How to Deal With Bias as Parents | Destini Ann Davis

We all have biases. Every single one of us.

They're the mental shortcuts our brains built when we were young—and most of us never thought to question them. But what happens when your child starts forming their own identity, and it challenges everything you thought you believed?

In this episode, Eli sits down with Destini Ann Davis—bestselling author of Very Intentional Parenting, certified parenting coach, and creator to unpack how our unexamined biases can quietly erode secure attachment with our kids.

They dive into:

1. Why ALL humans have biases (and why that's not the same as being "bad")
2. The difference between recognizing bias and acting on it
3. How proximity and diverse exposure actually rewires our brains
4. Why "distance breeds suspicion, but proximity breeds empathy" (Tyler Merritt)
5. Teaching kids to pause and get curious instead of react with judgment
6. How authenticity about our own biases creates deeper connections

Whether it's biases about race, gender, neurodivergence, body size, or a hundred other things—this conversation will help you examine what you're unconsciously passing on.

📝 TAKE THE TEST: Harvard University's Implicit Association Test (IAT) — https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html

ABOUT THE GUEST:

Destini Ann Davis is a certified parenting coach, bestselling author, and speaker who helps parents create intentional, connected relationships with their children through her "Very Intentional Parenting" approach. Her TikTok has grown to over 900K followers, and she recently earned her master's in psychology.

1. Website: https://www.destiniann.com/
2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/destini.ann/
3. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/destini-davis-a44700266/
4. Book: Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

1. Harvard Implicit Association Test (IAT): https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html
2. I Take My Coffee Black by Tyler Merritt: https://www.amazon.com/Take-My-Coffee-Black-Reflections/dp/1546029419
3. Very Intentional Parenting by Destini Ann Davis

📚 PRE-ORDER ELI'S NEW BOOK: "How to Deal With Your ____, So Your Kids Don't Have To: An Encyclopedia for Ditching Your Emotional Baggage" (April 2026) 👉 https://www.attachmentnerd.com/how-to-deal-book

🎓 SECURE PARENTING PROGRAM: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/secure-parenting-program

CONNECT WITH ELI:

1. Website: https://www.attachmentnerd.com/
2. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
3. TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd

🎵 Music by Gold Child: https://www.goldchildmusic.com/