowledges that many will not perceive or grasp the holy violence of the Hesychast; that is, the radical turning away from the things of the world in order to turn completely toward God. This turning toward God, however, does not limit our vision or comprehension as those who are worldly often believe. Rather, it opens us up to an experience of infinite mystery of God himself; everlasting Life and Love.

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As we conclude Hypothesis 11, we are given very solid food to nourish our understanding of the nature of prayer and our demeanor. How is it that we are called to worship God, to pray the psalms, and what is our demeanor to be following that worship? 

A kind of liturgical asceticism must guide and direct our prayer and piety. Even the way that we pray and celebrate the liturgy, and one might say especially here, must allow the grace of God to guide and direct us. As always, Christ is the standard and the model. It is his humility, silence, obedience to God that must form and shape the way that we approach the altar and the manner in which we listen to the word of God. 

We must pray in a manner fosters patience and that allows us to listen with the spirit of contrition. We gather before God not to alter our emotional state or to create an experience that simply elevates the mind. We come before God to offer him a sacrifice of praise and that sacrifice is the fullness of our self. We are to be completely given over to him in such way that we withhold nothing from Him and are capable of receiving everything He desires to give us. 

Very few in our day think of worship in this fashion. May God give us the grace to offer him all that we have and are; for in seeking what He desires, God bestows upon us more than the mind in the heart can imagine.

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We come to the end of Step 26 on Discernment and in doing so we begin to see, or at least get a glimpse of, its importance for the spiritual life. So often sin distorts are perception of reality. It prevents us from seeing with clarity both the dignity and the blessings that come from being a son or daughter of God, baptized into Christ - as well as preventing us from seeing the darkness of sin. 

Christ tells us in the gospel that when the eye has been darkened completely, how great is the darkness! When the eye of the heart, the eye of the soul is darkened by sin then all that we see is the world before us in its most basic form. We see it as an object of consumption or we covet the things that we do not possess. 

In this we can become more like beasts who walk on all fours with their eyes cast down to the earth. It is discernment that allows us to see the glory of God in Christ Jesus. In the end, discernment gives rise to the acquisition of love - that is to say, the perfect dwelling of God.

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All that we do is to be touched by the grace of God, shaped by it, and perfected by it. This includes our virtues, and also the manner in which we pray. 

Psalmody has always been apart of the prayer tradition of the church and in particular of the monastics. The psalms capture within them both the adversities and the joys that we experience in this world. It is the most important thing that we can do as human beings; to seek to God and offer a sacrifice of praise. 

Therefore, the monks are very careful to allow their prayer to be guided by God. We can be willful even in the fashion that we pray and sing. This is also true in the times that we set for prayer for ourselves. For example, the monks prayed many times a day together; emphasizing that they are part of the body of Christ. We do not pray as individuals, but always aware of the radical communion that exists not only with God but with one another. 

Thus, we find among the fathers an emphasis upon praying and singing while remaining conscious of what is going on within their hearts. We do not want to fall into distraction or lead others into it. Simplicity and humility should be the mark of worship; that which guides us in order that what we sing and pray is reflective of the reality within our hearts and our desire for God. Once again, we are presented with a kind of liturgical asceticism. Liturgy shapes the interior life and the interior life shapes the way that we pray.

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Every week it is as if we are diving into living waters that renew and refresh the soul. This is particularly true of step 26 on Discernment and St. John’s summary towards its conclusion. So often as is true with the Fathers, St. John makes use of concrete and colorful imagery to capture for us the nature of the spiritual life and in this case discernment. 

What one gathers in so many of the teachings is that Faith involves seeing; a pulling back of the veil that allows us to see with perfect clarity the love and the mercy of God. St. John describes the many things that hobble us in that regard: Avarice, pride, attachment to our appetites and desire for the things of this world. It also describes the things that sharpen that vision and open us up to receive the gift of faith. Our pursuit of the virtues, and of the truth in our life lays the foundation to receive the greater gift of eternal Truth. This kind of seeing is not passive but rather involves the whole self. The deepest part of ourselves, the Nous, must be purified by Grace and asceticism so no impediment prevents us from moving toward God. The Nous becomes the “helmsman” then to lead us through the rough waters of this world.

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The focus of the Evergetinos this evening was on praying the psalms. However, as always with the writings of the fathers, the focus isn’t simply on the external actions, but the meaning of them. How do we pray as members of the body of Christ? Is there a kind of liturgical asceticism that must match our bodily asceticism?  What is the measure of our prayer? In other words, as those who live in a spirit of repentance and seek purity of heart, how do these realities shape the way we pray. 

The fathers this understood very well our tendency to focus on externals and that we can fall back into a modern day Pharisaism. We can be satisfied with the appearance of religiosity while giving scant attention to what God has revealed to us and the life that he has called us to embrace. Whenever this happens, it not only weakens our capacity to bear witness to Christ but it can undermine the life of the Church as a whole. If our hearts are fragmented by our sin this will manifest itself or be mirrored in liturgy. And when this takes place the entire culture around us - as well as within the church - can collapse. 

It’s a sobering presentation, but something that afflicts the Church in every generation. If the Evil One is going to attack the Church, he is going to attack it at its heart; that is, how we pray.

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As St. John draws us forward with these simple sayings about discernment and its fruit, we begin to see the immeasurable beauty of the ascetic life and the action of God’s grace. The life that God calls us to is not one of frenetic activity but rather the cultivation of purity of heart and humility in order that He might act within us. We do not seek simply freedom from sin but rather the life of the kingdom. It is the love, the virtue, the goodness of Christ that transforms the world. It is our entrance into the Paschal Mystery, the dying and rising of the spiritual life (with and in Christ), that makes the love of the kingdom present to the world. 

The life of the hesychasts, the ascetics who set all aside for Christ, is at the very heart of the church. When we lose sight of their love and desire for God, the church grows cold.  It is in the spirituality of the desert that the church will find renewal; when the minds and the hearts of men and women are open to the beauty of the life that God has called us to by His Grace.

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We continued with St. John’s summary of discernment and its particular fruit in the spiritual life. However, it does not read like a summary. Each saying opens us up to a divine reality and a participation in the life of Christ that comes to us by grace and the ascetic life. One cannot help but be captivated by the beauty of what St. John describes. It becomes evident that what we are being drawn into is the very beauty of Christ and that of the kingdom. Grace has the capacity to transform even the darkest of things within us and to illuminate the mind and the heart to see clearly what has eternal value. With the reading of each saying one begins to experience a holy desire growing within the heart. Thanks be to God!

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As we come toward the end of Step 26 on Discernment, St. John begins to offer us a summary of all that we have considered in the previous pages. In doing this, he alters his typical way of writing. One may speculate that he does this because of the importance of the virtue of discernment; both in fostering it and in protecting it.  Using brief sayings, very much like those found in the Philokalia, St. John begins to lay out for us the path to perfecting this virtue as well as to speak of the fruits of it in our lives. 

Our capacity to see spiritual realities in an unimpeded fashion allows us to be attentive to all of the vices as well as the remedies that the fathers set before us for overcoming them. In summarizing the step in this fashion, St. John presents us with the truth very much in the way that we receive it from the gospel. It overturns the worldly way of viewing things. It allows us to experience the discomfort of having our sensibilities challenged in regards to our patterns of thought and our most basic desires. It compels us to ask ourselves, “For whom  do I live? Who do I love above all things?”

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Breaking the night for prayer!!  The very idea either never comes into the mind of modern Christians or it sends a shudder through the heart. The idea of limiting something like sleep for the sake of prayer, of humbling the mind and body in such a way on purpose and regularly seems to express a type of insanity. Would I not make myself sick or incapable of working the next day if such a practice were embraced in modern times.

Yet, it is a constant practice throughout the spiritual tradition; to sanctify time and foster an urgent longing within the heart for God that causes the soul to rise, even in the night, to seek him. Admittedly, this may require that we simplify our lives. There is already a frenetic pace in our day-to-day lives; a busyness that is almost suffocating. Such makes the idea of adding night prayer to that seem impossible and even frightening.

One can only come to know the fruit of this through experience. In the stillness of the night, impediments that often plague us throughout the course of the day fall away. Creation itself grows quiet and with it the human heart. Such a heart filled with urgent longing for the Lord will rise eagerly and with joy to taste the sweetness of his presence!

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With each passing week, as we read St. John’s thoughts on discernment, we begin to see how it touches every aspect of our life. So often we confuse this gift with intellectually analyzing the circumstances around us or internal experiences and feelings or our perception of others’ actions. 

Yet discernment is not rooted in our private judgment. Rather, it arises out of union and communion with He who is Truth and Love. We engage in the ascetic life and seek purity of heart in order that we comprehend the truth unimpeded, to see things as God sees them and to see and respond to what he wants us to perceive.

Anything less than this leaves us completely vulnerable. St. John says, “let us watch and see which demon uplift us, which cast us down, which harden, which comfort, which darken, which pretend to communicate enlightenment to us, which make us slothful, which make us cunning, which make us sad, and which cheerful.”  It is only in Christ that we have the capacity to see these things. Strength and virtue of any kind comes not from climbing up a ladder of virtue on our own, but rather having Christ live within us. His virtue must become our virtue and his strength must becomes our strength. This is a difficult thing because it means letting go completely of the illusion that we can see the truth of the spiritual realities outside of our relationship with Him. It means being humble.

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The fathers continue to speak to us about service and work and the disposition that we are to have in doing it. Our understanding must move from a functional understanding of labor; engaging in it in a way that is determined by private judgment or by the desire for worldly things. 

Everything that we do must be tied to our service of the providence of God. In other words, we are responding to the call of Love. The way that the Christian works and responds to the needs of others (as well as the one’s own needs) is tied to our relationship with the Lord. We are given the task of being the guardian of souls; our own and others’. We are to attend to our own needs, trusting that God will provide us with what is needed. We are to serve others without making excuses for our avoidance or negligence in doing so. 

We are to seek first the kingdom of heaven. This is what shapes everything for us. We always return to the nest of prayer, there to be nourished upon the love and the grace of God. And it is only from that nest that we step out in response to His call to love and serve others. 

So often we fill our life with needless tasks; more often than not to give us a sense of security and safety. Yet to do so draws us away from He who is the Lord of love and the Governor of history; the One who provides for every one of our needs.

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Discernment, St. John tells us, arises out of humility. It also allows us to see the value of humility in the spiritual life. It is the virtue above all virtues, that we must cling to in the spiritual battle. The enemy will seek to confuse us in one way or another; by flattery or by seemingly knowing our thoughts and placing ideas before us which then make us fear their control over us. However, discernment and humility, both protect our capacity to live in He who is the truth. 

It also allows us to see the truth about ourselves as human beings and our dignity. We are not created with the passions. They rise out of our sin and the distortion of the desire that God has placed in us naturally. It is desire that makes us long for him and the life of virtue and it is anger that allows us to fight the good fight of faith and strike down the evil one and the temptations that are placed before us.  

We also find, over the course of time, that discernment allows us to let go of our judgment and what gives us security in the spiritual life and to trust wholly in God. Therefore, when life seems to crumble around us and all seems to be wrapped in darkness, discernment allows us to step forward with trust in God and his love. While it keeps us from acting in rash way it also protects us from false prudence that hides cowardice and lack of courage. 

What we begin to see is that any struggle in the spiritual life to overcome the passions, any sacrifice that we make to follow the Lord, promises what is beyond imagination. Even to lose all in this world is to lose nothing if we have Christ.

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What a beautiful group! Beauty, however, is not only found in the things that are attractive or appeal to our sensibilities. What is beautiful is found in the truth – the truth that speaks to the depths of our hearts and our religiosity. Once again, the fathers speak to us and present to us the gospel in unvarnished fashion. 

What is the disposition that we are to have in our service of God and others? If we give ourselves over to task with obedience, then we can be assured that God will provide all the grace that is necessary. If we do these tasks poorly, if we make mistakes, these do not diminish the value of our work. What gives shape to the work is the love and the humility of Christ. 

There are so many things that rush to our minds as to why we cannot bear something or why we cannot do a certain work. However, the fathers show us that so often such things are excuses; that is, plausible lies. They are reasonable because they are rooted in the reality of our own weaknesses. They are lies because they do not take into account the grace and the mercy of God. So often when we take up a task we engage in the labor abstracted from Christ. However, if we simply offer that labor to Christ, if we take it up by his grace and for his glory, then it has more value than we could ever imagine.

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Discernment is so much more than our analyzing the realities and circumstances around us by the use of intellect and reason. These faculties, as wonderful as they are, have inherent limitations. They are not infinite, nor can they speak of God as he is in himself. 

What God begins to show us in the spiritual life is that the more that we enter his love and truth, the more we are drawn into a mystery that is beyond us. Faith is described by many of the Saints as a “dark obscure knowing”. It is God‘s light, his divine light, that pierces through the darkness, and reveals to us the beauty of his love. It reveals (draws back the veil) and shows us that this love is worth everything to pursue and attain. “Love never ends”, the scriptures tell us. Discernment opens the door to that reality and allows us to step towards the beloved who desires to give us all. Our destiny is to move from glory to glory in the never-ending love of God.

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We are drawn ever deeper into the subtle manifestations of Avarice and how the demons make use of this passion to draw us into other sins. Indeed, it is a fearsome vice. The evil one can convince us that our identity is dependent on our having a certain objects or money and the security that it seems to offer us. Once we have given ourselves over to this thought, it gradually oppresses the mind and heart of the individual. Our incapacity to discern the truth of avarice’s grip upon us, we lose the ability can see what has enduring value. 

Such oppression undermines our commitment to God, others, and the pursuit of the path of sanctification he has set us upon. Suddenly we can no longer see what is good about a godly life and fidelity. We begin to see the weaknesses of others and the failure of a community to reach the ideal. We become hyper-critical. This the Evil One uses psychologically to make our exit from our vocation more acceptable to the mind. He first makes us despise what we once loved. What we once entered into with zeal, we now turn away from with cowardice. 

When given over to avarice we find ourselves falling under the control of the demons who continue to torment us; making us more vulnerable to the darkness of other passions. In this particular vice, we see the truth that “sin is its own punishment”. The more we grasp for the things of this world, the more we descend into darkness and ingratitude.

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This evening we continued our discussion of discernment;
in particular, developing an awareness of the action of the demons and their attempts to lead us astray. However, John also seeks to make us aware of the fact that it is not only the demons that we have to be aware of but our human nature in its fallen state. We are often weak of will and changeable in our mind. We are filled with contradictions and will often choose that which offers nothing over the love and the mercy of God. We have within certain destructive tendencies that are beyond reason. St. John would not have us over analyze these things but be aware of them so to avoid them and turn more radically toward God when we see them arise within our hearts.

What is most striking in this section of the Ladder is that divine light shines through John‘s own words. The open up reality for us and we see on the horizon our dignity and destiny in Christ so brilliantly that one can only gasp. It creates within the heart an urgent longing to run to the Beloved. It reveals in a fraction of the moment the entire meaning of the ascetical life. It is not about self-perfection or endurance, but rather about Love. It is about acknowledging that what has been fashioned from clay has now been placed and seated upon the very throne of God. Joy!

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We take up this evening a new hypothesis (VI) dealing with the ownership of property. At the heart of it, however, is the temptation to avarice and the impact that it has upon the spiritual life and upon our commitments to God and others. 

The monks relinquishment of property, their embrace of a life of poverty and simplicity, highlights for us the subtle temptations that are involved in our attachment to the things of the world. Where lust and gluttony perhaps fail to satisfy - avarice often step in to test us. It can become something insatiable. The more we amass the more we desire. 

