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The Kids or Childfree Podcast

80. Lia Love Avellino, LCSW on Grieving Your Past Life in Motherhood

56 min8 oktober 2025

In this conversation, Keltie Maguire and therapist Lia Avellino explore the intricate relationship between motherhood, identity, and grief. 

You'll hear them discuss:

  • The evolving nature of desire, the cultural narratives surrounding parenthood, and the importance of self-discovery in navigating these experiences. 

  • The coexistence of joy and grief in motherhood, and the need to honor both old and new identities.

  • The emotional weight of grief in decision-making, and how to navigate pre-emptive grief as you make your Kids or Childfree choice.

  • How the body can provide insights into your Kids or Childfree choice.

  • Why good enough, rather than "all in", can be enough.

  • How envisioning different life paths can help clarify our desires.

(0:29) Meet Lia and her Kids or Childfree decision

(13:26) Identifying a true desire and using somatic reactions to guide your decision

(16:50) Helpful fear vs. limiting fear 

(21:17) Lisa's path to clarity about motherhood with baby 1, baby 2, and baby 3

(30:55) Missing the childfree life & the value of uncertainty

(42:52) How to navigate grief of the path not chosen without falling into resentment or regret

(51:50) Envisioning exercises for a life with children and a life without children & the importance of role models

As mentioned in the show

Find Lia online at www.lialoveavellino.com.

Lia's Instagram is instagram.com/lialoveavellino

Tune into Lia's podcast, Unprocessed: https://open.spotify.com/show/66NB1tuqwTWJo72ZDW8MaO


About Lia

Lia is a licensed feminist clinical social worker who specializes in caring for individuals looking to break out of molds that don't serve them, particularly women and mothers. In her roles as CEO of group support organization, Spoke Circles, Advisor to Head & Heart at THE WELL, and relationship and motherhood columnist for mindbodygreen, Lia supports people in connecting to the wisdom inside themselves, their histories and their communities, in order to find their way. She graduated with distinction from Columbia University and has received awards for innovative research and excellence in the provision of therapeutic care to underserved populations, while managing a national component of President Obama's initiative to reduce teen pregnancy across the nation. Her writing and commentary has been featured in GLAMOUR magazine, The American Journal of Sexuality Education, Best Life, ABC's The Tamron Hall Show, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health, CNBCs MakeIt, Motherly, Oprah Daily and more. Lia lives with her husband and 3 children in Brooklyn, NY.

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👉 Brought to you by Keltie Maguire, Clarity Coach ▸ http://keltiemaguire.com

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