#218 Body Shaming? How to LOVE Your Body AND Want to Get in Your Best Shape

This topic is one that can be sensitive, so we want to handle it appropriately. As usual, the subject came up because of an activity in Greg’s online class for teens — Habits for a Successful Life — and a resulting email from a mom. (We love getting emails).

The students took a self-assessment of multiple areas of life—mental, emotional, physical, etc. For the physical assessment, they held their breath, touched their toes, counted pushups, and measured ‘grabbable’ belly skin/fat. This is similar to BMI exams, which measure belly, triceps, and thigh fat.

One parent was concerned that grabbing the stomach brought “attention to this area of their body and was damaging to their confidence… As a certified personal trainer, it was strongly emphasized to never ask a client to assess the health of their bodies in this manner—it creates body shaming and sets a client up for failure.”

Some people do struggle with body image and obsess about minor skin they can grab around their middle. The world of Instagram convinces them they need to be twigs.

“As a mom, I’m trying to teach my kids to love their bodies. They don’t have to look like people on social media. What matters is being healthy and taking care of themselves by eating well and exercising—which they’re doing.”

We absolutely agree. Girls and boys should not be obsessing about their appearance or comparing themselves to others, especially photoshopped images online.

And yet, BMI and body fat do matter, because excess fat can lead to long-term health issues—heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, stroke, and cancer. We need to know if our body fat is increasing or decreasing—not because we care about image, but because we care about health and wellness.

We must teach our children to accept this balance—a need to know without obsessing.

There’s more to this subject than just physical health. In our experience, any emotion, including shame and guilt about our bodies, points to deeper issues.

The truth is, no one can ‘shame’ you or make you feel anything. Emotions arise from within. If uncomfortable emotions surface, it’s an opportunity to practice self-awareness. Why do I feel this way? This helps develop internal congruence—becoming whole and resilient, no matter what others say or do.

This episode is the conversation we’ve had—and continue to have—with our own daughters (and sons). We discuss how each of us must get in tune with our bodies and let that guide us to our own unique level of health and fitness based on long-term goals and desires. Our bodies know what our ideal shape is meant to be, and they respond through biochemistry, emotions, and feedback loops.

If you’re concerned about today’s cultural messages around body image—but also wondering how to find a healthy balance—listen to this episode now.

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