Our attachment to things can begin on a very small level. Yet unchecked, it can affect the way that we enter into our relationship with God. We slowly begin to seek our security and identity in things. This, in turn, can make us ever so vulnerable to the demons attack against our commitments. The possession of things can make it seem more plausible to change and alter our life; to pursue another path of salvation, for ourselves, that does not require hardship or that offers more satisfaction. It gives room for our internal instability to drive us away from what challenges us internally to overcome the ego. What begins with a small attachment eventually can develop to the point where a demon tells us that “if stay where we are we the place our salvation in jeopardy. It is better to take what we have, and to create something better in our own judgment.”  In this, we often place our own judgment above God’s. It creates an atmosphere of infidelity and strips us of long-suffering.

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As we read St. John Climacus, we begin to see discernment as rooted in our relationship with God; a relationship that is founded upon the revelation of God‘s love and the desire that it stirs within the human heart to respond in kind. If we love God, then it is not going to seem to be a burden to us to take every thought captive and bring it before God for his blessing or judgment. Nor is waiting upon the Lord going to be a point of frustration. 

Rather, when we love God, we understand that he is going to desire what is best for us. This desire leads him to test our intentions so as to purify them. What God looks for is humility and a spirit of repentance. Faced with our own weakness, and the darkness that sin brings into our life and into the world, we must cling to God and allow him to guide us with his light.  Often only one step ahead is illuminated for us. We must be at peace with this if we have faith in him and trust in his love. 

Part of what this requires from us is an honest heart; one that avoids distractions and holds fast to innocence. Often our sensibilities can become hardened through our experience of the world, and we lose the capacity not only to be vulnerable to others but to God himself. It has been said that “haste destroys the poet and the saint”.  In the face of the frenetic pace of the world, let us hold on to simplicity and silence in order that we might hear the Beloved when he speaks to us.

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In St. John’s discussion of discernment, he reveals to us the beauty of a human being transformed by the grace of God and living in communion with Christ by removing every impediment within the heart and by constantly crying out to him in prayer. At the very center of this reality is the “eye of the soul”. It is extremely beautiful, St. John explains, and next to the angels it surpasses all things. The angels constantly gaze upon God and the purified eye of the soul, the nous, allows us to contemplate the beauty of God‘s love.

There is also a freedom that comes to the soul through this purification. Our capacity to discern spiritual realities enables us to engage in the warfare with the demons more diligently and to avoid the pitfalls that are set for us. Furthermore, it allows us to understand that there is no such thing as a small sin. If neglected, it can consume the entire person. Likewise, there is no part of our life that we are to take for granted. The eye of the soul allows us to see that each moment is an opportunity for us to respond to God and to others with love; an opportunity embraced or lost. Thus, it is a very high view of the human person that is set before us; a view that allows us to understand the radical communion that exists between each of us and to see our destiny in Christ. Beautiful indeed!

We continued our discussion from The Evergetinos on idleness. What begins to emerge from the wisdom of the fathers is that everything that is part of our life as human beings is filled with meaning and touched by grace. God has ordained that we provide for ourselves by the work of our hands. Furthermore, by this very same work, we are attentive to the needs of others. Work allows us to show charity to others in their needs. Avoiding idleness not only allows us to engage in fruitful labor but helps us to remain focused in our thoughts and avoid temptation. 

The fathers also understood that when our work is taken up as from the hand of God, as an act of obedient love, we give ourselves over to it with zeal and attention. We are prevented from falling into laziness. Such an understanding also allows us to engage in work in such a way that others see what motivates us. The intentions of the heart are often revealed in the simple way that we engage in our day-to-day labors. When we love, we take up that work diligently and joyfully.  We do not complain or fall into resentment. Nor do we compare our work with others. When we take up our work from God, it frees us from the pitfalls that often plague us on a daily basis. A balance emerges in our life. When our identity is rooted in God then we take up our labor from him and knowing that it is completed by his grace. Work is not what gives meaning to our life. It is love in our hearts that shapes that work.

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As we have discussed, the fruit of humility is discernment. But what is that? Is it simply private judgment, a human wisdom that has deepened over the course of the years? 

St. John gradually begins to reveal to us that it is a freedom that emerges from the removal of the impediments of our passions. A sole passion, the desire for God, begins to direct and guide our lives as well as reveal to us the truth about our actions and the realities around us. 

Yet, it is humility that must continue to guide and direct this gift of discernment. It is to see things as God sees them only because we are allowing ourselves to trust in His providence in the warp and woof of day-to-day life. Whether we are embattled or at peace, whether we are called to be obedient or to guide others, we must rely upon the grace of God. It is His love, the love of He who is the truth that allows us to comprehend the realities of this world and the world come. Thus, St. John shows us, we can never think of ourselves or the gifts that we experience abstracted from a deep intimacy with the Lord. It is only in Him and through Him that we can live the life to which he has called us and through Him that we who were blind can see!

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What a blessing it is to read slowly. It allows insights to unfold before our minds and imaginations that we often would not be attentive to due to our typical need to rush. Hurry, most often, comes from the evil one who seeks to undermine our peace. It is lingering over the thoughts of the fathers on idleness that we begin to understand that what they are talking about is not simply avoiding laziness and sloth. They are revealing to us that keeping our focus upon God in mind and body, that is with the whole self, we grow in our capacity to love God and others. 

Virtue forms within the soul from engaging in our tasks with love and humility. Our willingness to take up that which is simple and perhaps menial in the eyes of the world and to do so with love is what is seen by God. Pushing a broom, if done with love, draws us to the very heart of God. Whereas imbalance in our labor, whether it is driving ourselves harshly or laziness, makes us lose sight of the glory of God in all things. May we listen well as we sit at the feet of the fathers, so that we might live our lives and engage in our work with minds and hearts fixed on God.

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Where are we in the spiritual battle? Do we understand the virtues that are generally most necessary in the pursuit of virtue? So often in our day, we approach the spiritual life in a piecemeal fashion, gleaning from the writing of saints things that speak to our own particular sensibilities. But are any of these things going to help us address the dominant passions that we struggle with? 

We cannot be lazy in the labors of the spiritual life. We are blessed to be able to sit at the feet of the great elders and those who speak from experience. And yet, as with so many things in our day, we would have things come in our own time and in the way that we desire. Christianity overturns our perception of reality. What it means to love, what is truth, all comes into view only through the person of Christ. The shape of the Christian life is cruciform – always involving a dying to self and sin, and rising to new life in Christ. We must cast off the old man in order to put on the mind of Christ. Lacking discernment we may find ourselves being guided by the demons and settling into mediocrity or the embrace of selfishness and sin that merely is an aping of virtue.

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We turn now in the Evergetinos to consider the “avoidance of idleness”. With this, of course, we are compelled to consider the nature of work, and its connection to the spiritual life and our sanctification. 

Avoiding idleness is not simply keeping busy - much less busyness. It is something that allows us to prevent the mind and the heart from wandering from He who is the source of life, God. We are not angels.  We are called to provide for ourselves and also to provide for the poor. And so it is by the labor of our hands that we not only keep ourselves from becoming distracted - but enable ourselves not to become a burden to others and also to offer charity to those in need. 

Furthermore, keeping oneself from idleness also allows for the formation of virtues; obedience, self-control, ordering of the appetites, humility, etc. What is being presented to us, then, is connected to the overall portrait of what it is to be a human being; one whose life is directed completely toward God. The love that we have received and bear within us transforms everything about what it is to be a human being; to suffer, to love, and to work. It is our identity as Christians that must shape our perception of reality.

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Extraordinary and beautiful! We are currently reading Step 26 from The Ladder on discernment. As St. John begins to unpack things for us, that is, what discernment allows us to perceive about our intentions, our dispositions, how virtue and vice often get mixed together, why prayers sometimes go unanswered, and why demons often will cease their attack for a period of time - - St John also shows us the beauty and the mystery of the human person in relationship to God and as created by God. 

God‘s loving care for us, when seen with the clarity of the fathers’ wisdom and experience is enough to make one weep for joy. And this joy fosters a desire for God that, if inflamed, can not only purify us of the passions but transform us in such a fashion that we are drawn into the life of the very Holy Trinity. May God grant us this desire!

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After listening to a multitude of stories from the Evergetinos about responding to insults from others, the only response that one seems to be able to offer is a sigh; not a sigh expressing disbelief but rather wonder. This is the love and the grace that God offers to us at every single moment of our life. A synergy exists between our will (as simple as uttering a “yes” within our hearts to God), and the outpouring of His grace and compassion. Suddenly the unthinkable comes into view through our faith. We see, through experience, the Godly love that is not only offered to us but within us. 

One of the things that we often say to ourselves when we sin or when we respond to another who is wounded us is: “I’m only human!”  However, these are not just fanciful stories in the Evergetinos but rather signs of what God is capable of doing within the human heart and what he has made us by his grace. Through humbling ourselves, acknowledging the poverty of our sin, we are lifted up to love and show compassion to others as we have received from the Lord. 

The Desert Fathers are living icons of the gospel. They reveal to us this love, not primarily through their writings but rather through their lives. We in turn come to understand this not through reading but rather through experience. May God in his mercy draw us into his love and allow us to see him face-to-face!

When reading The Ladder of Divine Ascent, we begin to see that discernment is quite different from what we imagine. It is not simply the use of our reason and judgment to look at the realities around us, to dissect them, and so understand them. Discernment, as described by the fathers, is rooted in the virtue of humility. It is only when we live in He who is Truth that we come to understand the truth about ourselves, the world, and the kingdom. 

St. John in particular gives us a multiple examples of how discernment reveals to us the specific qualities of vices, how they manifest themselves and how they are to be remedied. It is curious that we often use our intellectual abilities to avoid reality or to create a certain perception of reality in our minds. It is only humility that allows us to be vulnerable; to expose the deepest part of ourselves to the light of truth. It is this vulnerability and our trust in God and his love that allows us not only to see the truth but to experience the light of it as a healing balm.

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Humility and selfless-love often bears no resemblance to what we hold in our minds as their meaning. It is only seeing these things through the grace that God gives us and what has been revealed to us in Christ that we begin to understand that Christ took upon himself all that is human and its burden. He is Humility. He entered into the depths of our hell and the hell of our sin not only the free us from death, but that we might not experience these things in isolation. In the darkest things of this world there is always the presence of He who is light. When this world offers us no consolation, it is Christ who embraces us. 

Humility, then, becomes our willingness to let go of the self and the self-image that we have created in our own minds and that has been distorted by our sin. It means to live in the truth of Christ who is self-emptying love. This will forever be a stumbling block in this world and to the human mind. Only faith can allow us to see the presence of Christ in our midst. Furthermore, it is only this selfless love of Christ within us the can bring healing and hope to others. When faith is reduced to an ideology or philosophy it becomes impotent. We must be willing to go, as it were, where angels fear to tread. We must be willing to enter into the depths of the sorrow of the world. Yet . . . we cannot do this so long as we cling to some worldly image of ourselves or perfection. We must die to self and sin and live fully to Christ. The cure for the human condition is and ever shall be crucified and humble love.

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Sometimes we are unaware of the treasure that we possess in and through the gift of faith; and also in the living witness and writing of the Saints. As St. John speaks of discernment this treasure is magnified for us and we begin to see how precious their teachings are and the life that God has called us to embrace. Our ability to see the preciousness of these gifts allows us to enter into the life with heartfelt perception. We cannot live with one foot in the world and one foot in the kingdom. Our minds and our hearts must belong to God and we must seek Him above all things.

In great detail, St. John begins to speak to us about the gift of discernment. It is especially important and valuable for  those who have the care of souls. To be a skilled physician one must have the experience necessary to apply the appropriate medicine and that which will be healing. It is also for this reason that monastic life has been so important for the life of the church. “Angels are a light for monks, and the monastic life is a light for all men.”  They show us how important it is to learn divine truth by toil and sweat. We must give our hearts over to the ascetic life and not squander the treasure. 

How quickly one begins to see that we would be wandering blindly without the guidance of the spiritual fathers. Let show our gratitude by our imitation of their zeal.

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Where is true freedom to be found? How do we recognize it within the human person? The fathers of The Evergetinos reveal it to us in a powerful fashion by speaking to us once again about humility and the manner in which we respond both to insults and to praise. 

Freedom comes from clearly seeing where true dignity and identity is found in ourselves and in others. We evaluate ourselves and others often by accidental qualities and external behaviors. As Christians, however, faith is meant to illuminate what we have become in Christ. We are called to something far greater than natural virtue. Grace builds on nature. Even the greatest kindness we could show another person or forbearance in the face of slight or insult is hardly recognizable and comparison to what our response must be in Christ. 

With the incarnation life has forever changed as well as our understanding of love and mercy. We cannot allow ourselves the too easy freedom of loving or hating others merely because of what they do or say to us. The only way that we are allowed to respond to another is to love them. 

This cannot be an abstract notion for us. We should believe it so deeply, embody it so fully, that “Contrarily, as though they entailed fearful death, the destruction of your soul, and eternal damnation, completely turn away from and despise all love of power and glory, and the desire for the various laudations of men“. I don’t think there is a stronger way of stating this!

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A glimmer of light begins to shine through the writing of St. John in regards to the perfection of virtue. John starts by putting before us list of those things that we should focus upon as beginners in the spiritual life or those who have reached an intermediate level. He also puts before us the resolution of those who are advanced; that is, the virtues that one possesses at this level and that they must protect. John is trying to paint with broad strokes the image of life in Christ. As one begins to share in that reality more deeply Christ image begins to manifest itself and we become imitators of Him.

As John unpacks for us the nature of discernment he shows us the things that it allows us to perceive. One of the valuable teachings he offers us is our responsiveness to the grace of God in times of illness. In our infirmity the demons will seek to afflict us on spiritual level.  Yet John also shows us that our minds and hearts can be purified at such times and that Christ can cleanse “clay by clay”. In the severity of our illness we can be delivered from certain passions.

These last steps of the Ladder of Divine Ascent must be read closely and slowly. It is solid food upon which we are being fed and a deep wisdom that is being set before us. Glory to God!

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If reading the gospel or reading the Fathers speak to us about walking the path of humility does not turn our life upside down, does not agitate the mind and the heart; and indeed, at times bring us to the place of atheism or the edge of sanity, then it is hard to imagine that it is Christianity that we are considering. We’ve grown so used to a evaluating what it is to be a human being and to live one’s life, the nature of self-esteem and self image, outside the context of the gospel that there is no longer anything recognizable as Christian.  Can we even answer the question, “What does it mean to be a Christian?“ Does the anthropology, psychology and spirituality of the desert Fathers find any place within our hearts or our vision of our life in this world? 

We see the Fathers willing to go to the depths of earthly hell in their pursuit of humility in order to be raised up to the heights of heaven. They came to understand that when one reaches for heaven by pride, one falls into the depths of Hell. This was not notional for them but real. Is our faith more than an idea? One of the reasons the fathers seem to so freely take this path of foolishness and absurdity is that they began to taste the freedom and the joy of the kingdom that comes through it. Where else do we find identity and dignity that cannot be taken away from us except with and in Christ?

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The fruit of humility is the emergence of discernment. For beginners, it is a true knowledge of themselves. For intermediate souls, it is a spiritual sense that distinguishes what is truly good from what is of nature or opposed to it. For the perfect it is knowledge that one comes by through divine illumination. God illuminates the darkness within by his grace. 

St. John begins to define for us the nature of this gift. However, what follows is quite different from how we in modern times think of discernment. So often it does not rise above private judgment or the natural virtue of distinguishing between the nature of things in accord with our intellect. Yet, as mentioned, discernment is a divine gift for which one prepares to receive through the grace of God and the ascetic life. 

We must seek to remove every impediment to our having a well formed conscience. Furthermore, we must avoid the traps that the evil one sets for us to draw us back in darkness. We must continue toiling in this fashion until the very fire of God enters the sanctuary of the human heart and renders our proclivity for sin powerless and consumes every fever of lust and movement of passion within us. Knowing that the demons seek to extinguish this light, we must constantly press on in the struggle. We must not believe ourselves incapable of engaging in the spiritual battle but always trust in the action of God‘s grace. 

