Masking is a survival technique used by neurodivergent individuals to fit in and avoid harassment or bullying. It takes a toll on mental health, leading to anxiety, low self-esteem, and a constant fear of slipping up.
In this episode, Jordan James and Simon Scott discuss the concept of masking and unmasking in neurodivergent people. They explore the reasons why individuals mask their true selves, the fear of not being taken seriously, the pressure to conform to societal norms, along with the deep masking experienced during teenage years. The conversation explores the benefits and challenges of masking disabilities, the dehumanizing perspective towards people with disabilities and why unmasking is a journey of self-discovery and acceptance.
Takeaways:
- Society's judgment of neurodivergence and disability as weaknesses contributes to the fear of being authentic and the need to mask.
- Social media can be a breeding ground for bullying and judgment, as people feel detached and empowered to tear others down.
- The desire for companionship and acceptance drives individuals to mask their true selves, but it is important to find a balance between fitting in and being authentic.
- Authentic friendships are built on being real and accepting each other's true selves.
- Teaching children to mask in certain situations can help them navigate the world, but it's important to also encourage their authentic selves.
Chapters
00:00 Intro
00:32 Masking and Unmasking
01:30 The Freedom and Comfort of Masking
04:22 The Toll of Masking
05:23 The Challenge of Being Fully Authentic
06:22 The Persona of Masking
07:22 The Loss of Energy and Foundations
08:20 The Deep Rest from Masking
09:19 Putting on Masks to Fit In
10:19 Using Comedy and Stand-up to Mask
11:42 The Unmasking Effect of Conversations
12:40 The Intensity of Unmasking
13:37 The Breakthroughs of Speaking Out Loud
14:26 The Impact of the Podcast
19:15 Knowing and Communicating Limits
20:14 The Need for Companionship
21:35 The Pressure to Fit In
23:56 The Dark Side of Social Media
25:17 The Fear of Disability
28:15 The Fear of Being Ostracized
29:10 The Toll on Mental Health
30:16 The Pressure to Meet Neurotypical Standards
31:43 The Gazelle Among Lions
33:39 The Fear of Ridicule
35:02 The Dehumanizing Experience
37:25 The View of Neurodivergence as a Developmental Disability
39:17 The Gaslighting and Lack of Self-Trust
40:14 The Benefit of Masking
45:04 Hyperfocus on Autism
46:29 Uncomfortable with Asperger's Label
47:56 Hyperfixation on Autism Stereotypes
50:21 Stimming and Comfort Objects
56:41 Masking as a Teenager
01:02:54 Starting the Unmasking Process
01:05:14 Struggling with Self-Identity
01:07:14 The Privilege of Masking
01:18:24 Teaching Masking to Neurodivergent Children
Whether you're Neurodivergent yourself, a friend, family member, or simply curious about this extraordinary way of experiencing the world, this podcast is your guide to unravelling The Neurodivergent Experience.
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