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Q&A: What should I do when my toddler hits or pulls my hair?

25 min•9 april 2026

Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

  • Why the expectation that toddlers should already know how to regulate themselves is a common parenting myth.
  • What's actually happening in a child's brain and body when their emotional "gas tank" is empty.
  • Why your child's big reaction to a limit doesn't mean you've done something wrong.
  • The difference between holding a boundary and trying to solve your child's feelings.
  • What to do when your child's behavior is physically aggressive, like hitting or hair pulling.
  • Why your own triggers matter and how understanding them can help you respond differently.
  • The foundational factors (like sleep, fresh air, movement, and connection) that often drive behavior more than discipline strategies.

If you've ever felt powerless, guilty, or overwhelmed in the face of your child's big emotions, this episode will help you zoom out, reset unrealistic expectations, and approach these moments with more clarity and compassion—for both your child and yourself.

REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.

CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the psychology behind dysregulation with founder of Parenting Translator Cara Goodwin

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child is hitting

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton

🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about using the attachment relationship to help your toddler fall asleep, with Eileen Henry

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

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