Once St. John defined discernment for us, he begins to lay out the path of education in the spiritual life that is needed. He warns us not to stop with the beginner’s lessons but rather to press on and strive to advance in our understanding. What we must come to value above all things is the science of sciences and the art of arts – that is the wisdom of the fathers. In comparison to our worldly formation, how deeply do we penetrate the treasure of their teachings?

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Tonight we concluded our reading of step 25 on humility. I have no other way to describe my experience of reading this step other than the fact that it makes something within the heart leap for joy. For over the past months, what we have been shown is that humility is not simply a virtue that one strives to attain but rather a kind of truthful living that acknowledges God as the source of all. 

Beyond that, however, we are shown that humility is part of the very essence of God that has been revealed to us through the incarnation.  God shows himself as Holy Humility.  In loving us, God comes down to us and takes our life, our identity, our burden upon himself. The sense of lack and incompleteness at the very heart of our lives is filled by the God who comes to us and gives himself to us. 

Humility is so often presented to us as a kind of self hatred; whereas, in reality, it allows us to see not simply our weakness and our sin but the love of God with perfect clarity. Above all, St. John tells, us we should strive for humility. It is the narrow way. One must acknowledge one’s smallness in order to receive and participate in the greatness of the love of the one who created us. What better means do we have to do so than the Feast of the Nativity - unto us and child is born!

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The stories of the humility of the Saints and monks described in The Evergetinos can be hard to stomach. But if we consume them with the spirit of faith and the desire for God, they will nourish us to everlasting life. 

All of them point us to Christ himself - the prototype and standard of all virtue. We are ever so fortunate. It is amazing when you slow down and hear the story, read out loud how impactful it can be. When we can let go of our own critical spirit, when we can suspend judgment and simply allow ourselves to listen with faith then often we come to understand something astounding. 

As is so often the case in The Evergetinos, we see that embodying the virtue of Christ, living the gospel concretely, has the capacity to work miracles, to raise the dead, and to give enliven faith within the hearts of others. May the gift of these stories take root in our hearts and produce fruit that is pleasing to God!

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It is impossible to capture in words the joy that sweeps over the heart when one comes to understand what St. John Climacus is revealing to us about the nature of humility. In this step, he strips away all of our limited, false, or distorted perceptions of humility and reveals it for what it is: a gift of God‘s own self. 

After reading Step 25 our understanding of humility is forever changed. We are shown that God reveals the nature of humility by revealing himself to us in his Son. “Humility is Christ’s spiritual doctrine,” St. John tells us.  “It is introduced into the inner chamber of the soul by those who are counted worthy of it. It cannot be defined by perceptible words.”  Rather, by the grace of God, the heart is purified of the passions and all impediments are removed to our receiving God’s gifts. One of the greatest of those gifts is humility. 

This virtue is a participation in the life of God. Whatever we might lose of honor or dignity in the world is nothing in comparison to the joy that Christ offers us through this virtue.  “He who humbles himself will be exalted”.  We may feel that we are falling into an abyss and losing our identity as we let go of our attachment to the things of this world. However, what we are falling into is actually the abyss of God‘s love. We are letting go of the false self in order that we might be immersed in He who is meaning, He who is truth, He who is reality! 

What joy should be ours, St. John tells us: “By this shall all men know that we are God’s disciples, not because the devils are subject to us, but because our names are written in the Heaven of Humility.”

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Once again, reading the fathers on humility is humbling. Gradually our eyes are opened to the nature and reality of virtue; not as human reason or understanding grasp, but as it has been revealed to us in Christ and through the gift of His Spirit. 

This stands forth most of all in thinking about humility among the virtues. It is not self hatred. It is not self contempt. It is living in He who is Truth. For this reason, both the Evergetinos and St. John Climacus describe humility as the “door to the kingdom” and to participation in the very glory of God. It is also for this reason that we discover that just as the proud feel satisfaction with honors so those who are humble of mind are especially thankful for the attacks and scorn which befall them in this world. 

Such things free us from illusion; not only the illusions we have about ourselves but also the illusions that others often form about us. To be thought of as virtuous and holy, when in reality one understands that all is Grace, can be the bitterest of things to swallow. To know oneself as loved with an everlasting love and having been shown the mercy of God makes the thought of evaluating oneself in any measure seem absurd.

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The language that St. John Climacus uses to describe humility and its qualities is striking. In fact, in some ways it becomes unsettling. Unsettling - - because we often approach humility in an abstract fashion; as thinking little of ourselves, acknowledging our poverty and our sin. 

What we discover in John’s writing is that humility is of the very essence of God and how God has revealed himself to us. To grow in this virtue is to find ourselves entering into the abyss of God‘s love. As we fall in our own estimation, we are in reality falling into the love and mercy of God. St. John describes humility as the “door to the kingdom”. It is the same way that Christ describes himself. “I am the door.“ Christ is humility and to be conformed to him, to enter into a union of love with him, is to pass into the very pasture of paradise. 

Thus, to enter into the monastic life or the Christian life through any other door is to make ourselves thieves and robbers of our own life. In other words, it is to seek to seize for ourselves what only comes to us as a gift from God. While we were still enemies of God, he took our flesh and its burden upon himself, he humbled himself and became obedient in order that we might share in the fullness of his life. As those so redeemed, what other path could we dare travel?

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In hypothesis 1 of book 2 of The Evergetinos, we continue to hear one story after another of the humility of the fathers. Again and again, what we find emphasized is the willingness to set aside the self and the ego. We cling so fiercely to a sense of self-esteem and religious identity that gives us a sense of value or elevates us in the view of others. However, as with so many of the virtues, we find the monks, loving humility; pursuing it precisely because of what it produces within the soul and the freedom that it brings. 

What it produces is not the perfection of virtue as we understand it. By letting go of the self, Christ lifts us up to share in his life and glory. Thus, we find repeated stories of monks trying to hide themselves and any recognition of their holiness by fleeing the company of men. Yet, so often they find themselves discovered because the very glory of God shines forth from their countenance. 

The opposite of vice is not virtue, but rather Christ living within us. We put on Christ. We are conformed to him by Grace. If the world is attracted to anything, it is to that reality. The monks understood this. The only thing they feared was being drawn away from the path of humble obedience.

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It is a curious thing to be humbled by hearing a saint speak about humility. Yet, this is what happens. In and of itself, it reveals to us how far the human heart can be from grasping not only the nature of the virtue but what God has revealed to us in his only begotten Son. 

The Incarnation manifests to us this virtue in its full glory. The word of God, through whom all things have been created, becomes an infant, (infans), that is, “wordless one”. God draws back the veil in order that we might see and comprehend for ourselves the depth of His love and also the life and virtue that we are to embrace as those made in his image and likeness. To embrace Holy Humility, the very life of God, means to let go of our attachment to the things of this world or good deeds accomplished by our own hands. We begin to comprehend with greater clarity and firmness that all is Grace. 

To acknowledge this is to die to self and sin; it is, as John describes it, “reposing securely in the casket of modesty”. The humble heart becomes impervious and unmovable to the demons. As a quality of the Divine, it is not something that we can gauge in its perfection. John, however, works to help us understand its distinguishing characteristics.  One is struck by the fact that the humility of beginners is as different and distinct from the humility of the perfect as yeast and flour are from bread.  Purified by the fire of God‘s love it is freed from all of pride. This is something only God can reveal to us. 

God reveals himself to us in and through the gift of faith. We cannot approach him or the truth that he reveals with a consumerists mentality or seek to dissect these realities as we do with so many things in this world.  It is His light that reveals the depths of the human heart and it is His Spirit of Truth that draws us in the very depths of God.

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We began this evening with page one of the second volume of The Evergetinos. In many ways, we pick up where we left off in the first volume with humility. However, we are given very explicit examples of those who are a model of the virtue. Perhaps it would be better said that they present us with an other-worldly manifestation of the virtue - the Holy Fool. 

Such individuals, so driven by the love for Christ, have set aside so completely self-esteem and reputation that their presence reveals the poverty,  inadequacy or complete lack of this holy virtue in others; especially those who deem themselves to be religious. 

To hear the stories of their lives almost knocks the wind out of the reader. The very presence of their sanctity brings down upon them the scorn and the abuse of others. They embody Christ’s teaching, “You will be hated by all because of my name.” They are hated because they embodied the humility of Christ, who counted reputation as nothing, emptied himself and became a servant, obedient unto death. 

It is hard to be in the presence of such individuals. Their hidden sanctity will still speak to the souls of those in their midst and provoke a reaction. The demons who guide and direct our thoughts will seek to make us mock and ridicule them and blind us to their true goodness. Thus, they provide us with a cautionary tale – that in our lesser moments we are capable of mocking the Lord in others, when we hold them in contempt. We are not so far from committing such unholy violence in our hearts, when we lose sight of the dignity of those around us.

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Elder Porphyrios wrote “whoever wants to be a Christian must first become a poet”.  I mention this because the truth of it plays out in St. John’s writing tonight on humility. One indeed must become a poet - one who has the capacity to capture the deepest of mysteries with a few words. 

However, what we see in St. John’s writings is that even this capacity fails us when we begin to speak about “Holy Humility” - our call to participate in the very life and virtue of God;  “Learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart.”We must become docile; that is, teachable in the most radical fashion. There must be a willingness on our part to let go of all conceit, prudence, and cunning. What is being spoken of is not simply a natural virtue, but a participation in the divine. It is that which can only be understood through experience. 

Such a path will always be challenging because it means letting go of our perception of reality, even religious reality. As God draws us into greater intimacy with himself, we are called to walk along the dark and obscure path of faith. This faith is a kind of knowing, but it is dark and obscure because it is beyond the limitations of intellect, reason, and imagination. To experience God “as he is in himself” means to let go of the boundaries, the foot holds, and the crutches that we have used to move forward in our understanding. It can be a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God: Fearful, precisely, because it means letting go of reality as we have known it. 

We can feel as though we are being brought to the edge of insanity and so St. John warns us that we must let go of prudence and its delusion. Prudence often masks a lack of courage. It is a human wisdom that tells us, warns us, not to go to extremes. In this sense, it is good. Yet, it can also be deadly to true faith. It can cripple us with fear and make us choose the path of safety, rather than entrusting ourselves wholly to God.

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Tonight we read the final hypotheses of the First Volume of the Evergetinos. From beginning to end the volume and its teachings are as challenging as they are beautiful. 

The focus this evening was on our attachment to the things of this world; whether those things be the praise of men or material objects and clothing. As always the fathers present us with the gospel in an unvarnished fashion. Their ability to touch upon the most subtle aspects of the passions and temptations is extraordinary. Even when we let go of material attachments we can cling to a kind of spiritual raiment. It takes a great deal of time and grace to break loose of the fetters that hold us; our desire for the pleasures of this world, both great and small. 

Even the monk can hold on to certain implements or clothing when there is no need for them other than the satisfaction that they offer in the possessing of them. Frugality and modesty in dress should be virtues that we love and cultivate. In a culture where there is an abundance of everything on demand. Our sharing in this has become habitual and it can be overwhelmingly difficult to overcome. What we see in the fathers is the constant reminder to adorn the soul. We are to store up treasure for ourselves in heaven.  It is  the poor that we have received that become our greatest advocates before the throne of God.

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Guile.  It is rarely a word that is used in our day; nor one which we use to examine our own minds and hearts. Yet, as St. John describes it, guile has an impact upon our vision of life, God, ourselves, and others. Our vision becomes wholly distorted and perverted. While guile is a kind of intelligence - it is sly and cunning. Understanding, then, is used to manipulate others and circumstances for one’s own benefit. This in turn creates an aversion to humility and repentance. The pretense of religion and religiosity begins to prevail in a person’s life. Reverence and piety becomes a sham.  One becomes diabolical, and they use what is good in order to commit evil. It creates within the human heart a love of sin and so makes an individual the companion of the devil. 

We are to live upright lives; that is, we are stand upright with our eyes fixed forward toward the life that God has made possible for us. How often we choose the path of beasts; our eyes directed downwards towards the things of this world and the satisfaction of our own appetites. The mind and the heart become sick and incapable of seeing the truth - so deeply have they sunk into the abyss of this unholy cunning.

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We are drawing close to the end of the first volume of the Evergetinos. We’ve come to the end of a long journey; but in reality it’s just the beginning for us. The fathers began by having us meditate long upon repentance. This is the starting point. The turning from the self toward God for healing. 

Now at the conclusion of the volume our eyes gaze  upon the vision of humility. Again, it is not the humility of this world, but the humility of God. It is the humility of a love that empties itself in order to lift others out of their poverty and darkness. It is the love that thinks nothing of the self but seeks only the fulfillment the will of the beloved. 

We were shown this evening and number of aspect of this humility. The first is self-reproach. He who seeks the honor of God and finds his identity rooted in God is going to seek nothing of the honor and privileges of this world. We are reminded that “all flesh is as grass and all the glory of man as the flower of grass”. Everything within this world passes away. Why do we cling to it so tenaciously, and yet hold so little desire for the love that searches us out constantly. “Heart speaks to heart.” We let go of everything, including our own ego, in order that nothing might impede our capacity to hear God’s Word of Love.

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To be simple, guileless, and meek are described by St. John as a habit of soul. Habits form deeply over the course of time and those that we form through negligence in our relationship with God are often very difficult to change. In fact, it would be better to say that they are changed only by the grace of God. 

What would our life look like if our speech was unpremeditated? What would our relationships look like if we were free from ulterior motives? To look upon others only with love and to live in the truth through humility is to reshape our experience and vision of reality. Suddenly we begin to see things (and more importantly others) as God sees them. We can look upon the other and be blind to their natural faults or defects as well as their sins. We return to a kind of holy innocence and purity of heart were we never lose sight of the beauty of God’s creation and most especially the beauty of the human person. To give oneself to God is to find within the capacity to give oneself to others, to love without measure, to serve without calculation. May God make it so!

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What a privilege it is to read the fathers! As we are being drawn by them into a deeper understanding of the virtue of humility, their vision of its beauty opens up before us. It is not something that only reveals the poverty of our sin and need for healing. Humility also reveals that we are made in the image and likeness of God. 

We should not see humility then from a negative perspective. It reveals also the highest truth about who we are as human beings. We are destined to share in the fullness of the life of God. Humility does begin by acknowledging the truth about ourselves and our need for healing. Over the course of time it is perfected by the struggles that we undergo and the great losses that we experience. Eventually, however, by the action of God’s grace it is brought to perfection and there exist within us no desire for sin and no lingering element of pride. We begin to see in that moment that humility is one of the qualities of our God. Suddenly our vision of the spiritual life changes. Everything is meant to draw us into the fullness of his life, virtue and love. Thanks be to God!

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A lecture presented at Duquesne University, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, on Tuesday, October 24, 2023. Sponsored by the Department of Catholic Studies. 

“We are reading to fast!”  This is typically something that we would never say about our study groups. However, as we sit at the feet of St. John Climacus, we come to the realization that we could sit with a single saying for months on end and not fail to be nourished. 

We concluded our discussion of Step 23 and the difficulty with blasphemous thoughts. The evil one in his envy will seek to distract us with blasphemous thoughts that come like a flash of lightning before the mind. Our one response should be to lay this great burden upon the Lord, to entrust it to him, knowing that it comes not from our hearts but from the malice of the evil one. 

