42. "It was like I'd stepped into another realm." With Lizzie Bryher

Lizzie’s dark night began with a panic attack on a plane. She became claustrophobic, and “went into terror about the terror.” She had no idea what was happening, and fought it strongly. Gradually, she came to understand that she’d spent a lifetime suppressing and trying to cover up who she was, having been severely bullied as a child. She slowly began to move towards and be with her experience, and started to touch into a beautiful and sacred space.

Amongst many other things, we talk about how being in a safe and profoundly loving partnership opened something within her; the visceral power of the sensations and energies that emerge in the dark night; and becoming dedicated to the unravelling. We touch on fawning, pleasing and pretending to be okay; meeting the young, terrified part of ourselves with tenderness; and the cruelty of spiritual teachings. We discuss how the sense of authority shifts from outside to inside; the treasures that comes from being in this place; and being stuck in “shame pits.” We also mention fighting, kicking and screaming, and being at war with ourselves; doing ancestral work; being fully alive even amidst grief; and being “tenderised” by the dark night.

Lizzie Bryher is a somatic trauma informed practitioner. Her work involves tuning into the many layers of a person’s experience, sensing the connections between body, mind, personal history, ancestral influences, and what is unfolding in the present. She moves between what is spoken and unspoken, what is felt and suppressed, earlier experiences and present-day patterns, as well as what she notices in the relational space between herself and the person she is working with. As underlying patterns become clearer, Lizzie draws on the modalities best suited to what is emerging, supporting the process of feeling, integrating and releasing what has been held. Her approach is holistic, recognising that body, mind and spirit all hold important information. By working across these layers, Lizzie helps bring awareness to not only what is showing up in the present, but also the deeper patterns that may be keeping it in place. Her work is shaped by training in EFT, Havening, IEMT and NARM, and rooted in the relational approach of Thomas Hübl’s teachings. She is also the host of the Alchemical Meanderings podcast.

Connect with Lizzie

Fiona Robertson is the author of The Dark Night of the Soul: A Journey from Absence to Presence, and Eve Was a Realist: Poems for the Untamed Heart. She works one to one with people who are going through a dark night or spiritual emergency, accompanying them in this challenging terrain as they rediscover and deepen into their real selves. She also offers a monthly dark night gathering group, and occasional workshops for therapists and counsellors.

Connect with Fiona

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Music by James Waring / Design by Adam McKillop / Artwork by Stefan Armoneit