Q&A: How should I respond when my child touches herself?

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

- Why it is completely normal for young children to explore their bodies and engage in self-soothing behaviors.

- How parents can respond to self-touching in a calm, shame-free, developmentally appropriate way.

- The difference between setting healthy boundaries and unintentionally communicating shame around bodies or pleasure.

- Why some children may use self-touching as a form of sensory input, comfort, or emotional regulation, especially at bedtime.

- How to teach children about privacy and body boundaries using neutral, age-appropriate language.

- What to do when self-touching is happening in a shared bedroom or around siblings.

- Ways to help children expand their self-soothing toolbox with other calming sensory and bedtime supports.

- Why parents' own discomfort or cultural messaging around sexuality can sometimes shape how these moments feel.

- How to navigate sibling questions or reactions without making the behavior feel scary or secretive.

- The importance of helping children feel safe, accepted, and connected to their bodies while still maintaining appropriate boundaries.

This episode will help you feel more confident responding to common childhood self-soothing and body exploration behaviors with calm, clarity, and compassion.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your son always has his hands down his pants

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with how developmentally appropriate expectations, boundaries, body autonomy, and consent with sex therapist Dr. Holly Richmond

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your 3-year-old to do things they don't want to do

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!