In Step 24 Saint John begins to discuss meekness, simplicity, and guilelessness. As Saint John begins to define it for us, we suddenly experience ourselves as moving too briskly. Meekness is an “unchangeable state of mind, a rock overlooking the sea of anger”. These thoughts alone are enough to alter our view of this great virtue. In the face of the chaos of living in a fallen world or the experience of the hatred and anger of others, meekness becomes a buttress that is unshakable and keeps us from being swept away by touchiness of mind or irritability of heart. Meekness creates the desire for simplicity; to create a place where the Lord will find rest within us. It allows us to maintain dominion over our heart by the simple act of mortifying the intellect and private judgment. In the weeks to come, may we linger along with these thoughts and come to desire this great virtue.

Coming towards the end of the first volume of the Evergetinos, it is clear that we are being nourished upon solid food. During these many weeks, the fathers have been leading us into a deeper understanding of the virtue of humility. It is one thing to understand the definition of humility; even something as clear as “truthful living”. However, it is only in the illustrative stories that the fathers give us that we move from the realm of imagination, personal judgment and reason to see this virtue with the eyes of faith. What we are called to is the perfect humility of Christ; he who sought only to do the will of his heavenly father. Christ sacrifices himself for the sake of love. What we see in the stories is the subtlety with which we focus upon the ego even as we pursue things that are religious. We are presented in particular with a powerful story about Saint Anthony the Great. He is told that a cobbler in the city has reached a level of greater sanctity than he has despite his ascetic rigors. This cobbler saw himself as the least of all the people in the entire city and the most worthy of condemnation and judgment by God. He would tell himself this in the morning and at night. What is significant about this is that he does not compare himself with any other person in acknowledging this truth. Looking at God he can only see his need for mercy and for complete gratitude. Yet Anthony as great as he was and having sacrificed so much still had a question within his heart. Is there anyone out there who has attained a level of greater sanctity? At that moment, Anthony turns his gaze away from God in order to compare himself with others. He loses sight, if only for a moment, of God. To gaze only upon God and his love drives out every element of ego. There is only Christ!

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Pride destroys the one thing that the spiritual person should desire - the  unfailing light in the eye of the heart. The ascetic life seeks to remove every impediment to our loving God and being faithful to his will. The moment that we are filled with conceit or self-esteem, our souls, despite having the illusion of wealth, come to know the greatest poverty and darkness. What appears beautiful on the outside is often foul and rotting within. Saint John tells us that a “proud monk has no need of a devil, he has become a devil and enemy to himself.” And so for all of us: Pride undermines every virtue and makes us vulnerable to the most cruel of foes. One is exposed to blasphemous thoughts, even at the time of worship. If we are not constantly reproaching ourselves for our sin and acknowledging our poverty before God, then the enemy draws close and begins to play with the mind and the heart by placing suggestions before us. The presence of these thoughts can lead a person into great despair and make them want to give off of prayer and the participation in the holy mysteries. Therefore, John exhorts us to continue praying to the end and not give up the fight even when we feel overcome. Our prayer must become ever more constant until such thoughts cease.

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Is it possible for us to let go of our private judgment - to let ourselves be led by the Spirit of God into the Truth? As we read the teachings and the stories of the fathers on humility and how this virtue is embodied, the difficulty of letting go of our own perspective on virtue, and what it is must be abandoned. The virtue that we are called to is the virtue of Christ. Once again, we are not called simply to the perfection of natural virtue or what we can attain by human effort. It is by the grace of God alone that we can let go of self-esteem and ego. We will cling to these with fierceness despite having the truth set before our eyes; what we see on the Cross and receive in the Eucharist. We are unwilling to yield the things of this world for that which is eternal - for the pearl of great price.

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As we pour through the sayings of Saint John Climacus about pride and overcoming pride, what we see in the Evergetinos and its teaching on humility we see now in the Ladder’s teaching on pride. We are circling around something greater than just an idea. We circle around pride and look at its many facets in order to see how subtle the temptations often are to embrace the illusion that this vice puts before us. The devil will use every means to pull us away from the truth and truthful living. Therefore, Saint John wants us to see every manifestation of the pride in order that we also might apply the remedies that the fathers put before us.

What becomes clear is the need for constant vigilance. We must not allow ourselves to lose sight of God and his mercy and grace or our poverty and sin. Everything good comes to us from the hand of God, and there is nothing that we can attribute to ourselves that is enduring. Christ is truth and so we must strive throughout the course of our entire life to avoid all falsehood. We must not succumb to the father of lies and so find ourselves in his grip or being his plaything. May God be our strength and source of invincible peace.

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We were turn once again to the most important of virtues - humility. Despite the repeated sayings about humility and the many illustrative stories, one does not have a sense of the “same thing” being said over and over again. Rather, humility is like a precious gem. Through the writings and the sayings of the Fathers we revolve around it, allowing the light of Christ to illuminate every facet of this virtue. The Fathers want us to understand that even our virtue must be perfected by the grace of God. It is precisely this reality that we see manifest in the struggles of the Fathers to obtain it. It is so precious that one should be willing, as it were, to sell all to possess it. In this sense, humility is a willingness to let go of the self, the ego, in order that we might keep our minds and our hearts fixed upon Christ. It is by His grace alone that we are saved and it is by imitating His humility that the demons are overcome.

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“An arrogant man yearns for authority; he cannot, or rather, does not wish to perish utterly.“ In many ways, this one saying sums up our reflection this evening. When pride takes hold of an individual soul, one begins to move further and further away from God. Rather than “perish utterly” - that is, die to self and sin - one drives God from the mind and heart.

The capacity to love diminishes, the desire to humiliate others increases, and, finally, our perception of reality is distorted beyond measure. It is for this reason that Saint John entitles this step “On Mad Pride“.  The more that we turn away from He who is the Way, the Truth and the Life, the more that we turn away from He who is Meaning, the more we lose touch with reality. We become like the one who fell from heaven, the father of lies. We are drawn into the same darkness and inability to see not only the truth about our souls but also to see the depths of God’s love and compassion.

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Rarely do we acknowledge the extraordinary gift that God gave to his Church in the Desert fathers. It is precisely through their “living martyrdom” - their dying to self, to sin, and to the world, that they are able to guide us through the trials and tribulations of spiritual warfare. Their perception of our vulnerabilities as human beings was very acute. Humbled over and over again and acknowledging their sin and poverty before God, they came to see the many ways that the vices manifest themselves as well as the remedies to bring healing.

The spirituality that arises out of desert monasticism is not one among many. It is “the spirituality” of the church. It is a manifestation of the deepest exercise of faith. In this the desert fathers became living icons of the gospel. For this reason, it is often acknowledged that “wherever we see renewal within the life of the church, there are the desert fathers.” 

Saint John Climacus draws us into where the fiercest warfare takes place – the human ego. We often seek to place the self at the center of existence and so open ourselves up to the spirit of vainglory and pride. When these take hold of us they close the door to repentance and healing. Furthermore, St. John tells us, they lead to a kind of “madness”. They distort our perception of reality. We can no longer see God or the truth about ourselves. And we see others not as the object of our love and compassion. Rather we become pitiless inquisitors and inhuman judges. Thus, it has often been said that a prideful monk has no need to be attacked by the demons because he has become a demon himself. This is true for all of us.

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Synopsis of Tonight’s Group on The Evergetinos:

We often hear the question: “How would you describe the taste of honey to another who has never had it or the taste of a pear or its texture?” We might ask the very same questions about the virtues and in particular that of humility. How do we describe something that another has never tasted or that we have barely tasted ourselves? More importantly, how do we describe something that expresses not natural virtue, but the virtue of Christ himself - that describes the Divine life. 

What is so striking about the desert fathers’ writing is that it brings the gospel alive. It becomes impossible for us to make the words that we hear as flat as the page upon which they are written. Suddenly they become embodied in a rich and powerful way through the lives of the Saints. They beckon us, like Christ, to take hold of what endures, to thirst for the love and virtue that leads us to intimacy with God, and to experience the true joy of the kingdom.

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One of the prophets writes: “the human heart is a treacherous thing, who can endure it!“ We begin to see the truth of this statement or more accurately the truth that is behind it. The spiritual battle that we engage in with our passions and our thoughts is often dogged by a kind of diabolical intrigue. The devil is relentless and unresting. He can manipulate us in such a way that he makes us desire to put ourselves forward, to put ourselves into the light; convincing us that to do so will draw people to greater faith. 

The evil one acts with a kind of patience; he will begin to work on us slowly. He begins by making us enamored with our own natural gifts and abilities. In this way he makes us unfaithful in small things; we attribute natural gifts to ourselves rather than simply being grateful for the things of God has given to us. Such infidelity grows over the course of time as well as the complexity of the evil one’s manipulation. He can begin to work on us from multiple angles, if you will. He can place scripture in our mind to do battle with the temptation of one demon, but then make us feel proud of our ability to do so. 

Therefore, St. John tells us that we must begin the road to freedom from vainglory by remaining silent about ourselves and our accomplishments. We must learn to love to be dishonored. To be a Christian in this world is to be mocked and held in contempt. We must set aside our tendency to wear a mask that makes us more acceptable in the eyes of the world. We may put on the appearance of virtue yet always within the limits of what our world finds acceptable.

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Humility is above all the other virtues.” Living in the truth allows for the most important thing to emerge in a person’s life – repentance. When we see and acknowledge the nature of our actions and our thoughts and we bring them before God, it is then that He can heal us and make us whole. 

The struggle to do this, however, can be great. There’s always part of us that wants to hold on to the illusion of creating our own dignity and identity. Humility compels us to acknowledge that all things begin and end with God. We certainly have our role to play in the Divine drama; however, one can have all the virtues and appear to be saintly, yet if they are lacking the virtue of humility, none of these virtues will bear fruit. If an individual is like the publican coming to the temple beating his breast and realizing that there is no virtue in him at all immediately he is justified in the eyes of God. He’s let go of the lie of the Evil One. 

We cannot take for ourselves what belongs to God alone. He is life and love and truth, and it is his mercy that allows us to participate in this reality. To be humble, to see ourselves as nothing of note, cost very little but promises everything in return.

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Humility often eludes us not only in practice but in our ability to understand it. As always, we have to look to Christ as the standard. What we see revealed in him through the incarnation and in the Paschal mystery opens the door for us to begin to walk this same path. 

Understanding comes through experience. We must be shown what humility is and be made humble through experience. So often the self seeks to place itself at the center of existence; and in our spiritual life we begin to lose sight of God. Even in the pursuit of sanctity, we can fail to see the ways that we are lacking purity of heart. We often do not desire God above all things, or make him the beginning and end of all that we do. We may toil but to no end. 

Having said this, the stories from the fathers begin to reveal to us the distinctive marks of humility in a man. These stories show us why it is not only the most important virtue but also the most powerful. It overcomes all that is demonic. The more we trust solely in the grace of God, the more we abandon ourselves to his mercy and acknowledge the poverty due to our sin, the more his grace transforms us and acts through us and touches the lives of others. Humility and its perfection goes beyond truthful living or acknowledging the truth about ourselves. It is having eyes only for God. It is living in him and for him in every measure.

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With stunning clarity, St. John Climacus begins to show us the subtlety of vainglory; how easily it draws us to focus upon the self in one fashion or another. It suggests thoughts that elevate us in our own eyes and diminishes others in our judgment. 

Through vainglory we begin the movement of placing ourselves in the position of God; placing the self at the center of the spiritual life. The battle becomes ever so fierce and dangerous because at this point the focus of the demons’ attention is on our virtues. The demons make them the object of our attention. In doing so they turn us away from God who is the beginning and end of all things. 

And with the self firmly planted at the center, we are easily driven to rage and wrath towards anyone who gets in our way.  In the end, St John will show us how this gives birth to pride and how it draws us into the very darkness of hell itself.

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Every generation, every person, must be made humble!  Whatever way that takes place - whatever means we are shown this, it must happen if we are to follow Christ, and if we are to live in Him. He is Humility because he is Truth. In fact, the simplest definition of humility for us is truthful living. We must live in the Truth that has been revealed to us - we must live in Christ. 

That sounds a lot easier than what it is. Our egos often snap back into the center. The self, even within the context of the spiritual life, wants to be recognized as having value and strength. We want to have the perception of lifting ourselves up out of the mire. 

It is a humbling thing in and of itself to be saved. To acknowledge a savior means that we acknowledge the truth of our own poverty and sin. It means that we must acknowledge that we are not the source of life and love. God gives it to us so freely and with such gentleness and yet we can resent Him for it. Christ endures all things for us. He makes himself so small so as to be non-threatening; that is, he gives himself to us as our very food and drink. He nourishes us upon himself and his love. Yet pride can blind us to it all. God wants no “thing” from us. He wants us. Sadly, to say “yes” to that love can be one of the hardest things of life.

Self-esteem . . . how the meaning of that has changed over the generations. And when it becomes abstracted from our relationship with God, when our self-identity, purpose, and meaning becomes unmoored from He who created us, self-esteem can become the most grotesque of the vices. It will not only diminish our virtues, but destroy them completely. 

When the sweat and the toil of the spiritual life is turned back on the self or when ascetical practices become ends in themselves, they lose all value. Christ himself warns us about this in the Gospel. “If you fast in order that others see that you are fasting, then you have your reward.“ In other words, we have our payment in full. We see ourselves, and others see us as self-disciplined, but that is as far as the labor takes us. 
In this sense we become the most pitiable of all men, because we are acting as if there is no resurrection. If the things we do in this world, including religious things, are done for ourselves and to build up our own egos then they will eventually turn to dust. The love that has been revealed to us is self-emptying. 

In our day to hold fast to such an understanding can only seem absurd for in no way does it fit with the wisdom of the world. Only by keeping our eyes fixed upon God and fixed upon Jesus Christ and him crucified do we let go of the illusion not only of being the self-made man, but the self-made Christian. Religious people are not in capable of having their own delusions. In fact, the delusion of being religious can be the greatest among them and the most difficult to overcome. It is only when the cross is firmly rooted in the mind and the heart and when we have allowed ourselves to be humbled by it do we then become free; free, not for ourselves or to serve ourselves, but free to love others and God. 

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I can say this without any caveat - reading the Evergetinos is one of the most important things that we could do for ourselves in the spiritual life. I know that might sound extreme; especially given all of the writings of the Fathers that we have read over the course of the years, including the writings of the Philokalia. 

Yet, there’s something exceptional about the Evergetinos. We are not only given specific teachings but we are shown the lived experience of the fathers; how they came to understand things in the way that they did about the human person, the struggle with sin, and the action of God’s grace. This became especially apparent in this evening’s group. Our focus, in particular, was on the virtue of humility. After pondering the sayings of the Fathers - that the truly wise individual is the one who has control over his volition, who seeks in every way to make his will subject to God and understands that the will of God is advantageous to him in a manner surpassing all human understanding. 

In and of itself this is beautiful and speaks to the heart. However, we segued into a story from the life of Saint Pachomius describing the birth and development of humility in the soul of one of his monks Simvanos. Suddenly all the truths we read about came to life. We move from the notional to the real very quickly. The human mind and our tendency towards rationalization easily draws us back to a worldly way of perceiving reality. Whereas the lives of the Saints reveal to us the heart of man and God; what it is to be created in the image and likeness of God, what it is to neglect that truth, and the beauty of the soul that emerges when the grace of God brings healing where once there was only sin.

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Anxiety, it has been said, is ubiquitous. We all experience it and in its many manifestations. On a purely psychological level, one can never get to the heart or source of this feeling and its accompanying isolation. Often we find ourselves desperate to free ourselves from its grip. Therefore, we either immerse ourselves in the things of this world and maintain the illusion of security or we become paralyzed by it completely. 

The desert fathers including St. John Climacus, however, remind us that through the incarnation everything about what it is to be a human being has been assumed and embraced by our Lord, including this experience that often plagues our existence. Christ is the source of all healing and in and through our immersion in His life through the sacraments and prayer we begin to enter into the peace of the kingdom. We are commanded in the Scriptures not to have any anxiety at all. However, this is not simply a command but a promise of grace and strength. If we hold on to our faith in the Lord, if we truly hope in his promises, then all anxiety and fear will flee.  To call upon the name of Jesus is to flog our enemies; meaning not only the temptations that come to us from the demons, but the fears that they would insert into our minds and hearts. 

