#262 - The Core

This week we get into 2003’s The Core, which is basically a too-little-too-late Armageddon but instead of blowing up a giant asteroid to save Earth, they must blow up … Earth, to save Earth? The kid from Road Trip loves Xena and Hot Pockets, and knows how to get you free long distance calls for life with a Nokia brick and a gum wrapper. What a total fucking shit show. 

Anyhow, here’s some alliterations and yelling! 

Jumping Jehoshaphat, jam that janky, jerry-rigged javelin, Josh! ‘Jectiles jumpstarting the gyro jelly! A bevy of deadly issues! Chris’ ceiling screaming about Geena Davis! Double Jenkins! Communist scarfs! There’s like seven million pigeons now! Double minority points! Double dipsy doo? No! Double clipsy doo! Swank steering the Brazzmobile! One-on-one romance over science sequences! The Coliseum goes completely kablooey! Depths of hell delvers! Right into the crickle crack! Instant crust to mantle transitions? Kat and Bob get got by lava rock and go plippity plop into the magma spot! French Sean Bean! Unobtanium Titanic turds! Hotpocket scuba tubes, and much, much more on this week’s episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made! 

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