To mourn over one’s sin, to acknowledge the brevity of our life, is the set aside all illusion and false security. It leads us to cling to Christ who is life and love. So often we too like the disciples are foolish and slow of heart to believe. Yet in Christ even the most improbable of things becomes possible - that in the soul dedicated to God fear and cowardice disappears.

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One of the most difficult things about the faith is not simply desiring God with all of our heart, but allowing God and His desire for us to transform us and shape us. It means allowing Him to draw us into His own life and virtue. We are to become in the world what He is to us. 

Therefore, we are immediately confronted with the fact that we have to let go of the limited powers of our own reason and judgment. We must place our faith and hope in the providence of God to guide us along the path that leads to salvation. Like Saint Peter there often comes a time in our life when another binds us and leads us where we do not want to go. There will likely be many occasions when we are called to die to self and sin and to live for God alone  - come what may.! 

The afflictions that we bear and our desire NOT to force our will upon others can only emerge from this reality. We must put on the mind of Christ. We must become what we receive in the holy Eucharist. All that we suffer must be seen as united to Christ’s redemptive work on the cross. Christianity is about as far from being a philosophical system or ideology as something could be. It is Divine Life and Love.

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All that was to be redeemed had also then to be assumed in the Incarnation. All that is human and all that is part of the human experience must be embraced by Christ in order that it might be healed by his grace. 

We are shown this in a very simple way in regards to one of our basic appetites as human beings - sleep. Like any other appetite, it must be ordered rightly; otherwise, it can end up stealing half of our life. Rather than being drawn into the rest of contemplation, we are often pulled into something much less helpful. Instead of engaging He who is Reality, Life and Love, we often seek to escape these things and enter into sleep or the myriad of ways that we can escape reality. 

Therefore, when it comes to prayer, we are often embattled. Sleep can come upon us quickly or we can be drawn to direct or attention to the work of our hands. The Evil One can stimulate the mind at just the right time to pull us away from the comfort and consolation of God into conversation, food, sleep, etc. We must understand that we are engaged in a spiritual battle. When the devil sees us engaging in spiritual warfare, when he sees us developing the discipline of prayer, he will immediately seek to afflicted us with temptations and fantasies the moment the prayer is finished. He will try to snatch away from us the first fruits of the soul. 

We can understand, then, why John tells us that bodily vigil leads to spiritual vigil or alertness. We need to be alert not to protect ourselves from the things of this world, but from the darkness that would enter into our hearts if we do not guard them.

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Being thrown off balance! The experience of vertigo! This is what comes to mind when considering the writings from the Evergetinos this evening. Once again, the gospel is put before us in an unvarnished fashion. It is as if through the unclouded vision of the fathers suddenly the truth of the gospel appears before us and all of its starkness. We are to love and to become love. It is this reality that must shape and form our interaction with every person we encounter. It suggests a kind of vulnerability where we seemingly leave ourselves exposed to the world around us and its malice. So easily does the Evil One whisper in our ears, “If you give yourself in such a way, you will undoubtedly find yourself impoverished.” “Would God really ask such a thing from you?”  Such thinking makes us very calculating about our lives. We are comfortable with boundaries and sometimes the religious boundaries, the walls that we put up around ourselves in the name of God are the highest and thickest of them all. 

Yet, we always have before us Christ crucified - arms outstretched and hanging naked upon the cross. He is mocked in the same way that our own hearts mock the truth when we shrink away from its demands in horror. To “think” about unconditional love always allows us to remain one step removed. If we keep the faith notional, we do not have to live it. The fathers, however, allow us no such luxury. Nor did they have confidence in their own virtue or rectitude. Humility understands one thing – all is Grace. This will forever compel us to look upon others with the generosity of God and ourselves as the recipients of incalculable and unmerited mercy.

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The healing of the soul! So often we lose sight of the meaning of the spiritual life and the disciplines that we embrace. We often look at them as being punitive or requiring us to give up something that we enjoy or take pleasure in. We can lose sight very quickly of the presence of God even in the practice of prayer. 

This came forward when we discussed this evening something such as vigils. Rarely is the practice of vigil (breaking one’s sleep to rise and pray at night) ever discussed as a valuable exercise for those not only living in a monastery. To order our appetite for sleep and to break the night for prayer is seen as nonsensical or something that could jeopardize one’s health and well-being or one’s capacity to work. 

What we find in the spiritual tradition, however, is a far different vision. Bodily vigil leads to spiritual vigil; that is, spiritual vigilance or alertness. Arising during the quiet of the night, humbled in mind and body, one is able to enter into the deep silence of prayer and receive more freely what God desires to give us. Not experiencing the impediment of worldly distractions or the distractions of a multitude of thoughts we are able to open the mind and the heart to God fully. And in doing so we can also experience the deepest healing. 

We begin to lose the desire to escape from reality in the things of this world or in sleep. The opening of the mind and the heart to God through deep prayer can bring about the repairing even of the deepest trauma caused by our own sin or the sins of others. God can pass freely into the deepest recesses of the human heart that learns how to become vulnerable to Him over time through the experience of His love and compassion. Trust emerges and with it hope.

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If I were to give a title to this evening’s session, it would be “What is the place of the Christian in a post-Christian culture? Even better, “What is the place of the Christian in an age of nihilism? When we begin to consider our conduct in relationship to others, how we are to conform ourselves not simply to a law or teaching but to Christ himself, we are confronted with something quite radical. We are to meet insults, hatred, misunderstandings and aggression with humility.  Love is always meant to trump the other things that we hold on to with a firm grip; our own judgment, our own will, our own opinion and the satisfaction of our own desires above the needs of others. 

What we are presented with in the teachings of the fathers is rooted in the capacity of the soul for true discernment. The one who is pure of heart is able to see things as God sees them and so see their true value. Therefore, the fathers tell us that in this world we should take the place of a “stranger”; that is, not seeking to have the first word or seeking to have any desire at all except the desire for God and that which draws us toward Him. We are to bend like a reed in the wind when it comes to our relationships with other people. What value does our personal opinion have or the acceptance of some truth that we speak that is greater than love? To stand up against the winds is to court danger; it is to give rise to quarrels and cause trouble.

If we want to live with others, we are not to desire to give them orders, but like Christ we are to become an example of obedience. Even as we read the fathers, we must keep Christ before eyes for he is the standard. In the end, it was His actions that revealed a perfect obedience; an obedience rooted in love and willing to empty itself and take on the form of a servant. We are to strive for this alone – that our love would be cruciform.

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When we think of appetites or bodily desires, we rarely consider something such as sleep. Yet this evening St. John shows us that sleep is something that can disrupt that which is most important for the spiritual life; our prayer. Sleep is certainly an essential need that we have as human beings. However, there are many reasons that we can be drawn into it excessively. One of these is human nature of course. However, sleep can come upon us from an excess of food, from the temptation of demons, and also from extreme or prolonged fasting. Thus, sleeping is important for us to consider closely.  Excessive sleeping can become a long-standing habit that is difficult to cure. 

It may be difficult for us to think of demons having an impact upon us in this fashion. Yet, when the bell rings for prayer or when the alarm goes off in the morning we can hear a voice within our minds say “Wait, give yourself a little more rest.” In modern days the snooze alarm allows us to extend this indefinitely and we begin our days, perhaps lacking prayer altogether. We can also experience the sensation of severe and unusual pains in the stomach or fits of yawning or even waves of laughter over some amusing incident that comes to mind or takes place within the church. 

The same sluggishness in getting out of bed can follow us into the practice of prayer itself. We can hurry through our prayers; saying them inattentively and allowing the mind to wander. We can enter into church without the proper demeanor or making signs of devotion. When these patterns of behavior take over then the demons will certainly make sport of us. To combat this St. John encourages common prayer where we unite ourselves with others in this most essential practice of calling out to God. In this, we can call to mind Jesus’ own words, “Where two or three are gathered, there I am in their midst.“ 

Often in our day with the breakdown of Christian culture and community, those living in the world, sadly, find themselves left to pray on their own. However, we are not left to ourselves. Through the Hours or the Divine Office we were able to pray with one mind and heart with the Church throughout the world. A deep mystical Communion exist when we engage in the prayer of the Church. 

All this is meant to be a simple reminder to us about the subtle things that can distract us at the time of prayer. Therefore, St. John tells us that the practice of prayer itself purifies our hearts and increases our zeal and love for God. The more that we engage in the discipline of prayer, the greater our capacity to rout the demons!

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“In the deserts of the heart 
Let the healing fountain start.”

W.H. Auden (1907-1973) 

“The road of cleansing goes through that desert. It shall be named the way of holiness.”

Isaiah 35.8 (LXX)

It has been said that all true renewal within the life of the church comes through the desert fathers, or rather through the embrace of their wisdom. For it is not a worldly wisdom but the wisdom of the gospel, the wisdom of the kingdom that they set before us; not in an abstract fashion but through lived experience. 

The desert fathers looked deep within; precisely where Christ directs us to search for the kingdom. It’s not an easy thing to do; to look deep within oneself. Often what begins to emerge can seem ugly and repulsive to us. Sin has not left us untouched. We know its darkness, its suffering, and how it shapes the way we view ourselves, the world, and others. 

However, this inward gaze and the ascetic life aids us in seeing with a greater clarity not only our sin but the image of something beautiful beyond imagination; the soul made in the image and likeness of God, transformed and transfigured by his grace. Even in the midst of the struggle, the beauty of God‘s mercy and grace begins to manifest itself, and to reshape the human heart. We begin to understand that the perfection to which we are called is not moral perfection; nor is it the perfection of our natural virtues. It is to share in the very life of God. Christ strength is to become our strength. His virtue is to become our virtue. 

It has been said the Christ is the most beautiful of all human beings. In him, we see what we shall be through the grace of God. All that is dark in us, all that becomes an impediment to our ability to love gradually begins to fade away. We no longer cling to the demands of our own will or the pettiness of our ego. We begin to see that in Christ we have all and lack nothing. It is in this realization that we become truly free and capable of love. How beautiful!

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Darkness, whatever its source, cannot be driven out or overcome by mere force of will or through reason. The fathers reveal to us a darkness that exists within the human heart like no other - insensibility. It is a deadening of the soul and the death of the mind before the death of the body. We all have our vulnerabilities and have experienced wounds on both spiritual and emotional levels. To address this darkness requires an even greater trust in the grace of God to guide us through it and to provide us with what is necessary for healing. Each person is unique and with certain predispositions, including the predisposition to a more melancholic or morose state of mind. Furthermore, the human mind and heart are ever so changeable. 

It is also how the evil one can use these things to distort our vision of reality. We can be engaged in the religious and spiritual life and speaking about it and yet this can mask not only a sham piety but something even darker. We can live in the dark so long that it becomes the place of comfort. To move toward the light can be painful, especially if one has experienced trauma. 

More than any of the passions the remedy for this darkness consists of relying upon the grace of God and being drawn into the tenderness of Christ’s love. When our trust has been destroyed, we must allow Him to rebuild it. Where desire has been lost, we must wait for the Beloved to come to us to stir it into flame. Where wounds are so deep that they seem irreparable, it is only He who is the Lord of Life who can re-create us.

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The conclusion of hypothesis 41 was as beautiful as it was convicting. The fathers speak of a stability of mind and heart that deepens through the ascetic life and allows us to see the most subtle movements either toward or away from God. This subtlety of perception is unmatched in the spiritual tradition. The ascetic life revealed to the fathers not only sin and its manifestations, but the power of God’s grace to transform our lives in such a way that every impediment is removed that prevents us from loving unconditionally. The ascetical life is not an end in itself. It allows us to “ascend the cross”, the fathers tell us. The purity of heart that is achieved through it, the freedom from the passions, allows us to love in a self-emptying fashion, and to truly abandon ourselves to the will of God. Every illusion is set aside and one gradually comes to see with greater and greater clarity that “all is grace”. It is then that the desire for God compels us in our every word, thought, and action!

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Freedom! We often associate this word with our own rights in this world or our capacity to do as we will and go where we want. A kind of promise is put out to us - life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. 

Yet the image of freedom that is put before us by the saints and by Saint John in particular is attached to our willingness to be “detached” from the things of the world. God created all things good but in our sin our tendency is to idolize them. We seek our identity and happiness in the things of this world and we work ourselves to the point of exhaustion to protect these things as well as ourselves from others. We do not want to lose what we have or what we have earned. 

Yet we very quickly learn that this is no real happiness. In fact, it is the root of all evils. The deeper that root becomes, the greater our desire for the things of this world grows. It begins to produce the fruit of hatred, thefts, envy, separations, enmities, storms, remembrance of wrong, hardheartedness, and murderers. Therefore, what we hold up as having so much value for ourselves, and what seems to promise us freedom and safety eventually becomes our prison or the shackles that bind us. It is only in having tasted the things above that one begins to find joy, freedom from care, and the loss of anxiety. If we obtain this virtue, John tells us, we run the race with the swiftness of athletes of old - that is, stripped and unimpeded. 

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The Mystery of the Human Person! 

What comes forward in the ascetical writings of the fathers is not a moralistic or legalistic view of sin. Rather, we see within them a deep understanding of the complex beauty and dignity of the human person despite often being marred by sin. Perhaps too often we emphasize the negative; rather than fostering a desire both for God and for virtue and for the freedom and joy that it brings to the human heart. 

Like so many of the fathers, Saint John describes certain passions as a disease in need of remedy. While we must be disciplined in so many ways and vigilant in our thoughts, we never want to lose sight of how God has created us; that it is through our very being that we love and give ourselves in love. We are not meant to hate ourselves but rather sin. Self-contempt can often be our demise in the spiritual life. True love of the self begins with the desire for God; not with self-indulgence or laziness that reduces and diminishes the image we have of creation and our own goodness.

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Avoidance: often this can be the fundamental reason that an individual gravitates towards solitude, religious, or otherwise. We do not want to be in the presence of others, because it is there that we stand revealed - not only in their eyes, but in our own. In our interactions with others, we begin to see our dominant passions and the poverty of our sin. Our weak spots, blind spots and hard spots become perfectly evident to us. It is for this reason that the desert fathers counsel spending many years in the common life because it is there that true purification takes place. It is in our day-to-day struggle with the movement of our own thoughts and emotions and interactions with others, that sin is overcome and virtue begins to grow. To flee into solitude, prematurely, and even with the highest spiritual aspirations, promises only danger. It is perilous to enter into deep silence alone. If one falls, there is no one to pick them up. If one is swallowed up by delusion, there is no one to set them aright. How can we repent without having the other as one to whom we can direct our compassion or who reveals our darker side? 

Silence can never be an escape. In fact, silence can only be loved by one who has been freed from every impediment in order to encounter He who is Love and find true respite and peace in Him. 

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The fathers have often been accused of having a negative anthropology; that is, a negative view of the human person and human nature. However, as we read through St. John’s teachings on chastity and purity, we begin to see that their understanding arises from a very high and exalted anthropology. Their understanding of how God has made us, the beauty that is expressed in our very nature is so high that we must respect its preciousness as a gift from God. Furthermore we must also respect the power that lies within us and that it is through this nature that we are able to love and give ourselves in love to others and serve God. 

Indeed, it is true that sin has darkened our vision of this truth and our will has often become weak so that we misuse our nature and the appetites associated with it. Yet, God looks upon us with mercy and compassion and gives us every aid for healing. It is the Evil One that becomes our accuser who tries through shame to draw us into despair. 

Part of the relentless nature of our struggle with these sins is that we are forever bound by nature to this body of ours. Yet we must remember in the struggle that the body is destined to put on immortality and incorruptibility by God’s grace. We are called all even now to make use of our body through the ascetic life to share in this incorruptibility through purity of heart.

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In the advertisement for and description of this evening’s group, I wrote: “How does one deal with feelings of desolation in regards to one’s vocation, resentment towards others, being treated with envy or finding one’s circumstances to be a source of temptation? In the face of the many trials brought upon us by the evil one, great perseverance is needed and freedom from self will.”  This description, however, does not capture the depth of the wisdom that we were exposed to this evening. All of our asceticism, all the ways that we seek to remove the impediment of our passions, all the ways that we seek to remain focused upon the spiritual battle that lies within the heart has one end: to bring us to the place where we can enter into the Paschal Mystery in union with Christ. Not one of us should seek to leave the training, ground of the spiritual life prematurely or to choose to rest before God grants it. For it is precisely in this battle that all that remains an impediment to our ascending the cross with Christ is removed. Abba Isaiah, in the richest and most beautiful interpretation of the Passion, unpacks for us the meaning of every experience of our Lord; not that we might reflect upon it in an abstract fashion, but that we would take hold of His experiences as our own. We engage in the ascetical life not to reach the kind of moral perfection or emotional Nirvana but rather that we might reach the place where we can ascend the Cross with Christ. Once we are delivered from all of these things, we pass through our own Passion Week and enter into another, new age, thinking new and incorrupt thoughts. We are reminded of St. Paul’s words, “set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. For you’re dead.“ We leave our sins behind and find mercy together with those who are worthy of Him!

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Gustave Flaubert once wrote, “God is in the details.“ The truth of this statement is born out in this evening‘s writing from Saint John Climacus on the fathers’ understanding and description of the development of a passion within the soul. With great clarity, St. John takes us step-by-step through the inner movements of the mind and the heart. The battle begins with an assault. An image or an idea is encountered for the first time and enters into the heart. There’s no sin in this, but our response is important nonetheless. If we begin to converse with the image or idea its presence will take us a step further. We cannot allow ourselves to linger with such images even if we do not seem to be moved by them. Eventually, Saint John tells us, if we do linger we can fall into consent; the soul bends down, as it were, and begins to take delight in the temptation. Such temptations can also come upon us with force; seeking all at once to destroy any semblance of order or peace within the heart. What is important is that we struggle; that we engage in the spiritual battle and fight with equal or greater force against what seeks to afflict us. A passion develops whenever a sin nestles with persistence in the soul and forms a habit. It is then that the sins has put down deep roots and begins to guide and direct our decisions and actions. The passion is unequivocally condemned in every case.  St. John tells us, therefore, that we must seek to cut off the first assault with a single blow in order to prevent everything that might follow.

Finally, Saint John reveals to us just how humble we must be in the spiritual warfare. There are temptations that can come to us that he describes as a “flick of the mind”. They are instantaneous and inapprehensible.  There can be something in our life that triggers a memory or movement from the depths of our unconscious.  It gives rise to or stirs a passion that has not been healed, but merely buried. All of this teaches us that our desire must be directed toward God and God alone. The human heart can be a treacherous thing, and as the prophet asks, “who can trust it?“ It is God alone who we must trust. We must hope in his promises and the grace that he offers us from moment to moment. This is our path to healing.

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The beauty of virtue! So often we discuss the spiritual life as if the main goal or the end of it is simply the avoidance of sin. While avoiding sin certainly is essential, we are called to something far greater. What we received through the Paschal mystery and through our baptism is adoption as sons and daughters of God; the capacity by grace to share in the life of the Trinity. The fathers speak of deification. 

As we read through Saint John’s description of purity and chastity, these truths begin to manifest themselves. We engage in this constant struggle with our own appetites and with the temptations from the demons not simply to avoid sin, but to give and receive love in the way God intended; for that love to be rightly ordered and also, by grace, to become something that is supernatural. 

We are to love one another as Christ has loved us. It is often very difficult for us to understand this because more often than not we have never tasted the fruit of this virtue. We are surrounded by its opposite; and often have been immersed in that which is impure for most of our lives. Yet, even as we struggle for this virtue, we must not fall into a purely moralistic or legalistic view of life. It is through entering into the love of Christ and receiving that love through the holy Eucharist, that we are given the capacity to love in a selfless fashion. Furthermore, it is also through this Grace that we become capable of receiving such love without any impediment. May God open our eyes to the beauty of the life that He is made possible for us and the beauty of virtue!

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Stability of mind and heart: such are the characteristics of those who live the ascetic life. The mystery of the human person is such that we must suspend judgment of others as well as judgment of ourselves. 

On a psychological level, things are multi- determined. In other words, many things coalesce to form our thoughts and actions. Therefore, we must be very cautious in the spiritual life not to act quickly when tempted to leave our state of life or vocation. The change of mere externals does not bring healing. The passions that often drive us in the way that we view circumstances and others are only healed through persevering through many trials. 

We are ever so changeable. This is our great struggle and vulnerability, but it is also what allows us to repent. When we see our own sin or when we come to recognize the truth or when an illusion is revealed, we can turn toward God and cling to him and the healing he alone offers. “The Lord is an eternal rock”, the Scriptures tell us. Therefore, we must rest upon him. In him alone do we begin to experience an invincible peace and an unshakable hope.

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As we continue our reading of Step 15 on purity and chastity, gradually we are being shown a broader vision of what is offered to us through the ascetical life. Purity and chastity are not limited to dealing with our sexual appetites. Rather, we are striving to overcome any impediment to our seeing things and loving things in the manner in which God created us. Our vision is often distorted by our sin to the extent that we will objectify the things of this world and individuals to be used in whatever means we see fit. We lose sight of the dignity of the other as well as the beauty of creation. A heart that has been purified is capable of seeing the presence of God in every person, regardless of their deeds, and in every element of creation. A pure heart is the freest in its capacity to love. 

Perhaps many of us have never tasted such a thing even in the smallest measure.  It is for this reason that St. John presents us not only with aids in the battle for purity, but also with the image of the highest degree of purity  we see in saintly individuals. They are often moved to tears when their capacity to see the world and others is elevated from the purely natural to the supernatural; to see the very essence and beauty of all things created by God.

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We are truly being nourished on solid food in reading the fathers. They present us not simply with a moralistic or legalistic view of sin and its impact upon our lives in the lives of others. We are to hold the peace of another’s heart as precious as we do our own. And when we are stirred to anger or hatred because we have been maligned and mistreated, we must not give way to hatred. Rather, we must suspend judgment and recognize that others are first and foremost tempted to sin as we are. We can hate the sin and the evil and in fact we should do so. But we must never lose sight of the dignity and identity of others or our own identity. 

When we get angry, we can lose our stillness and peace of mind and heart. These things are often hard won and so we must be careful not to cast them off easily. Nor should we cast off brotherly love lightly. We often can treat others with harshness and lack of generosity - never realizing that we place our souls and theirs’ in jeopardy. Again, I’m not speaking simply in moralistic terms. If we goad others to anger, we can make them lose hope in the providence and love of God. If we treat their vulnerability, not with generosity and support but abuse it, then we sin against charity - we sin against Christ. 

We must learn to slow things down internally; for we do not see all ends; even when we think we see things clearly. Our goal should be to live in divine love and help this divine love be maintained in our relationships with each other. In fulfilling, the commandment to love, we are offered and promised everything - to be sons and daughters of God. In light of this, whatever lengths we go to guard our minds and our hearts from anger is worth it.

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John continues to draw us ever deeper into the mysteries of the human mind and heart. We are in a constant state of receptivity as human beings. We are constantly engaged with the world around us through our senses. Our vigilance, therefore, must be of such a nature that we take these things into consideration. The sense of touch, the sense of hearing, etc., all can be things that give rise to the passions. In and of themselves, they may not be sinful and may not lead to sin on many occasions. However, our understanding of the power of this receptivity leads to the realization that the evil one can use them as a source of temptation. There is no room for pride in the battle that emerges from sensuality. 

Even actions and behaviors from the past remain forever in the imagination and memory. They are deeply ensconced in the unconscious. No matter how long ago certain things took place, something in the present day can give rise to and trigger those memories ever so powerfully. Conceit will always be our downfall; when we think our spiritual practices or circumstances, place us outside the reach of temptation. Saint Isaac the Syrian said in the spiritual battle there is no Sabbath. In other words, there is no rest in this life when dealing with the temptations of the evil one.

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The subtlety of Temptations! Again, and again the fathers show us the relentless work of the evil one in drawing the mind ans the heart of individuals into sin. He can create within our hearts a kind of childishness; a veneer of sanctity or virtue. One can experience, joy or tears or consolation in their soul, but it can all be an illusion, and not truly rooted in repentance. It is for this reason that we so often backslide in the spiritual life. We do not let go of the attachments that we have to the things that lead us into sin. We may repent and go to confession, but within our hearts we still hold on to a multitude of things that give rise to temptation or that stimulate our inclination to particular sins. Fornication in particular is something that is seen as having great weight among the fathers because it is so tied to our very make up as human beings and to our bodily appetites and desires. We can fall into error in our thinking and be corrected of this error even when we cling to it with pride. But once we have acknowledged the error we are unlikely to return to it. However, when the sins of the flesh become tied up with our imagination and memory, and when we give ourselves over to the sin, the deeper the roots become. What is lodged in the imagination and memory is easily taken hold of again through fantasy, at first, and then finally an action. Therefore the sins the flesh often need the greatest commitment to ascetic disciplines in order to uproot them. We were told in the Scriptures that the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent to bear it away. Similarly, there are things that we must be willing to cut out of our life in order to keep us from falling into the same sins again. Our desire and our courage in doing so, however, is often lacking.

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Once again, we are presented with a kind of fickleness that can plague the human heart. We can be ever so changeable. This includes how we look upon even our greatest commitments. The moment something becomes a trial for us or where we are asked to endure something that is reprehensible, or that causes us some suffering, we will want to change the external circumstances of our life. 

However, the fathers in their writing show us how the evil one constantly seeks to magnify such experiences to the point that they breakdown our commitment to our particular vocation or vows. The one who has lived the common life for years can have the seed implanted in his heart that he would be happier or holier as an anchorite. Or one who is old of age might be tempted into thinking that his life no longer has value, and that he can no longer fulfill the rule in the way that he did as a young man. He begins to think about retiring from the religious life all together. Such thinking is pervasive and enters into every vocation. 

Having said this, however, we also have to be aware of the fact that we can face obstacles in our environment, such as the envy of others that becomes destructive or immorality. In these circumstances, it may be necessary to change one’s environment.  We need to recognize that we are responsible for the spiritual well-being and fidelity of others. If we treat others without love, without respect, then we can put their vocation and their spiritual life in jeopardy. This is a sober reminder of the solidarity that exist between us. The only way that we are allowed to treat another person is to love them.

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Piercing! The vision of a Saint becomes ever so sharp. Out of their own experience of the desert, and the spiritual warfare engaged in there, comes a wisdom that strikes, hopefully, our hearts. Our hearts can become hardened by being so long immersed in sin. When the sin becomes hardened and habitual, becomes a passion, it is not easy to break free from it. 

Yet words alone, even the words of the Saints, are unable to break us free. There must be within our hearts a faith and willingness to take hold of the grace of God that comes to us through Christ to enter into the fray, to fight the good fight of faith, and to engage fully in the ascetical life. 

Both the habit of sin and the temptation of the Evil One often keeps us mired deeply in darkness. Yet we must strive to let the little light that is given to us draw us forward and emboldened our hearts. A different vision of reality is set before us; one that has come into being through the Incarnation and the Paschal mystery. We are called, not simply to be good people and those of high natural virtue but rather sons and daughters of God. Christ’s virtue is to become our virtue. His strength must become our strength. This is not something that we seize upon with our own hands but receive with humility and gratitude. With these two virtues may we set out on the journey with an invincible hope.

We returned to hypothesis 40 and found ourselves sitting at the feet of Saint Ephrem the Syrian. We are shown with frightening clarity how the evil one works upon our minds and our hearts by making us question the value and the significance of our particular vocation.  We are often tempted to change externals; thinking that when we do so we will find a place that fosters greater sanctity, peace of mind and heart, or offers a greater opportunity for prayer. The evil one constantly seeks to tempt us to this instability in order that we might never put down deep roots - and so also never bear ripe fruit, if any fruit at all. 

The grass always looks greener on the other side. There are always going to be things that seem to be lacking in our life or in our relationships, whether real or perceived, that make us vulnerable to this kind of attack. Therefore, we are counseled to be equally relentless in putting things to the test. We must fast and pray and seek the counsel of others. Likewise, we must never make decisions in moments of desolation. It is not as though the fathers are saying that we can never be called to walk another path. Rather, they are telling us that all of our actions must be guided by prudence; a kind of practical wisdom that arises out of long experience within the inner desert of the heart. 

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How does one begin to speak about purity and chastity in an age that hyper-sensualizes the human experience?  When we define ourselves so tightly and, in particular, so tightly to disordered desire, how is it that we bear witness to and embrace the call of Saint John and the other fathers to purity? Part of the answer to these questions is to immerse ourselves in the vision of the fathers; their anthropology and psychology and the spirituality that shapes these things. However, this only begins to lead us to an understanding of who and what we have become in Christ.  If it remains purely notional we will inevitably be drawn back in to what the culture puts before us. What Christianity calls us to is to see ourselves only in light of Christ and to find meaning and identity in Him. Likewise, we must see the radical solidarity that exists between every one of us as human beings made in the image and likeness of God. We are called to a life of radical conversion and repentance.  When we look out into the world and see great evil or sin, our response must be to turn to God with even greater zeal and desire. We must embody the love, joy, peace, and purity of the kingdom. Anything less is going to ring hollow to the world. To speak of purity or chastity in simple moralistic or legalistic terms is to fail to understand what we have become in Christ. It is the Spirit of God that dwells within us and we are not called to embody natural virtue much less what private judgment puts forward as good. It is the beauty of Divine life that must shine forth in our every thought and action.

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The depth of the fathers’ understanding of the workings of the mind and the heart, the appetites and desires, is staggering. One of the great fruits of the ascetic life of the Desert fathers is what it reveals about the desert of the human heart. Jeremiah the prophet wrote: “The human heart is a treacherous thing.  Who can endure it“. How true this is! St. John Climacus gradually begins us to draw us in to the subtle workings of our bodily appetites, in particular those tied to sensuality. Our vision of ourselves, and others can become so easily distorted by our sin. We become unable to see the beauty not only of the world around us, but of the human person and every aspect of their being. We all use ourselves and others and the things of this world in a desperate attempt to fill a void within our hearts. We long for the love of God. Even the atheist, one who denies God with all their heart, experiences this longing. They may be completely unaware of its source but nonetheless desperately seek something to fill it. And in those times when we are not wrapped up in the attempt or the delusion of fullness, we experience depression. There is no human being that does not experience isolation and the pain of loneliness even when surrounded by others and an abundance of worldly goods. St. John painstakingly reveals to us the nature of the struggle for purity of heart in order that we might be freed from seeking for the love and fullness anywhere else than in the bosom of God. 

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Tonight we made the transition from St. John’s Step on Gluttony and its offspring to our discussion of Purity and Chastity in Step number 15. Again, as we read slowly through the text and begin to unpack it, we begin to see the larger picture; the image of humanity redeemed. We see what it means to be made in the image and likeness of God, and the experience of embracing our full dignity and identity. 

What is held out to us is an incorruptible freedom and joy as our love becomes ordered toward God. We begin to see the true beauty of the things of the world, of others, and of God himself. As I’ve often mentioned, the desert fathers were the first depth psychologists; they present to us the path that brings healing of soul. They see the human person in his fullness and we see in their writings such our true dignity and destiny. 

Our struggle often is found in the fact that we’ve never come to taste that freedom, the joy, the capacity to love unimpeded by our sin. The ascetic life is not about endurance, or personal health or the ordering of our life so much as it is about the desire for God, his love, and to share in the life that he makes possible for us. It has been said that “Beauty will save the world”. In the writings of the fathers, we are called to see this beauty first in the person of Christ; and in and through him the beauty of the life that is held out to us. May we desire it with all of our hearts.

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We rarely think of the importance of stability; not only in our external environment, but the stability of thought and emotion. It is precisely this that is addressed in Hypothesis 40. One can easily be tempted, with good reason, for a multitude of reasons, to move to another place, where one can find greater tranquility and peace in the spiritual life. Yet, such thoughts are often the work of the evil one. Wherever we go, we take our selves with us, including our passions. 

And so, we receive multiple stories and examples of monks and saints who were put to the test in this regard.  We can allow ourselves with great ease to begin to daydream; to imagine a kind of life that will bring peace and happiness to us or that would be pleasing to God. The danger is that we often are motivated by our personal judgment and sensibilities or by the actions of the evil one. 

We must understand that in this world we know no peace, except for that which is found in Christ. While we are in this world, we are engaged in constant spiritual warfare and should expect nothing less. In fact, we were told that we must become like the cherubim - “all eyes.”  We must constantly watch for the subtle ways that the evil one seeks to draw us away from the path of obedience and humility.

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How striking it is to hear the nature of the struggle with gluttony and the need for fasting spoken of with such zeal and clarity! Such practices have for the most part fallen by the wayside or have been minimized to such an extent as to be equally nonexistent. The unfortunate fruit of this is that we often have never tasted the freedom and the strength comes through ordering our appetite for food. Thus, the humbling of the mind and the body and the deepening of the experience of prayer through the stilling of the thoughts is also rarely experienced. 

We need to take hold of the wisdom of the fathers and their zeal that will allow us to put it into practice.  St. John tells us that when God sees the movement of the mind abs the heart towards Him through these practices that He will aid us with His grace. 

We also see that the fathers have a very clear sense of the workings of the human mind and how we experience our bodily appetites. Their observations of what takes place on a physiological level are astute and reveal the depth of their experience. All of it is meant to fashion within our hearts a renewed desire for the ascetic life. 

We must see that which is uniquely an distinctively Christian about these practices. For while St. John and the other fathers speak of them so frequently, they also understand that their beginning and end is found in one’s relationship with God. The desire for God’s love must compel us. 

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As a special reflection for this Holy Week, we chose a reading from Fr., Thomas Acklin‘s book “The Passion of the Lamb.”  In particular we reflected on the chapter entitled “Behold His Face.” As one participant in tonight‘s group stated: “This reflection is a gem!”  I agree. It is a rarest of gems and I’m grateful to Fr. Tom for writing it and the entire book. While small, it has had an incalculable effect upon me and I hope for all who listen to this podcast. 

What Fr. Tom seeks to do is to open our minds and our hearts to the truth revealed in the Passion of Christ. So often we approach this mystery bound by the limits of our reason and our sin. Fr. Tom challenges us to allow ourselves to be guided and drawn into the mystery by faith; to comprehend what God has revealed to us and what is beyond the measure of man’s mind. 

Many Christians throughout the centuries have struggled with the mystery of the Cross and the reality of our Lord’s suffering. Theologically, the human mind, almost in a form of resistance, intellectually and spiritually, tries to hold on to the notion of God being impassible. We are comfortable with notions of God being all powerful and all knowing. What we have trouble understanding and what we are often unwilling to embrace is the reality of a God who is Omni-kenotic and Omni-vulnerable. What Fr. Tom wants us to reflect upon is a God in whom we see and attribute not human deficiencies and sinfulness, hatred, ignorance, or illness. Rather, he wants us to contemplate and attribute to God in an infinite and perfect way the good qualities that we have in a finite and even deficient way. Thus, Fr. Tom says, rather than being impassible, incapable of feeling or having passion as we do as human beings, it would be more accurate to say that not only Christ but all three persons of the Trinity are infinitely caring, infinitely affected by us; Omni-passible. To believe such a thing is to understand that “at the height of his agony, he could see, not only the people who stood before him, jeering or weeping, but all the people of all time. He saw us in our loving and in our refusing to love, our sinning and our repenting. At the same eternal moment, he took on all the moments of every life and death. He could be the infinite love of God in person to each human being who ever lived, and who will ever live.” 

May God bless us this Holy Week with the gift of faith to see this love, this perfect vulnerability, even in the smallest measure.

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We continued to our reflection on step number 14 - gluttony, or that “clamorous mistress, the stomach.”  We are being exposed to the wisdom of the fathers, so deeply rooted in their experience of human nature and how it has been effected by sin. St. John, in his typical fashion, reveals to us the subtleties (psychological, emotional and spiritual) of how we are deceived by the evil one and how our bodily appetites can be used against us. It is precisely because our appetite for food is natural and needed for sustenance that it is something that can be used against us and so powerfully. 

This step shows how St. John and the other fathers were not only spiritual warriors, but the first depth psychologists. They knew how the mind and the heart work. We are easily deceived and easily moved to rationalize our use of food. Perhaps what is most significant is that St. John shows us how essential this practice of fasting and abstinence is in our spiritual life. We can’t be dabblers or minimalists. Because it is such a part of who we are, our appetite for food must be formed and shaped both by discipline and by the grace of God. What and how we eat is often a reflection of our emotional state a response to a need and desire for consolation. Rather than nourishing ourselves upon the love of God, we will choose some thing that offers immediate satisfaction - even though we know it is ever so temporary.

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Tonight, our 100th Episode of the study of the The Evergetinos, we began reading Hypothesis 39.  The subject matter is manifold. We are not to trust or be overly confident in ourselves, our own judgment or our spiritual strength. Rather, we are to trust first and foremost in the grace of God and also the intercession of our spiritual father. Every good that we accomplish takes place because of God’s mercy; this includes the prayers, and the intercession of one’s elder. 

We are presented with a multitude of stories of individuals who were protected, strengthened, or guided by the prayers of their spiritual fathers. However, we are not to see this as  magic; nor are we to see it as something that would protect us from hardship, or the crosses we may be called to carry. Rather what is emphasized for us is the radical solidarity that exists among us as men and women of faith. We do not travel the road through this world in isolation. Rather, we are under the care of others or we are responsible for on another’s well-being. 

As so many times before, such stories emphasize for us the need for humility. We have to let go of the illusion of power. In fact, we cannot present the gospel from a standpoint of power, at least not as it is seen and understood in the world. The love that we bear witness to is obedient and self-emptying. The truth and the wisdom that we speak is that of the kingdom. Are these the realities the guide us in our life?  Are our sensibilities any different from those who do not have faith?

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Tonight we picked up with Step, 14 on “that clamorous mistress, the stomach“. Climacus begins to draw us into a discussion of one of the most important and neglected spiritual practices - fasting and the struggle with gluttony. 

This is a struggle, Saint John tells us, that remains with us through our entire life. Our desire for food or our misuse of food is something that is part of the very fabric of our life. It is a bodily appetite. Not unlike other appetites, it must be ordered toward the good or in the way that is in accord with the wisdom of God. 

Yet, John tells us, gluttony is hypocrisy of the stomach. In a sense it deceives us. Even when we are filled, it tells us that we are empty, and even when we are bursting, it “cries out that it is hungry.“.  It also leads us to devise seasonings, and sweet and rich dishes. The moment that we think that we have control of it, it shows itself in another area of our life. Unchecked, it leads to something even more serious - fornication. If we do not order this basic appetite for food, then we are going to be disordered and the use of our other bodily appetites, including our sexual appetite. And so, St. John tells us that he who coddles the body makes it wilder.  If we do not control it, then it will overcome us. 

If we are self-aware, we know we eat for many different reasons. On an emotional level, we often eat to console ourselves or because we are feeling aggressive or anxiety. We distract ourselves and deal with feelings of emptiness by filling our bodies with food. There are many ways that we convince ourselves that restraining ourselves is inappropriate. For example, we tell ourselves that hospitality demands that we break our fasting practices. Rather than being honest with ourselves and others, we freely let go of these disciplines, not out of love for others but to satisfy our baser needs.

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As we move more deeply into the first volume of the Evergetinos - reading hypothesis 38 - we find ourselves also being drawn more deeply into the mystery of humility and obedience. The wisdom of God, revealed in our Lord through his incarnation and through the Paschal mystery, shows us the vulnerability of divine love and humility. For the love of us Christ empties himself, becomes a slave and obedient unto death on the cross. It is upon him that we must fix our gaze if we are not to be drawn into the illusions of pride. 

Religious people are not above having their own delusions; including and especially the delusion of holiness. We hold on to the demands of our ego. Pride rules our will.  Thus, we were given multiple stories this evening of God in his providence guiding souls along a path He desires and presenting them with circumstances that unexpectedly revealed to them these greater truths. There is so much of us that is prideful that we are often blind to the humble ways that God comes to us and reject those through whom He speaks to us.

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INTERIORIZED MONASTICISM PART II FUNDAMENTAL ELEMENTS

• Prayer
• Eschatological Maximalism
• Evangelical Counsels as Seen through Three Temptations of Christ in the Desert:

1. Poverty

Next Week:

2. Chastity: the Sacredness of Creation and the Virginity of Heart that Should Belong to All

3. Obedience to God: Receptivity to the Spirit of Truth and the Creative Freedom of the Life of Grace.

How do we talk about and understand despondency? I never heard about the word or the nature of the vice until I was in my 20s and after having read the fathers. And yet we hear from the fathers that it is the greatest and gravest of the eight capital vices. It afflicts the soul in such a way that it draws it into darkness. The soul loses its capacity to see the presence of God or to love the things of God. It becomes most dangerous when we are engaged in the spiritual life in isolation; either as those who live the life of a hermit, or as those who see the spiritual life as a private affair.  We live in a radical solidarity with each other, and with God. Our understanding of this, and our embrace of that reality may be the one thing that keeps us from falling into a general death. 

This demon uses the most subtle forms of temptation to make us lax in our spiritual practice or come to despise it all together. There are very few remedies for it for this reason. One must remember death and the brevity of our life. We must understand that we are in the end times and see the urgency of the moment. We must also cling to obedience; placing our thoughts before another and allow them to guide us when we cannot see the path before us. 

Prayer filled with hope, St. John tells us, is the only thing that brings this vice to utter death. Only when we cling to He who is life and love and hope and let go of the illusion that we can simply endure the spiritual trials of this world on our own will this vice be conquered. But once it is conquered, a person has come to experience all that is good; they are prepared for every spiritual battle that lies ahead.

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How does one approach something such as grumbling and murmuring against others, or complaining about what our judgment and sensibilities react to negatively in our lives? How is it that we suspend that judgment? Beyond this, how is it that we let it go all together and allow ourselves to be drawn along in the darkness of faith; where God alone illuminates the path before us to draw us into the truth and the love of the kingdom? 

The short answer to all of these questions is: through experience. Only God can reveal to the human heart that has the faith, perhaps only the size of a mustard seed, the depths of His mind and His truth. The greatest miracle, if you will, is to move the mountain of our ego and self-esteem. Our passions make it so difficult to keep our focus solely upon God, upon his love, and upon the truth that is being revealed to us. 

These stories are not about disciples being slavishly obedient to their masters no matter what the circumstances. In fact, the stories given to us tonight were how novices and disciples, who were pure of heart, were able to see the truth with clarity and bring about the conversion of their Elders who had lost their way. The stories are presented to us in order that we would not be tempted into condescension. We must understand that God can reprove us and correct us in the most unexpected of ways. What these hypotheses (36 & 37) reveal to us is the preeminence of humility and love. Age, experience or depth of discipline are no guarantee that we will see the truth or embrace it. May God have mercy and illuminate our hearts.

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I have one word for tonight‘s group: Beautiful! Repentance “brings to us the power of the living God, revealing once again, the true Christ Jesus who dwells in us.” As with so many aspects of the faith, we have a tendency to compartmentalize not only the practice of virtue or of prayer but of our relationship with God as a whole. Yet our faith and our relationship with God should touch the very fabric of our beings and shape the essence of every relationship and every work that we engage in throughout the course of our lives. It should shape also our experience of death and our realization of our own mortality. Repentance is not an episodic reality but a continual effort, the continual straining of the heart - reaching out to God to experience his love and mercy. In this sense it is the most important of things.

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INTRODUCTION TO INTERIORIZED MONASTICISM

Interiorized Monasticism and Ascetic Ideal:
• Obscured: Out of reach to majority.
• Revealed: Fundamental principle of life in Christ.

Eschatological Dimensions:

• Obscured: Life cut off from the world or world cut off

  from life of the kingdom.

• Revealed: Incarnation and kingdom of God present;

  Kingdom within through gift of the Spirit (active eschatology, touching every aspect of the world; living now in light of the End).

  Beauty Saves the World:

• Obscured: Culture as cult, autonomous from God and

  guided by sensibilities of the age.

• Revealed: Rediscovery of culture through the beauty

  of holiness. Jesus is the Holy One - the most beautiful of the sons of men. He is the perfect icon, manifesting God unveiled.

  The Monastic Ideal:

• Obscured: Return to the ancient forms of monastic

  ascesis.

• Revealed: Internalized. The human psyche is renewed

  from within.

  Five Fundamental Elements of Interiorized Monasticism (Upcoming Lectures):

  • Prayer
  • Eschatological Maximalism • Poverty
  • Chastity
  • Obedience

Tonight we read Step number 12 on Lying. Surprisingly this has always been a challenging step to read and to read as a group. Immediately our minds begin to swirl with the costs of loving the Truth and understanding that Truth is a person. Our starting point in such discussions is often examples that are extreme; things or circumstances that people might face within this life where lying might be justified. St. John addresses this and much more within the step. However, one has to be willing to suspend judgment and allow St. John to guide us along a path that deepens our sensitivity in regards to the Truth as a whole. Our starting point must be Christ. We must begin to understand that lying is a sin against charity, and to lie when making a vow or an oath is a denial of God himself. St. John understands very well that the Evil One can use something as innocent and enjoyable as humor to justify and to legitimize lying.  Yet, John tells us that there are no small lies and once spoken they have an effect upon ourselves and others. They diminish the spirit of mourning; that is, compunction within the human heart. In doing so they distract us from the remembrance of God and the things of God. We must remember that God has given us a conscience, a means of knowing the truth with Him. This is what we must form through the gospel and through our participation in the life of Christ. We must also remember that the Evil One is the Father of Lies and will use a lie under the pretext of protecting others. In the face of this, St. John tells us, “when we are completely cleansed of lying, then we can resort to it, but only with fear and as occasion demands.” Only when the heart has been completely purified, where there is no love of falsehood and where there is the presence of great discernment, can such a decision be made. To love truth, St. John tells us, is the root of every good because it is to love Christ.

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In these hypotheses, we have been reflecting upon the practice of asceticism, especially in light of the relationship between an Elder and his disciple; that is, in relationship to obedience. We are shown in these stories the ABC’s of the ascetic life and in particular that of the virtue of obedience. 

What does it mean to let go of private judgment? What does it mean to set aside one’s will even in small things in our day-to-day life? How do we train the mind and the heart in this virtue; so that when we are asked to pick up our cross or when we are reduced to raw endurance and cannot see the road ahead of us, we are able to respond in love?  We are shown in the stories that one must begin small. It is in letting go of our sensitivities in the small things, and allowing love to trump everything that this virtue takes root. It means being more attentive to the “other”, to what is asked of us and what people need, than to holding on to what we want, or what seems right or convenient to us. 

There is part of us that shrinks back in a spirit of objection to what is being taught here. It seems unnatural to us. But what is really being asked of us or rather where we are being led to embrace is the supernatural. What we are being guided to is the perfect love and self emptying obedience that we see in Christ. We should have a similar desire to have obedience to God’s will as our very food.  We must see it as something that sustains and nourishes us mystically. 

Not fulfilling the will of God or choosing the path of sin should become something that is abhorrent to us. Such lessons can be learned only with humility. Beyond this, we are shown the incredible responsibility of those who are elders. Their actions, their requests and demands of their disciples must be rooted in the desire for their salvation, and for their good. They will be held accountable as shepherds.

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Tonight we explored an often neglected aspect of the spiritual life; or one might better say an essential part of the spiritual life – Fasting. Throughout the spiritual tradition, we have heard the Saints tell us that “prayer without fasting is weak” or that “where there is no prayer and fasting there are demons.”

With the coming of Christ, however, we see a unique and distinctive meaning of fasting emerge. It is not only a discipline to help order the appetites or a form of penitence. It is tied directly to Christ: what we see in His practice and in what He teaches us about it.  His own fasting is guided by the Holy Spirit in preparation for embracing the Father’s will, and His desire that it might be accomplished. Beyond this, Christ teaches us that our practice of fasting is forever tied to our desire for Him. He is the Heavenly Bridegroom and each soul the Bride. We see and experience in Him the One alone who can satisfy the deepest desires of the human heart. He is the Bread of Life. 

The focus of our discussion this night was on recapturing not only the practice of fasting, but seeing it as something that is to be “loved”, precisely because it draws us to Christ. It is not a discipline but a path to draw nearer to the Beloved.  

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Tonight, we read Step number 11 on “talkativeness and silence.”  Fittingly, it is very brief, if not the briefest of all of the steps of The Ladder. This brevity is St. John’s way of teaching us that so much of our speech involves vainglory; putting ourselves on display. We seek through it to step out of ourselves; betraying the painful experience we have as human beings of our lack of identity.  God has created us for himself. He has created us in his image and likeness precisely that we might not experience ourselves in isolation, but rather in communion. However, to enter into communion with God means to step out of our limited ways of perceiving the world around us and reality as a whole. This means allowing God, through the silence,
to draw us in faith into the experience of His life, light and love.  To give ourselves over to talkativeness is to find ourselves dissipated. Our desire for God cools and the emptiness that we feel drives us to fill our lives with anything and everything so that we do not feel alone. Despite having God dwelling within us, once we lose sight of him, silence becomes an enemy. Therefore, John tells us that we must foster silence as a habit. We must allow God to show us its value, and what it makes possible for us. The first step is to create external silence. Once we have done this, we often see the unsettledness of our minds and hearts.

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Obedience!  The root of the word is to hear or to listen. What emerges in reading the fathers is that our capacity to hear the word of God is rooted in our willingness to set aside our own willfulness, ego, and our private judgment. We often become obstinate and entrenched in our own view of things in such a way that we are no longer able to hear the advice or counsel of others. We are shown in this evening’s text that sometimes we must be left to our own devices to experience the poverty of our choices that are contrary to the will of God and His love. 

What also emerges is that obedience is not rooted in law but love. Obedience is the fruit of a deep relationship with God, and with one’s spiritual elder. An elder must love his disciple, and recognize that he bears responsibility for his salvation and so must give him constant care. The disciple must reciprocate this love and respect. In doing so, he enables the elder to be a true shepherd and not a mere hireling. This mutual obedience elevates the entire church and allows it to make present the humble love of Christ crucified to the world.

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This evening we continued and completed Step number 10 on “slander and calumny.”  Something very special emerges about John in the writing of this step. We see something very personal about John’s capacity to love and his purity of heart. He acknowledges his own struggle with judging others as sinners, when in reality they were pure of heart in secret. Thus, John’s repeated counsel is not to judge at all; even when we see things with a kind of clarity. We often have blind spots and dark spots in our evaluation of the others. Beyond this, the Evil One puts before us smoke, if you will, making us think that there is sin present where none exist. 

All that we are allowed to do is to love others. This means that we always attribute their sin to the action of demons. We are to look for the good in others and look for ways that we can support and lift them up if they are struggling. This means setting aside the morbid delight that we take in judging and the feeling of emotional power that we think it gives us over and against them. We must acknowledge the radical solidarity that exist between us and foster a spirit of generosity towards each other. To seize for ourselves a prerogative that belongs only to God is ruinous to the soul. May God preserve us!

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Tonight we picked up with Hypothesis 34. Again we are introduced into the practice of asceticism; in particular, how it is embraced in the spirit of obedience. We were given multiple stories of individuals who, out of love for their elder, respond with an immediacy to their demand or request. In each case we are shown the deep fruit that this bears. 

However, the greater task for us is to look at our lives and to see if we have prepared our hearts to receive the seed of our Lord‘s word as he calls us to the life of holiness. Do we respond with swiftness when called to prayer or with zeal when called to embrace the practice of fasting or urgency when called respond to someone in need or jeopardy? 

What the stories show us is that obedience is based upon a relationship, not law. It is love that makes us run to respond to Christ and to those He has given to us to guide us along the path to Him. If our asceticism or obedience lacks this love, then it is something that is suspect.

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The subtle movements of the human heart and mind stand revealed while reading the Ladder of Divine Ascent. As one makes one’s way through the text, it becomes clear that it is an inevitability. We must stand ready to have our hearts illuminated and the places that we desire to keep in darkness, whether consciously or unconsciously, exposed. Yet, somehow, when these words come from the pen of a Saint, there is a healing that one begins to experience; even as we know the sting of the words. Knowing and seeing the truth lightens the mind and the heart and opens us to experience the grace and the mercy of God. By removing the impediments to the action of that grace, we find ourselves no longer running with a heavy tread under the burden and the weight of some hidden guilt or wound, but freely and swiftly moving towards He who is Love. 

The jarring nature of John’s words is eventually overcome by the confidence in his desire, as well as God’s, to bring us healing. Such is the case with John’s description of the remembrance of wrongs. He makes it clear that without remedy, it can poison the heart and become dark spite. The more we nurture our anger, the more the heart becomes poisoned, and we eventually only see the faults of others.  To be free of this burden, he tells us, allows us to boldly ask our Savior for the release of our own sins. 

John would have us show no hesitancy and experience no doubt about what coming to God brings us. If we do not attend to this wound, what is born from it is slander. This, he tells us, drains the blood of love and becomes the patron of a heavy and unclean heart. In our anger, we may diminish another through our words, but the consequence that has for ourselves is far greater. It is a coarse disease that only Christ and gazing upon Christ crucified can heal.

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Reading the fathers deeply is unsettling. It strikes against every sensibility that we have and calls into question our perception of reality itself. In this sense, their writings are meant to illuminate the gospels for us and allow them to challenge us. So often we become lukewarm simply because things have become familiar and comfortable to us. We lose sight of the fact that in the face of Christ’s teaching individuals tore their garments and repeatedly wanted to put him to his death and eventually did accomplish this. 

What does reading the gospel or the fathers give rise to within our hearts and consciences? The stories about obedience in this hypothesis are startling; we can hardly imagine ourselves enduring such things for a moment, let alone seeing them as something that are a means to freeing us from self-will and from the ego. What is it that we love? What stirs our hearts to their greatest desire? What are we willing to die for? Is Christ our Beloved or merely the construction of our minds and imaginations to make us feel safe in this world?

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There are certain moments while reading the fathers when one trembles. The truth expressed is so vivid and pierces so deeply that the experience of it is visceral. One is shaken.  This is not easy to endure, and perhaps there are moments when reading such texts becomes a stumbling block for our minds and our hearts. However, when they speak the truth of Christ and when they reveal the depth of love that we are called to in Him, ultimately these words are healing. The fathers, in so many ways, are spiritual physicians. Their words cut like a scalpel and cut deeply. But they cut out the “rot” as John describes it. The remembrance of wrongs, which is the offspring of anger, is not something that we can remove on our own. Untreated it spreads like a cancer. The fact, John tells us it has no offspring because it poisons the soul so completely that it makes us incapable of love. 

May God give us the grace to listen with humility and gratitude. We are given such loving fathers who desire nothing but our healing. When we begin to trust that, then their words become as bright and illuminating as the sun.

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The further we get into the Evergetinos, the more we are poised to begin to understand something important: our pursuit of virtue, such as obedience, is rooted first and foremost in our love and desire for God. We embrace the ascetical life, we embrace very difficult practices and and pursue virtue, not as a test of endurance. It is a response to a love and a desire deeply rooted within our hearts. The grace of God begins to allow us to comprehend that we are heirs of the kingdom, that we are sons and daughters of God. To pursue this path outside of this context is to make ourselves the most pitiable of all creatures. To embrace all, even the hatred of the world for the love of Christ is most beautiful and precious of things. 

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As we follow Saint John’s teaching on the passion of anger, we truly begin to get a sense of what a great spiritual teacher and physician he and the other fathers are. St. John has the capacity to see the various ways that anger manifests itself in our lives, the subtlety of the demon’s trickery, and the danger of our own blindness to self-conceit. St. John makes it very clear to us that if we struggle with the passion of anger we must be willing to place ourselves in a situation where we are going to be able to diagnose it and bring it before another in order that a healing balm might be applied. The person who is in the grip of anger is going to bring agitation to all those around him. Therefore, a person must go where this passion might revealed by testing and overcome by trial. Austerity in life and firmness from one’s spiritual director or elder is often needed to break one free from the grip of this passion. However, John tells us, he who has won this battle by sweat has conquered all the passions that precede it. Let us then not be afraid to be mortified in regards to our self-esteem and pride; for they both collaborate to hold us captive.

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What is our standard of judgment? When we consider anything about life in this world, or our struggle with vice, or seeking to grow in virtue, where do we look? So often we, even in our spiritual struggles, look to our own reason and judgment. The problem with this is that we only see partial truths, even when we see things clearly. We all have hard spots and blind spots in our perception of reality and of others. If anything, John’s writing on anger and meekness remind us that there must be a willingness as Christians to suspend our judgment and allow the grace of God to touch our minds and hearts; so that we can perceive the greater reality about the other person, even when they commit evil against us. The standard for us is Christ. The standard is the cross and cruciform love. It is when our minds and our hearts have been shaped by this Love, that we begin to be guided by the spirit of peace; and our minds are illuminated with the greater truth of the goodness of the other created in the image and likeness of God and redeemed by the blood of Christ.

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What does obedience allow us to hear? This may seem to be a funny question. In light of how we often characterize obedience or think about it in our own lives, so often it is about setting aside our own will and having to do what another tells us to do. But in light of the fathers’ writings, it becomes clear that obedience is not a kind of slavishness. The etymology of the word obedience is “to hear.”  It allows us to listen and to receive a Word from God that reveals divine truth. Obedience raises us up to comprehend the very love that has saved us. 

Of course, one must admit that it is jarring to our sensibilities and our reason. When we hear the stories of the monks’ obedience, we begin to see that it had to do more with their desire for God, their yearning to be conformed to Christ who emptied himself to take upon our humanity and become obedient even unto death. Our obedience leads us to hear that word spoken in our own heart, inviting us to draw close to Christ in every way. This means embracing a wisdom that is wholly unlike what is made manifest within the world and so often shaped by sin. The fathers are living icons of the gospel. What they write and what they do becomes a window revealing the path that we are to walk and that will draw us closer to Christ. 

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Today someone mentioned to me that Saint John Climacus does not mince words when speaking about the spiritual life, and in particular when speaking about the passions. This is unequivocally true. John does not varnish the truth. His heart has been formed in such a way that it would be impossible to do so; his view of God, man, redemption, and sin is shaped by the cross, and by the fullness of the gospel. Such is the case in our reading this evening of Step 8. St. John begins to define for us the nature of freedom from anger and the virtue that leads us along that path: meekness. 

In this step like so many others, our view of reality and our experience as human beings is going to be challenged. Our experience of aggression in ourselves and from others must be seen now through what has been revealed to us in Christ and through the Cross. We must allow the grace of God to shape our identity so deeply that we remain unmoved either by dishonor or by praise. Meekness is allowing the love of God to touch our emotions and affective state as well as the incensive faculty that protects us from sin. 

The Scriptures teach us that “the anger of man does not bear fruit acceptable to God.”  The reason for this is that such anger is often driven by an insatiable desire that we be treated in a fashion that satisfies our vainglorious needs or our sense of justice. Anger, however, can become so deeply rooted within the soul that bitterness becomes the lens through which we view relationships, and circumstances of every kind. It can become the log in our eye that prevents us from seeing any goodness in the world or others. Let us, then, listen attentively to what John says and allow him to guide us along this challenging path.

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To have Christ praying within us, to have Christ fasting within us, to have Christ suffering within us. We hear from the fathers that the ascetical life is meant to draw us into deeper communion with the Lord. The ascetic life must begin and end with Him. If not, it will bear no fruit. Only when our spiritual life is elevated by the grace of God does it become pleasing in God’s sight. Even our virtues must be perfected by His grace. We may have spent many years in silence and prayer and the pursuit of virtue. Then God in his providence may lead us along another path in order that he might fulfill the deepest desires of our heart as well as to bring us to salvation and the perfection of virtue. 

We can have no conceit in this regard. Only God sees the nature and the depth of our desire and love. We must follow Him and allow Him to guide us through those He puts in charge of us or those He makes responsible for us. At times, it is only when we are pushed beyond the limits of human strength that we begin to see the power and the action of God’s grace. 

Again we can have no illusions about our own desire. As strong as it might be, and even if it does come from God, our weakness and poverty can only be overcome through His mercy and by His wisdom. We must allow Him to draw us more and more deeply into the Paschal Mystery. We must allow our hearts to be shaped by Divine and self-emptying love.

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What does it mean to live in Christ and for Him? Perhaps this is a question that we rarely ask ourselves because it’s too threatening. What would our lives look like if our response to God was absolute? What would our mourning for sin look like if our love for God was filled with desire for Him and for His will? 

One would imagine that life, our lives would look much different. It is not just one part of ourselves that is to be touched by the grace of God, but every aspect of our being, our very essence. Saint John and the other Desert fathers speak of mourning for one’s sin in such a visceral fashion because they understood that they were called to participate in a Godly love. God took our flesh upon Himself in order that we might come to experience the fullness of His life and love. To experience themselves as turning away from this gift or betraying this love could only bring about the deepest mourning and their hearts. The question that we perhaps should be asking ourselves is: “why do we lack this quality of mourning?”

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Our journey with Saint John Climacus has not been an easy one; in fact, we get a taste of walking upon that narrow path that leads to the kingdom simply through reading about his vision of the spiritual life and his experience. It reflects the reality and the challenges of the spiritual life, and in particular a life of penance and repentance. To give ourselves over to God, to seek his love above all things, to desire him more than we desire our own lives is the path that St. John is putting before us. 

However, there is something within us that resists walking this path. Quite simply it is our ego - the self. Even in our pursuit of God, we can make ourselves every bit as willful in our spiritual discipline as we are in our relationships with others, and in our day-to-day work. Through his description of compunction (sorrow over one’s sins eventually leading to the experience of Godly Joy) St John is seeking to free us from the grip self-centeredness and its delusions.

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We continued our reading of hypothesis 32 and once again the words of the Fathers are piercing, very much like the words of scripture. This is what makes them ring so true. The Fathers never seek to varnish the truth. The path that we are called to walk upon is the path of Christ. We are called quite literally self-crucifixion. We are to die to self and sin, and to live for God and to live for Him alone. St Paul reminders us: “it is no longer I who lives I (ego) but Christ who lives within me. 

It is for this reason that monasteries would put men to the test, making them wait long periods of time before entering. Why do you want to be here? Do you understand what it is that you were taking upon yourself and what you are setting aside?  Do any of us understand what it is to love in the way that we have been shown on the Cross and in the Holy Eucharist?

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